off to war

On the 17th of January 2013, i woke up to discover two unexpected gifts.
I didn't see this coming.
I didn't even think Armin Mersmann would have any knowledge of my blog - it's so little - let alone take the time to write me such a thoughtful, honest and above all, supportive message.
I think i forget sometimes that i'm not the only artist in the world.
That sounds incredibly narcissistic but it's the simple fact that i live with myself every day, i'm only capable of knowing how i feel at all times and i'm not one to share.
I'll put it all over the internet, however. 
More making of the sense that is not, my speciality.

I regret not talking to my university friends about the feelings of inadequacy that were debilitating me while i was still in education.
They were probably feeling just the same and would not have been able to fix my problems but perhaps then i wouldn't have felt so small and so alone in my situation.
To be a Fine artist in a contemporary art school is not easy, thus why i fled so spectacularly.
This year i'll be receiving my Ordinary Degree, after 4 years of the university kindly holding my space open so i could complete with my Honours.
Which i can do whenever i wish. 
Hopefully they'd reaccept me but i'm not entirely sure DOJ is the place for me.
I'm not even sure if art is the right choice for me and until i know that i won't be returning to any institution of art.
It's really rather hard for someone like myself, who's ultimate goal within university was to receive a 1st and couldn't even bring themselves to start their final year.
It's all i wanted but i was a mess and it shouldn't have been what being an artist at art school was about.
I should have just wanted to create, instead i wanted to win.
Unhealthy but understandable.
I still want that 1st, i think i always will but if i go back to complete my degree, i just want to produce something that touches people.
Something i'm proud of.
But not too proud! 

So, thank you Mr Mersmann
I can't tell you how much receiving your message meant to me and how much it's given me to think about.
Happy Birthday for tomorrow and please keep producing your sublime works of art.
They may leave me timid but they are truly wonderful things to behold.

Also, to anyone who is currently at art school or even doing it solo and finds themselves in the same situation as i, message me if you'd like.
I can't fix it but i can empathise.
With bells on.

My other gift of the day was from my Mum.
It's always nice to wake up to a present, especially when you are utterly undeserving because of the ungodly hour you've finally dragged yourself out of bed to attempt functioning like a normal human being.
I won't tell you the hour but it was pretty bad.
The sun was going back down.
Shame, shame on me.
Thanks Mum.
You may be the only one i have but i still kinda think you're the best one.

Feel free to make barfing noises behind your computer screens at my unabashed soppiness!
I care not!



Listening to: Seamonster 'Bed of Roses'

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Anonymous said...

I really hope you find something that makes you truly happy. I just know that one day you'll produce something that you think is good enough. And if I ever make something that I think is good enough, you're the first person I'll want to share it with.

I lost so much when I went to university. It completely shattered my confidence and left me isolated. It took me so long to get my life started again, and even now I'm still a million miles away from where I imagine I'd like to be.

People often talk about talent as if it was something owed to the world rather than saying thank you for something shared.

So thank you, Lilliputian, for sharing. You really do make a difference. I love waking up in the morning and checking your blog, it often makes up the soundtrack to my day and always makes me feel a bit better about life.

And it does make me smile when I see that we have been watching the same films on TV.

Louise said...

I'll try and keep up the good work!

Being in isolation for so long has essentially meant i haven't had much or any effect on anybody's life for years now and i didn't know that would actually bother me.
I've always been rather singular. I enjoy other people's company but on my terms only and i tire easily. When i was more sociable, i couldn't be forced into situations i knew i wouldn't like but there were always situations and people who for some reason wanted to be with me, hear what i had to say and discover new and interesting together.
It's lonely not having that and i guess, unbeknownst to me at the time, this blog was a way of sharing those things i wasn't with the living, breathing, outside world.
So, it feels good to have an effect on your day to day life, anonymous. No matter how small, even if it's just a song you enjoy or to cause a smile at synchronised movie watching.
So don't disappear! Leave me comments and berate me if i put anything too silly on this little blog of mine.

I don't want to pry, you're anonymous for a reason but what is it that you do way up there in the high country? I'm intrigued.

Louise said...

'...new and interesting things together.'

It might make me nuts but errors in my writing make me very uncomfortable, they must be mended!

Anonymous said...

There are a million things that I'd like to tell you about myself, but I'm something of a non-entity.

After self-destructing at university, I moved back home and I'm still trying to piece my life back together by doing a very undemanding job and avoiding human contact as much as possible(although I sometimes miss it so much it makes me sad).

I suppose any form of happiness in my life comes from being close to my family (even though I find being at home quite suffocating sometimes) and the little sparks of imagination that I see from time to time.

One unbelievably exciting fact - You and I share the 27th August as our birthdays! Although I think I might be a year older (1986).

I do think I must be incredibly lacking in something as it took me ages to figure out what was going on in that "Barcher" picture in spite of the title.

And I won't be disappearing. I was still checking your blog in 2011 (it had become a habit by then). I wish I could promise to frequently comment, but it took me an eternity to do it the first time and I still feel very self-conscious about doing it, although you wouldn't know from the length of this.

DE



Louise said...

DE...hmm...Dreadfully Elusive? Dogmatic Evasiveness? Digital Ectoplasm?

First and foremost, i in now way believe you could possibly be a non-entity. I know basically nothing about you but i find what you have to say interesting, articulate and thoughtful and that's not because the conversation has been mostly centred around my woes. Saying that, i feel much the same, less than interesting, the kind of person people crap on from a great height and then forget them altogether. But i reckon if our families like us enough not to kick us out on the street, then we must be pretty okay, perhaps even more than okay. They might have to love us but they certainly don't have to like us!

The same birthday, huh? How very awesome of us to have done that. And yes, a years difference between our days of entry into the big bad world. That's pretty damn neat. You don't happen to have two older siblings do you? Because then it's just going to start getting a little Twin Peaks-ish.

Goodness, i don't think i posted anything in 2011. That was quite the year of sad. Thanks for sticking with me, lord knows why and for being brave enough to comment! You're more courageous than i, i don't comment on anybody's blogs for fear of leaving a moronic imprint on the net somewhere. I enjoy receiving your comments though, so don't be too fearful, i won't bite. Unless provoked or, well, asked.

If you started a blog, what would its content be? I'd be interested to see what kind of things you'd introduce me to.

Anonymous said...

Maybe you could make up a user name for me? It's funny, I keep referring to you as Lilly in my head, even though I know you're not. Do you mind being called Lilly, or even thought of as being called Lilly?

Also, thank you for those kind words, you do make feel like less of a non-entity. I really like talking with you. I don't think anything you share could ever be too silly, trivial or random not to make me smile.

I wish I could do the same, since there's no-one I'd rather share things with. But at least know that I won't forget about you, ever (barring a massive head injury).

And I'm not sure what I'd put in my blog. I'm really not great at discovering new things for myself. That's why I depend on you! I guess I'd start somewhere easy. My favourite song (or at least the one I keep coming back to the most) is New Order's 'Age of Consent'. And my favourite film is 'Midnight Run' (I like films with happy endings).

Oh, and it's good to know you bite on request. I won't worry so much now.













Louise said...

Forever more i dub thee, Dexterous Epistolean, for short you shall be known as Dex.
If you disapprove, well, tough, i'm the namer of names! Buaha!

Lilly works for me, it's awfully pretty. Nobody really calls me by my name anyhow, not even my family, to the point where it feels strange when people use it. Strange that. But i like being nicknameable, even though i don't know why i am. Louisiana Jones was one of the best ones i ever received.

You have mighty fine taste in music and films! Midnight Run is definitely a winner. I only saw it for the first time recently, purely by accident. What a happy accident that was. Charles Grodin is one of those men that can make me laugh without doing anything at all, like Bill Murray What legends these men are.

'I'm a pi-ra-nha!'

When i was little, my dad told me to bite my sister and i did it without pause. Obedient little menace with fangs. Maybe that's why i like vampires so much.

It is is cold in my room right now that i cannot feel my fingers as i type, methinks i should put the laptop down and try that alien thing called sleep! Yessum.

Louise said...

'...Murray. What Legends...'

'It is so cold...'

I am not on form right now.
I blame frozen fingers.

Louise said...

'...Murray. What legends...'

My brain, my stupid brain.

Dex said...

I love that you came back 20 hours later to change a misplaced capital letter. You really are my favourite person.

Rivers by Black City Lights - every day I fall in love with you and your blog just a little bit more. I can't help feeling I should be exchanging fragments of my immortal soul.

Dexterous Epistolean - you really are a clever little piranha, aren't you.

Louise said...

Hello Dex!

An admittance: it took me a good hour to come up with the 'Epistolean' part of your new title. Clever? I? Nah.

I'll take a bit of your soul. Keep it in a mason jar, i shall and label it 'A Fragment of Dex'. It shall sit on my shelves in amongst my books and feed on fantastical stories and well, dust. I've got lots of dust.


Ps. Rivers? Oh my goodness, Rivers. That is all :)

A question:

Where do you stand on the use of smileys?

I'm not very comfortable with it but sometimes it seems the only option to show emotion. I don't like doing it though...so forgive my use of the smiley, it's through the fault of my inelegant use of the English language.

Dex said...

I think you're very sweet to worry about little spelling mistakes and using smileys. I like you more than enough to not care whether you put a smiley in or not.

And when it comes to the English language, you put me to shame. Pathetically, this is me at my best. If you met me in real life, you'd see just how awful I really am. A human :) is the just about the most anyone will get from me in a social situation, either that or I'm staring intently at my cup of tea desperately wishing I was somewhere else.

'Inelegant use of the English language' - this from someone who uses the Shakespeare Insult Kit. I once read Julius Caesar, and on Act 1, Scene 1, I had to stop to look up the word 'artisan' (yes, I'm that bad).

I almost don't want to know the answer to this, but was I really worth an hour of your time to look up the word 'Epistolean'.

Louise said...

Oh, dearest Dex, you should hear the number of times i ask what a word means. There's a running joke/demand within my family that i look up the dictionary when perplexed, otherwise i will not learn! That's how often i ask.
And i don't speak eloquently in real life, i fumble my words and always seem to be searching for the right term/phrase/word to say but never find it. It's easier to sound articulate when you can spend an hour reviewing your choice of words. So fear not, we are much the same in our lack of prowess whilst speaking our native tongue.

Y'know how i said Cameron Frye was my spirit animal? I'm starting to think you are. Social situations are the worst and they make my brain curl up into the foetal position. Digital high five?

I devote my time to people i deem worthy of it, so i guess the fact that i spent an hour coming up with the latter part of your name means you are worth it.
I find you interesting, Dex and i actually think your use of punctuation and grammar is far better than mine. Whole truth and nothing but the truth and if i believed in God i wouldn't need to ask him to help me!

Dex said...

We're just way too nice to each other.

I like to think you lead quite a happy existence (please correct me if I'm wrong) just because it seems like such a nice way to spend your days, listening to music, reading books, watching films, discovering all the wonderfully creative things the internet has to offer (and buying ridiculously cool t-shirts).

I wish you could spend your summers up here talking with me about nothing - they call it the 'simmir dim' in Shetland, which just means summer twilight.

And this is my happy song - 'Message in Rouge' from the film 'Kiki's Delivery Service'. Sorry for being so random.

Louise said...

Hah, we are but i think we deserve some niceness and if us misfits can't shower each other in compliments then who else can we expect to do it?

Randomosity is something to be celebrated, not apologised for and now because of yours i just think you're the coolest.
I watched Arrietty over christmas and i nearly exploded from how pretty it was and the fact that Olivia Colman was voicing the mum. LOVE Olly Colly, her as Harriet in Green Wing is one of my favourite things in the world. For that matter, Green Wing is one of my favourite things ever ever ever. You've seen it right? Tell me you've seen it? I believe it should be prescribed to anybody who's ever sad. Genuinely. It's better than pills.

Those elements of my life are definitely ones i enjoy but they're all i really have. Aside from my family and the occasional outing, both of which i'm very grateful for, i'm somewhat of an unhappy creature. I got disappointed by life pretty early and crawled inside myself so i wouldn't have to look at it anymore and things unfortunately just got worse from there. Everybody i've ever known has let me down and i've done it in return. Only recently someone i cared for trampled all over me and that drags a girl down.
It sounds really selfish though, for someone who has a comfortable life, a family who loves her, a very part-time job that really puts no pressure on me at all. I get fed and watered. I get loved! I shouldn't be complaining. But i'm missing things. Things everyone else seems to have by now and it paralyses me somedays.
I joke about it but i genuinely feel like a broken toy most of the time, it's why i escape into other people's stories, they're so much better than mine.

Why do i tell you all these things, Dex? You should totally be the childhood friend that's lived next door all my life. Instead of the neighbours i'm not exactly fond of. Ugh, suburbia, so much nicer at night.

Simmir Dim? I kind of love that.

My comments are becoming longer than yours...

Dex said...

We really should have been childhood friends. I'm feeling slightly melancholic. Let's just pretend that we were. I wish I could give you some of the things you were missing, but I'm probably missing them too. Still, I'm an optimist and I'm convinced one day I'll be happy (which means you'll be happy too since I'm sure the two things are intertwined).

I was trying to work the phrase 'Optimist Prime' in there somewhere, thinking I was being clever. Then I googled it and found that there was practically an industry growing out of the use of that phrase. Oh, well...

I have seen Green Wing :) I wonder why they don't repeat it more often. The majority of my tv watching (while simultaneously surfing the web) occurs from about 10pm-late (I usually just end up watching 'Family Guy' and 'American Dad') and I just don't recall seeing it scheduled for ages. Also, I can't believe how long it's been since I saw Olivia Coleman for the first time in 'The Office'.

Imagine if you could share dreams, just fall asleep and go on adventures with a friend and there'd be all these happy and dramatic and sad and scary and idyllic moments and when you woke up the memories would seem real even though none of it had ever happened. I wish we could do that.

I once had an idea for a story about mapmakers living in a future metropolis and they were determined to make a detailed map of the city even though it was so vast and confusing and mysterious and no-one seemed to know what was at its heart. And as they go deeper into the city, things would get darker and scarier and more sinister, and at the centre there'd be this terrible secret that people didn't want them to discover (I never worked out that part). I think I'm going insane!

And please don't interpret the length of this post as some form of one-up-manship.

Louise said...

It looks like i lie in wait for your replies...maybe i do...maybe i'm a complete creeper. I hope not, that'd be a shame.

The fate of our happiness is intertwined? I wonder how.
Dream like the Inception gang do but less violence and robbing people. I'm not sure you'd want to be involved in my dreams however, they're somewhat hateful, more nightmares than anything else. Very human nightmares. I never used to dream or at least i didn't remember but then i got sad and my brain haunts me at night.

A confession...i've never really seen The Office. Parts of episodes here and there but my loathing for Ricky Gervais always put me off. Which, i know, is sad because it's meant to be great but uch, he's so smug it makes me nauseous. The adverts running for his new show cause me to either mute the tv or curse wildly at it. I quite possibly have issues...

Write your story, i'd read it for sure. I could illustrate it for you. Dark, creepy and architectural are kind of my thing.
What kind of sinster thing would it be at the centre? I mean in the sense of would it be a human undoing or something not of this world? In some ways i reckon something human would be worse, we can be such contemptible little creatures.

I totally take your reply as one-upmanship! Lets outdo each other with an overabundance of the english language.

I've heard Shetland doesn't have many trees, what in the world did you climb when you were little?

I've failed with the one-upmanship but forgive me, just this once? I'm so bloody sleepy today, if it wasn't unacceptable, i'd crawl everywhere i needed to go today.

Dex said...

I hope you feel a bit better today. Please don't feel you have to waste your energy replying to my feeble ramblings (although I'm very glad when you do).

To be honest, I never liked the 'secret' part of my story. It seemed so cliched and boring. Someone else can write it for me.

Shetland doesn't have many trees. I used to climb the one in my neighbour's garden, that's all I can remember. Westerloch Brae (in Lerwick) if you're interested in seeing where I grew up. It seems to have more trees now. Did you have lots of trees to climb on?

As for 'The Office' - meh! I can take it or leave it. Just like I can most things. And no, you don't have issues (well, not about that). I think it's a perfectly normal reaction.

Big week in Shetland this week. It's our local fire festival (Up Helly Aa) where people dress up as vikings and burn a galley.

Maybe I should write stories that you could illustrate. That could be how our fates are intertwined!

I'm sorry to hear about your nightmares, especially as they come from being sad. I really do wish that we lived next door to each other.

Can I ask, where do you go on your occasional outings?

PS - Please tell your sister that her '12 Days of Christmas' is like some sort of wonderfully epic journey.

Louise said...

Dexterous, you sound a little blue today or perhaps just in a rush. I cannot tell. I'm sorry if i've said too much, ruined your idea of me and dulled your days a little.
I'm not entirely glum, i laugh and joke and have very happy days indeed. It's not all sadness.

What form of viking are you going as? I hope you are dressing up, at least wearing a hat!
Are all Shetlanders pyromaniacs?

As for my outings, they're not exciting. I visit Glasgow, Edinburgh, Perth, Dundee and raid FOPP and drink copious amounts of chai lattes - makes me sound pretentious but they taste of awesome.
Sometimes a gallery is visited, i enjoy the Burrell in Glasgow. It's more a museum than gallery, full of wonderful oddities. They have hand-engraved armour which i could look at for hours.
I'd like to see more of Scotland, more countryside. Perhaps in learning to drive i will take more advantage.

PS. I think of you like a daily pen-pal, even after just a few days. Your 'feeble ramblings' make me smile and i look forward to them, so don't think i'm wasting my time on you. Named you, didn't i? :)

There's that smiley again...

Louise said...

We live 620km, 384miles, 14 hours 58mins apart.

I don't know why i looked that up but i felt the need to know and now i do!
Yay for knowledge.

Dex said...

Sorry to post twice in a day. I thought you might be feeling a bit bored (although this might just drive you over the edge). Have you been up to much today?

I've had a very productive day watching old episodes of 'Whose Line Is It Anyway?' (the UK version). Have you ever seen it? It's very hit and miss, but I love the format and where else can you see 2 people singing a love duet about a cat litter tray? So no rushing about today (it must have been the short paragraphs).

You could never say too much that I would ask you to stop. I love that you share things happy and sweet, sad and dark. And the music's frickin' amazing too. I don't say it often enough, but thank you so much for introducing me to all these amazing sounds. I'm going to have to start asking your opinion on films showing at Mareel (our local cinema). I already regret not going to see Berberian Sound Studio. Django Unchained - is that something that would appeal to you?

I've only ever been to Glasgow once in my life, never even visited Perth or Dundee (passed through them both on the way to Edinburgh).

I used to like Princes St. in Edinburgh because they had HMV, Waterstones & Starbucks all next to each other. The Waterstones even had another Starbucks on the top floor. I would sometimes wander down there at half 7 in the morning and get a caramel hot chocolate, then spend the rest of the day flitting between the 2 stores. One of my happiest memories was when I went into Starbucks and the girl behind the counter asked me if I was having my usual. I'll never forget that.

I'll have to try a chai latte next time. You'll have to excuse me now, I have an overwhelming urge to set something on fire.

:) - just so you don't feel awkward.

Louise said...

How was the pyromania? Did you soothe the flame-loving beastie inside of you?
I was reading up on the festival and this line came up in the description:

On the evening of Up Helly Aa Day, over 800 heavily-disguised men (no women, thank you, we're vikings!) form ranks in the darkened streets.

Hah, tickled me that did.

A fact: my last name means 'yellow-haired viking'.
Odd because i am very much a brunette and a tiny person. I couldn't scare kittens.

Did you study in Edinburgh? It's a rather beautiful city but it drives me nuts. I can't walk down Prince's Street without getting seriously hacked off. People are rude but yeah, the triple-awesome-store whammy that occurred there was pretty cool. The streets further up are more to my liking but i'm definitely a Glasgow girl. My dad's from there so maybe it's just innate loyalty. You should visit someday, lots of history in our region but perhaps not as much as yours! I must see this 'northern mardi gras'.

The only celebration we seem to have is Braemar Night and that's just an excuse for the 'carnival' to come to town and all the resident losers to get drunk and be offensive. There is an over-abundance of candy-floss though and how can you turn that down?

I watched WLIIA? when i was little, late at night, when i wasn't supposed to. The singing was always my favourite part. They only seem to show the american version now though, which i like but it's not as good. Wayne Brady though? They should let that man sing all the live long day. Love it when he appears on How I Met Your Mother.
Wow, sounds like we're tv addicts. I'm cool with that, how 'bout you?

Django Unchained. See that. See that as soon as possible! Tell you what, i don't get to the cinema too often because our nearest is half an hour away and it's so freaking expensive! So i'll advise and you report back. Deal?
And no need to thank me for introducing you to new music, 'tis a pleasure. I keep forgetting what bands i've listened to because of the way i storm through Spotify every day. Austra were playing over the trailer for the British version of 'Pusher' and i had no idea!

Important question:

Fleetwood Mac, new or/and old, yay or nay?

Dex said...

Hi Lilly

I'm actually in the admin office at Mareel cinema just now - Django Unchained, 17:10. You have way too much control over my actions. They gave me a complimentary ticket - reward for standing at the door, tearing tickets for a 'Fiery Sessions' (not as exciting as it sounds) concert.

Up Helly Aa today, but it's raining. Sitting in the cosy screen 2 of Mareel cinema, or standing in the rain, struggling to get a view of the parade - I have no regrets.

WLIIA? The fact that you put the question mark after the title, as it should be, is one of the reasons I love you so much.

I wish I could see more of Glasgow. I never saw any of it the only time I was there. You could make me an itinerary.

We live way too far apart. Please send me more knowledge. Yay, indeed.

PS - I will give your Fleetwood Mac question serious consideration tomorrow - I'm actually a bit rushed just now (please forgive any spelling mistakes).





Louise said...

Just call me the Puppet Master, or the Dex Master, or indeed the Master of Puppety Dex.
You're not a puppet, ignore everything i say from this point on, i've perhaps lost my senses a little...
Was it good though? Was it, was it, was it?
Did Jamie Foxx fill Idris Elba's shoes well? Still kinda pissed Elba didn't take the role, i think because of Prometheus, which was okay but soooo not worth the amount of charisma flowing out of that man.

FAO Tarantino: Forgive Idris for his silly mistake and cast him in something!

Correct punctuation causes love? Hah, if only i'd known that years ago! Commas and dashes and brackets, oh my!
I'm completely jealous that you're at the cinema.
When's your favourite time to go?
Mine's when only a few others are there, any time in the day just as long as it's almost abandoned.
Crowds bug me. Shocked, aren't you?

Err knowledge? Uhm, not my forte but did you know that Shakespeare invented the name Jessica?
On a bit of a Shakespeare kick...i make no apologies!
AND that at the side of my house there is a path called Coffin Way. Funeral processions used to take place from one side of the town to the cemetery and this path was part of the journey. I've run, skipped, wandered, fallen flat on my face down that path for 22 years of my life and it was only 3 years ago i found that out! I have creepy knowledge.

Tag, you're it.

Dex said...

Okay Lilly, are you ready for this?

Django Unchained

With my harshest critical hat on, I would say it was good, maybe even very good.

I thought the first half hour was excellent, probably because I love Christoph Waltz so much. Fast paced, very funny, stylish violence and great music.

Then there was quite a long lull after Leo entered the picture (although to be fair to Mr. DiCaprio, I don't think the two things are directly related - he does okay). The film does lose a lot of its humour and some of the violent scenes are a little bit too nasty for my liking.

And the last half hour is pretty much OTT violence with almost every character getting shot to pieces, which got a little bit tiring after a while (still good though).

The acting is pretty decent across the board. LD and Sam Jackson's characters are fairly interesting, and Waltz is very entertaining. And there is something slightly unsettling about the permanent grin fixed to Laura Cayouette's face.

But Django is a very disappointing hero. I'm not sure if I blame Foxx or QT. All I know is that the film is missing an emotional core. There is absolutely nothing between Django and his wife - they exchange about 2 lines of dialogue throughout the film. I thought it might develop into a tale of friendship between the 2 bounty hunters (Waltz and Foxx). It was heading that way, but was then discarded.

Having said all that, I'm still very glad I went to see it. It's well worth watching, and QT can sure make movies. But his acting...all I can say is that he has a cameo that is so bad that I can only assume he was taking the piss out of himself.

So there's my review, but you are talking to someone who regards Samuel L. Jackson's best film roles as being in Jurassic Park and National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon 1.

Cinema preference - Mondays & Tuesdays, during the day, when everyone's at work and I'm not. I imagine you're shocked by this information.

Fleetwood Mac - I bought Rumours a long time ago, and was a bit disappointed. You know that sound - meh! As for old Fleetwood Mac, I had to do a search on your blog - the chorus to Future Games really does melt my heart a little. You really need to educate me.

I'm not sure if correct punctuation causes love. Maybe it's just being you (feel free to be sick).

And since we're sharing local knowledge, Shetland has a tiny, little village called Twatt. That is all.

Louise said...

It brings me great joy to know that you share in my love of adolescent humour. Twatt. Hehe.
But you have just broken my heart on two counts.

1. Django...it's just...okay? Saddening. Heartbreaking. Life-ending! Alright, perhaps a little too far but uft, i was so looking forward to it. Lets just blame it on silly old Idris Elba. We shall still love him, or at least i will for i know not where you stand on the fellow, but he must be punished in some way.
I'll review him badly perhaps, his next time out. But maybe not, Pacific Rim looks pretty rad. Uft. Conflicted, i be.
It may have lacked spirit because Foxx is not capable of playing a 'hero', only douchebags.
Lets blame him!

2. How can you possibly call Rumours, 'meh'?!
It's freaking sublime! Oh Dex, dearest Dex, we may have a problem here. It causes me so much confusion when others don't like the Mac. That's such a perfect album.
I think i can quite possibly let this one slide however. Just this once though! Seeing as you like the 'just post-peter green' era. There really is such a difference between the three stages of the Mac. To me, they're all wonderful and i'll just have to convince you otherwise!

And lets not call it education. Lets call it, illumination.
I like that better.

I feel you should save your love for someone more deserving. I'm just a strange little person from Scotland after all.
But i won't refuse it, perhaps i'll keep it in another mason jar, along with the fragment of your soul. I'll send you mine in return and you may keep it in any form you wish. Somewhere cosy though, yeah? I'm a cold soul.

What you do today, Dexterous? Were there plans for world domination or stealing all the Jaffa Cakes in the world? I'd do that, in a heartbeat. I might be craving tiny, moon-shaped cakes...hmm.

Dex said...

What did I do yesterday? The same thing I do everyday - try to take over the world! Admittedly you didn't provide me with the perfect set up for that line, but I think I made it work. You did watch 'Pinky and the Brain' when you were little, right?

Please mend your broken heart and watch Django Unchained with an open mind (and listen to the song 'Freedom' from the film). And while we're on the subject, what's your favourite and least favourite Tarantino film?

I'm guessing that Fleetwood Mac and Rumours are to you what Camera Obscura and My Maudlin Career are to me. So I ask you, yay or nay?

By the way, if I had said 'meh!' to describe Rumours while I was sitting next to you, would you have bitten me?

And as for my love, just promise me that you won't trade it for Jaffa Cakes.

Louise said...

Put your hands together my friend!
Jaffa Cakes and love are the most sublime combination i ever did hear of!
Forced to choose though? Hmm. I dunno. Love is fickle but Jaffa Cakes are eternal...this is too hard!

I hadn't listened to Camera Obscura for yearsssss. Wasn't really into them before but i think your reminding me has ignited a new appreciation. And yeah, My Maudlin Career is indeed my Rumours but it's definitely not my favourite album. I don't actually have one, it's far too hard choose with all the splendid bands out there!

Dex...you'd be lucky not to get bitten every 10 minutes. I like to surprise bite, it causes humorous noises. Beware the fanged lilliputian.

Pinky and the Brain
They're Pinky and the Brain
Yes, Pinky and the Brain
One is a genius, the other's insane
They're laboratory mice
Their genes have been spliced
They're dinky
They're Pinky and the Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain,
Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain


BEST.EVILCRIMEDUO.EVER!

Louise said...

Total question answering fail in my response there.
Sorry Dexterous.

Tarantino Favourite: Inglourious Basterds
Tarantino Least Favourite: Sin City - controversial but i thought it was bloody awful.

My Maudlin Career: It's lovely. It really is but it doesn't stir my soul like Rumours does.

What's the Dex version of a Lilly-bite? As i'm sure i would get some form of punishment for basically 'meh'ing your most loved album.

Dex said...

Aw, Lilly, you didn't have to come back to answer even more pointless questions. I feel very special.

Inglourious Basterds - yes (especially that bar scene). I've never even seen Sin City. I know it has something to do with Frank Miller who wrote 'The Dark Knight Returns'. And while I'm being very geeky, even though I have no idea what a Judd Nelson fist pump is, did you know tht he voiced Rodimus Prime in Transformers: The Movie (1986)? Too much?

'Meh!' to My Maudlin Career. You're just trying to get a bite. I think that you're a little bit jealous that Tracyanne Campbell is the other girl to have my unconditional love. But I'll still have to devise a suitable punishment for your insolence, you cheeky little non-conformist. We will have to be careful to stop this relationship developing into some form of sado-masochism.

21st Century Bronte Sisters. I used to wonder how Emily, Charlotte & Anne spoke to each other? Now, I know.

Louise said...

Special, indeed. Plus, i love questions. Asking them, answering them, staring blankly at the asker because i have no idea what the answer is...which is often...

No need to fret about any sado-masachistic behaviour. I'm totally adverse to pain. My threshold is negative. If i was captured and due to be tortured, i would have told them everything they needed to know before they even got the pliers out!
We shall be just fine and i don't blame you for loving Miss Campbell more, she's a stud. Can you call a girl a stud? Probably not but the voice, the lovely, lovely voice!

You're still getting bitten for Rumours though, narf! :)
But tell you what, i'll listen to as much Camera Obscura as i possibly can and try to educate myself in the wonder that makes you love them so. I wish to understand. You have to listen to Rumours again though, at least once, if not more.

Do you think the Bronte Sisters fist-bumped?
We're so not cool.

Oh, and thank you for bestowing upon me some of the greatest geeky knowledge i ever did hear. Judd Nelson basically is a robot in disguise. He is that awesome.

The Judd Nelson Fist Pump can be found here:

http://youtu.be/Sv1I4q6lOpo

Live it, learn it, love it.

Dex said...

I'm actually quite excited to listen to Rumours again. It is definitely time for a reappraisal. Dreams did save the day at the Mareel Christmas party, following on as it did from that soul destroying sound we like to dub 'Mareel Lift Music' that seems to constantly pour from the sound system.

I'll tell you one reason you'll always win my heart from Miss Campbell. Lovely voice apart, she does seems to sing about the same thing in just about every song. With you I get German cinema, childhood films, music, art, Chuck Norris, animated shorts, cool tops and t-shirts, hilariously abusive sister conversations, Dante's Inferno, and, for some reason, a picture of you holding a Peanut Butter Kit-Kat Chunky Bar. Who could possible give me more?

The Judd Nelson Fist Pump - I had no idea it was from 'The Breakfast Club'. I haven't seen that since high school. Watched it in Media Studies, and have always carried a grudge against it. I used to be a bit of a film snob, and it pissed me off that out of every film ever made, the one film we watched in a class that was supposed to teach us about film-making, was this one. I'm over it now though...but FFS, The Breakfast Club!!! But the fist pump is an epic moment (now everybody freeze-frame).

I'm glad I got over my film snobbery. Here's a list of random films that I will happily watch on tv every time they are on:

Trading Places
Bowfinger
Midnight Run
The Naked Gun films
Addams Family Values
Jurassic Park
The Die Hard trilogy (because there never was another one).
The Indiana Jones trilogy (because there never was another one).
Mission: Impossible
Clear and Present Danger

And the last two films on the list feature Henry Czerny from 'Revenge' being totally awesome. Why do I form attachments to totally random actors?

The Animated Lord of the Rings was terrifying. What the fudge was Peter Jackson thinking, giving the black riders armour?

Angelica Huston in 'The Witches' - I wonder if Gomez Addams knew what he was letting himself in for? And am I the only one to find Jane Horrocks still slightly adorable, even when she's bald and has a rash covered scalp?

I always thought my headstone would read 'will be vaguely remembered'. And I always thought I'd die by having leopard drop on me from a tree. Do you feel a little less demented now?

So no sadomasochism. Oh...that's...um...good. I am still getting bitten? Admit it, you definitely feel a bit less demented.

I'm sure James Joyce would be impressed by our streams of consciousness. I'm not entirely sure what I mean by that, but it sounds intelligent.

Oh, and important question. Alien, Aliens, Alien 3, Alien: Resurrection or Prometheus? You really need to send me lists of bands/films they could bring up here so I can slam it in the Mareel programmers face.

Good gravy. Apologies. That was a long post, made longer by me typing that, and that, and that, and that....

Louise said...

Hah, you definitely can't be a film snob and like Bowfinger. You just can't. And you didn't like Live Free or Die Hard?! But Timothy Olyphant's so damn, wonderfully creepy in it! And the Yippee-ki-yay motherfucker song!
It's good we disagree on things, otherwise we'd become sickening in our praising of each other's taste. You're wrong though. Soooo wrong!

And come on! The Breakfast Club is a filmic feat. No, it's not the most beautiful of movies, the most intellectual, heartening etc. but it's so damn iconic. And the music, oh the music! And there are some grade A insults going on in that movie. And when they whistle The Great Escape? God, that's good.
Hmm. I think you hit a John Hughes nerve there...Sorry...kind of a die hard - look at that punnage - fan, except for Sixteen Candles. What was that piece of crap?

Random Actor Attachments:

Marky Mark
Stephen Dorff
Kyle Chandler
Kevin McKidd
Johnny Lee Miller

There's more, i just can't think of them right now. But oh lord, there are more.

Peter Jackson can be explained in one word: Nincompoop.
The only thing he's gotten right are Heavenly Creatures, Braindead, Meet The Feebles and casting Ian McKellen as Gandalf and Viggo Mortensen as Aragorn. Otherwise he's a Tolkien ruining nincompoop.
I'm five. Hi there!

I shall redeem myself by knowing what you meant with your James Joyce referencing. I think Virginia Woolf would think it was pretty good too. She was a neat woman, crazy as sin but she knew her words.
Stream of consciousness can't be easy to write without sounding completely unhinged.

My essays for uni used to get written in a sort of wordy frenzy. My sister, who would edit them for me, would be infuriated by my lack of structure. Can't help it though, if i doesn't get written then and there, i'll forget!

I sha'n't forget you Dexterous. Never ever. You can have the plot next to mine if you want. Our headstones could both read:

They geeked out together.
A lot.

Sound good? Or just weird and creepy?
We could get a crypt!
Okay, that creepy...

I feel i should take myself away now but before i do i shall say three things:

1. In your face Tracyanne Campbell! Loves me more :)
2. Aliens - i don't know why, i kind of think James Cameron's a rubbish director, Avatar? Jesus that's bad, but i really like the second movie.
3. Dexterous Epistolean retains the right to be bitten by Lilliputian as long as he does not break her heart by dissing something she truly loves such as anything Joss Whedon has ever done.

Pinky swear x <- that's supposed to be the crossing, kind of doesn't work, does it?...

Louise said...

Ughhh, mistakes, everywhere!

"Okay, that was creepy..."

"...supposed to be them crossing..."

I suck.

Louise said...

A confession: I totally love Alien vs Predator...

Ashamed of me?




I post more comments than you do...

Dex said...

I can only apologise most sincerely for leaving AvP off the list of choices. Didn't they make a sequel? I suppose I could look it up, but I'm not going to.

Ashamed of you? Never. Although I can't say I'm surprised.

I have to say I'm more Alien than Aliens. Aliens is just a little bit too much of a gung-ho, let's kick-ass, we're so American, kind of film. And it doesn't have Ian Holm trying to force a pornographic magazine down Sigourney Weaver's throat.

Never apologise for dissing Peter Jackson and his LOTR fiasco. That's right, fiasco. I'd better look that up first to make sure it's a word. Fiasco - a complete failure of any kind. Yep, that's the one I want. Admittedly, that's a tad harsh because there were a handful of decent elements. A couple of actors, the music, maybe a few other things. And it would take someone with a special talent to completely ruin the greatest story ever told (sorry Jesus, I'm probably joining you in hell Lilly).

But I grew up reading LOTR, and maybe nothing can ever re-create that feeling you get when reading something for the first time that thrills you so much.

I just knew that you'd get the James Joyce reference. You're a clever cookie. I'm not, I just pinch my literary knowledge from John Sessions and Authors from the early episodes of WLIIA? He even did Virginia Woolf!

I really have to stop pouring vitriol on things I've never seen or barely remember. Random paragraph, but it had to be said.

Did you ever see that episode of Malcolm in the Middle where Dewey got a tattoo of Lois' name and she couldn't decide she was flattered or mad. Well, replace mad with creeped, and you'll get my reaction to our crypt. You did watch MitM, didn't you? Bryan Cranston rocks!

I know you love Bruce, and you warned me against breaking your heart (again). But did he lose his charm when he lost his hair? (moves to cower in the corner).

For some reason, here's more films I never miss:

The Man Who Knew Too Little (for the most hilariously pointless throwaway gag in history - "Are you sure you were in Germany?", "Downtown Brussels").

The Thing (flamethrowers + hot wire + blood tests + men tied to furniture = classic cinema).

Breakdown (Kurt Russell again - "my wife is locked up in a hole in your fucking barn and if you don't give me the key I'm gonna blow your fucking head off").

Why do you put up with me, Lilly?

And how come you use little i's and I use big I's? Am I being very arrogant in using a big I for myself? It's just something I noticed. For some reason I got a lot of pleasure from typing this.

You really are the most utterly fantastic girl. It really does give me a warm feeling to see you come back to correct spelling mistakes. As for me, I have no such compulsion.

Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters - so that's something you recommend we show up here.

What do you think of Watchmen? Have you read the book?

You really wouldn't want me to post more. You really wouldn't. I have to ask again, why oh why do you put up with me?

PS - Are you are watching The Princess Bride?

Louise said...

:(

I wrote an epic reply and it hasn't posted.
That's majorly upsetting.

:(

Louise said...

Round 2 and if blogger decides to post my previous epic comment after i've typed this new one, i'm going to pitch a fit!

Unfortunately i only caught the last half hour of The Princess Bride, as i had no idea it was on today but luckily it lives very happily on my shelves, lying in wait for when i'm in the mood for a good old dose of fantastical goodness.

My sister told me earlier, while we were watching it, that some guy at an airport was detained for wearing a t shirt that had Mandy Patinkin's infamous lines...

My name is Inigo Montoya, prepare to die!

...imprinted upon it.
How silly is that? I suppose it's the not the brightest idea to turn up to an airport foretelling murdery death. But still! Everybody in the free speaking world should know that line. I use it at least once a week. I wrote it on one of my desks in high school for crying out loud! I'm not a vandal, i was taking the table top with me when i left...i was allowed, my art teacher said so...

Love Mr Patinkin, i do. He gets a free pass for life for The Princess Bride. So does everybody in the movie for that matter, even Chris Sarandon. What am i saying? He already had one for being the masterful voice of Jack Skellington and being the original Jerry Dandridge.
I think i may actually like Chris Sarandon. That makes me shudder a little.
Oh, and Child's Play! Chucky freaks me out but the first movie is just epic. Ep-ic.

Do you watch Homeland? I hope you do. If only to see Claire Danes crying face. It's a thing of frightening beauty. The only one who could possibly challenge her for the title of Ugliest Crier is Justin Long. He laugh-cries and that's terrifying. Google it. You won't be disappointed.

I don't like this message as much as i did the last. Oh well, i shall soldier on as i feel you need my words. Seeing as i'm the Dex-Master and all...

Louise said...

I really don't want to go and see The Hobbit, especially as Peter Jackson 'the Spectacular Douchebag' has split it into three movies...idiot. But it's the Hobbit, i have to see that, don't i? It's just one of those books. I didn't actually enjoy it that much though when i read it but it was only like 3 or 4 years ago so i think i missed out on that childhood experience of Tolkien. I still know how important it is though and he's going to ruin it and i must see how. Ugh, i hate Peter Jackson. No wonder Del Toro ran away from the project like a stompy little girl. I would too.
And why is Legolas in the movie?! WHY?!
Orlando Bloom is beyond useless. He makes Paul Walker look like a thespian. Ugh.
I'm going to have to see it though, aren't i? It's like roadkill, you have to look...or is that just me?
Yeesh, i'm going to scare you away with my talk of crypts and dead things. I'm normal, i swear it!
I do have bird skulls in my room though...for drawing purposes only! I didn't scavenge for roadkill or murder any birdies, i borrowed/stole them from my art teacher...i'm not helping myself here, am i?
Why do i put up with you? Hah, why do you put up with me?! Weird little creature that i be.
I know my reasons for you, however. They are simple. T'is because you're a lovely little soul and i get great joy from unapologetically nerding out with you. I lie in wait for your messages like a hungry badger. Yessum.
So ramble away dearest one, it makes me smile stupid amounts :) <- just like that but more human, if that's what you could call my excuse for a face.

I think i'm a bit slumpy - grumpy/sleepy.
Hah, sorry Dexterous, i shall find my chipperness again and throw it your way.
Or drag you down to grumpy hell with me. Yessum. I think we'll be fine down there anyways, that's where all the good music goes.
We shall burn in hell and watch all the Alien Movies in peace. Even Alien vs Predator: Requiem. That's the sequel and i've seen it...but i don't remember anything about it. That's how much of an impression it made!
Y'know, i think i know the reason why i like Aliens the most and it's not because i think it's better than Alien, it's not but the presence of Lance Henriksen seems to draw me to the dark side. I love him for some reason. He scares me but in a loveable way. Like Gary Oldman and Alan Rickman.

Speaking of that beast of a man, y'know what film i always watch without fail when it appears on the tv?

Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.

Everytime, without fail. I bloody love it. And yeah, i'll admit it, i sing along with Bryan Adams crooning his wee heart out for i love him so. I have no shame! I would see that man in concert!
Aww man, there goes any semblance of cool i had. Destined to be desperately uncool, that is i. You okay with talking to a Bryan Adams loving loser? I hope so.
Don't you just love it when Rickman dies? Man, best death scene ever. That man is a god and i bow down to his masterful overacting through sheer boredom. Even acting badly he outshines everyone, even Morgan Freeman!

Louise said...

Of course i've seen MitM. It was a seminal moment in my childhood development. I have two older sisters and they tied me to stuff so i totally identified with Dewey, the little tyrant that he was.
Bryan Cranston is turning out to be rather god-like isn't he? Who would have thought the man who roller-skated in a blindingly shiny, obscenely tight blue outfit would turn out to be one scary, drug dealing motherfudger? Not i.
Did you see him in Total Recall being a complete badass? I kind of didn't want him to lose to Farrell, as much as i love him also but Cranston wins.
I have to watch Drive again now. I just do.

Oh, and any more speaking ill of The Willis and we shall be having words. Angry, poisonous, bitey words! You'd probably enjoy that though...
I lie, anyway. He's kind of rubbish these days but i still love him so. He's like the raggedy old teddy bear that you just can't throw away...and i never will.
Another confession: RED? Lovedddd it! Brucey did well in that, lots of hitting things. And Malkovich usually makes me want to claw my skin off but he was quite possibly the best part of the film. It's like Jeremy Irons all over again. I'm starting to question my taste in actors.

Look at all those little 'i's'. You are fully correct when using the capital 'I' my dear. My use of the lower case is a nasty habit that i can't seem to be bothered to shake. It makes my sister angry and i enjoy that a little. The grammar nazi.
I actually know sweet FA about grammar and punctuation. We weren't taught very well or at all in school so i kind of just feel it out. Which is why everything i write lacks structure and you may notice posts change from time to time because i fret over where a comma should go. Ugh, lame. I'm even scared of semi-colons! I know what they do but using them correctly causes me anguish. English is hard :(

I'm perhaps becoming overly friendly with the smileys. If i start using 'lol' just slap/shoot/kick me, ok?

Watchmen? Meh. Hated the film and saw it before i had even thought of reading the book so i'm not that bothered really. It made me laugh more than anything else. What with Jeffrey Dean Morgan being all rapey, Billy Crudup's giant blue, err, uhm, junk? And that hilarious sex scene between Nite Owl and Laurie Jupiter. Just silly. And why did they let Jackie Earle Haley be Rorschach? His voice grated on me the entire time.
Silly, silly, silly!
I'll take Batman, any day!

I would highly recommend getting Hansel & Gretel but it all depends on what you Shetlanders are into! Do you enjoy horror/fantasy up there in the high country? If not, i'd say give it a miss.

My suggestions for the upcoming year to throw in the Mareel programmers pie-hole are as follows:

Star Trek: Into Darkness
Oz: The Great and Powerful (cause you have to, y'know?)
I, Frankenstein
Iron Man 3
Elysium
Pacific Rim
Warm Bodies
Mama (not for the faint-hearted)
Jack The Giant Slayer
John Dies at the End
Welcome To The Punch
Filth
Stoker
The Place Beyond The Pines
Evil Dead (original and remake)
Carrie (original and remake)
Joss' Much Ado About Nothing!
This is the End
World War Z
Despicable Me 2 (love me some minions)
This Is 40 (for the Paul Rudd of it all)
Riddick (don't you judge me, i love Vin and Pitch Black was an epic sci-fi/action movie)
Rush
Oldboy (original and remake - it's Samuel L. Jackson, that's gotta be worth a watch!)
The World's End (the mint cornetto!)
Thor: The Dark World
The Counselor
The Fifth Estate
Anchorman: The Legend Continues


I think that'll do for now...hmm?
I'm sleepy. Well, i'm always sleepy but more so now!
And i have this sudden need to watch Brick, i don't know why but i do.
I think i'll go do that. Shame you can't watch it with me Dex. Watch it simultaneously?

So long for now, awesome one.

I had to split this into three separate comments because blogger is a loser and i apparently rambled for longer than allowed. Fascists.

Louise said...

Jesus...

Dex said...

I'm way too late in posting this.

I was going to say...

Poor Lilly.

But don't worry, we have all the time in the world to talk to each other about anything we like. And that's a nice feeling.

I'll wait patiently for your epic reply, or any other kind of reply.

I actually wrote that out, checked to make sure you hadn't already posted, found out that you had, then edited this reply.

Good night :) x (have a smiley and a small kiss for your troubles).

And Inigo Montoya - The Hero's Hero.

Louise said...

I'll never sleep! I'm so awake it hurts.

I've never understood why an 'x' symbolised a kiss.
They say it's because that's the shape of two lips meeting but it's totally not. Nuh uh. Maybe fish kissing but not humans!

I looked it up:

Apparently, it is for the above reason but also because if people couldn't sign their name, they would write an 'X'. We all know this but what i didn't know was that they would kiss it to show their sincerity.

Consider yourself knowledged.

Dex said...

Oh, Lilly. Lovely, curmudgeonly, adorable, sleepless Lilly. You really are a complex creature.

X - Kissing Cousins - Did you learn that in school? Did you find it odd? Not up here. Let's just say that some places in Shetland are very close-knit. A happy thought for a Monday morning.

I'll watch Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves just for Alan Rickman.

"You, my room, 10:30 tonight. You, 10:45, bring a friend".

I hate that a feel the need to quote from every film I mention.

Never liked Jeremy Irons trying to out-Gruber Hans in Vengeance (he failed dismally). I wish AR would play another Hollywood action film villain. He set the gold standard.

To be honest, I couldn't give a toss what kinds of films my fellow Shetlanders were into. They marry their 1st cousins for goodness sake! And they sold out Quartet! Fucking morons! Remember I said I had to stop pouring vitriol on things I've never seen...

I never got through Watchmen the film. Wondered if I was missing anything. Apparently not. Didn't like Rorschach's voice (not what I had in my head at all when reading the book). Liked the use of Nena's 99 Luftballons. And I like the music video for that song. Have I lost any semblance of cool too.

Batman - Mr. Burton's or Mr. Nolan's (or, dare I ask, Mr. Schumacher's - no, I didn't think so). Please tell me that you think Michael Keaton is way superior to Christian Bale. You're going to choose Bale, aren't you? Just because I ran over bald Bruce Willis in my vitriol-fueled criticism tractor.

Have you noticed that vitriol is my word of the week. I'm not even 100% sure that I'm using it correctly.

Christian Bale was an outstanding Patrick Bateman. Really identified with him since we're both narcissists with a penchant for Valentino suits (although I have a slightly better haircut). Are these film references doing anything for you?

Funny thing is, as Batman (hah, I just realised how close that was to Bateman), I can see the psychopath in Keaton far more than I can in Bale ("C'mon, let's get nuts!" in full Beetlejuice/Betelgeuse mode). It took me years to discover that Otho was supposed to be an interior designer. And I still don't know why he entered through the window.

This is long and I'm not proof-reading.

Dex said...

I remember your love for Inigo Montoya and his quote of quotes from a previous blog.

Have you seen Dog Day Afternoon? I only mention it because Chris Sarandon's in that too, as Al Pacino's gay wannabe-transexual lover/wife. Pacino is unbelievbly amazing in that film, y'know, back in the days when he didn't have to shout to make a point.

Thank you for your list of films. It shall be slammed repeatedly into the face of anyone with any influence in the matter of cinema programming.

As much as I love you and your, let's say eclectic, taste in films, I'm not sure I can bring myself to present it as my own when showing it to other people. They wouldn't believe me for a start. They all know that I love Bowfinger (it's just the happiest film ever made - "Good to see you again, brother", then you get a cover of Kung-Fu Fighting and Christine Baranski with unbelievable dagger-like nails leading an army of ninjas - how can anyone not smile).

Actually, no, we're in this thing together. It's our list of films.

Okay, so they're doing a remake of Oldboy with Samuel L Jackson. Am I reading that right? We are talking about the same Korean film, are we? I imagine they will be toning down the incestuous sex scenes. Pity, it might have done quite well in Shetland. I'm a horrible human being.

I mentioned this before, but Samuel L. Jackson is just hilarious in National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon 1 (another reason no-one listens to me about films). Especially the 'Head and Shoulders' advert at a crime scene.

I'm so sorry, but I have to quote it:

"What you got Irv?"
"Beats me Sarge. Dandruff, maybe just dry itchy scalp"
"Have you tried this, Irv? I use it."
"Head & Shoulders! But Sarge, you don't have dandruff."
(thumbs up) "I know"

Followed by:

"It's tingling"
"That means it's working"

Does that sound as funny reading it as it does in my head? Probably not, but I'm actually sitting here laughing maniacally just thinking about it.

And I'll say what we're both thinking - Helga from 'Hey Arnold!' is one of the greatest and most original characters to ever grace our tv screens. At least, I hope that's what we're both thinking otherwise this war of 'who is the more geeky?' just took another twist and I'm back on top. Blast!

I wonder why, when posting a reply to you, I seem to think I'm getting gradually insane the more I write.

More random films:

Ronin (De Niro, Reno, Skarsgard, Bean - obviously Sean, not Mr. - best action film line-up of the 90s)

Day of the Jackal - I wish I was as meticulous as Edward Fox.

I knew you wouldn't let me get away with the 'x'. Quite right, too. "X" is for far too many things (wrong answers, buried treasure, poison, being marked for death, etc.) But thank you for knowledging me up - it sustains me.

I really should get my day started.

Is it kind of wrong that I should like slumpy Lilly?

Dex said...

without hesitation or remorse

Life is very sad sometimes. I hope you're feeling okay?

I know I can seem a bit facetious, but that's not me.

:)

And calling my fellow islanders 'fucking morons' is a bit harsh, even by my standards.

Louise said...

You're so sweet to come back almost 5 hours later just to console me. You're fantastical and i'm very glad you're a fixture of my life right now.
And i'm alright, i just missed them so much last night. It's a little pathetic - not to me - but they were these little living things that i loved more than i've probably loved any human, outside my family.
My Misty, the last we lost, was by my side every single day i was going through hell. My little partner in crime she was and it's rough not having her around. I used to feed her using chopsticks. She was awesome. Lord help me when i lose someone i love as much as i loved my cats
Ugh, i hate when i get like this. I sound like a cat lady but meh, bring it on, i'll be the cat lady of Blairgowrie. Actually no, not Blair, i don't intend to be here forever but people will come from miles around just to see my wondrous collection of felines wherever i hang my hat and i love hats.
I'm only half serious. Definitely half...

Now, onto business:

I've heard of kissing cousins but i don't agree with it.
Kiss, Cuddle and Torture, however. Now that's epic.
I don't like to be greeted with a kiss from anyone other than my at-the-time boyfriend. It's too personal an act to throw away as a greeting and i like my space. Gimme a hug, that's fine but do not in any form try to infect me with your cooties. Mouth kissers are the worst!
Aw, i sound insane. Like that's new.
You know what i hate just as much though? Weak hugs. Ucccchhh! If you're going to hug me, give me a good old squishing. I hate it when people hug like you've got the plague, just don't do it at all then!

The Forms of Hugs I Enjoy:

Bear hugs
Glomping (http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lpdmjp7xrW1qgdxoz.gif) In case you don't know glomping is.
Lifting hugs.
Spinning hugs.
Hugs that last far too long and it doesn't become uncomfortable.
Bed hugs.
Surprise attack hugs (different from glomping because someone sneaks up behind you)

There's more, i'm sure. Hugs are just good. Yessum.
I'd hug you for all the quotes you're leaving me. Don't ever apologise for an excessive use of movie quotes, i come from a family of quoters, you'd fit right in!
My dad is amazing at it. Seconds before it happens on screen he'll say the line and he forgets movies the second they're done practically. He's the devil.

Plus, how great is that moment with Alan Rickman? You'd really do as you were told, wouldn't you?
You've seen Dogma right? Rickman as The Metatron? Oh goodness he was perfection. My life goal is to be as surly as AR. I kid you not.

I started this hours ago but i had to run away to see my grandparents and get my daily feeding.
So hello again Dex :)
Whenever i say your 'name' i think of three things:

Dexy's Midnight Runners
Dexter (hopefully you're not a knife-happy skitzo. although you do compare yourself to Patrick Bateman...hmm)
and
Dexter's Lab

Shall we have a laboratory? I'm thinking yes. Are you good at science? I'm not. But we could attempt to make our very own Kelly LeBrock! Have you see her these days? Woah. All i'll say.

Louise said...

Dexterous the Victriolic Epistolean!
You'll go down in history.
Swears it.
Oh! That'll be our crime fighting duo! Dexterous the Vitriolic Epistolean and the Fanged Lilliputian.
Okay, my name isn't that great but who cares, we've got sleepwalking crime to fight!

And please. How could you ever question my love for Michael Keaton? I thought better of you Dex. The man's a quick-witted god!
I might adore him...just a tad.
Even when he cameos, it's the just best.
Did you know he's going to be in the remake of RoboCop?
That makes me love him more.
And he's Porco Rosso! And Dogberry in Much Ado. I wonder how Nathan Fillion will hold up in comparison...
Have you ever seen The Paper? It's one of my favourites. Not full out mental Keaton but enough of that tone in his voice and almost smirk to let you know he could lose it at any time.
Look what you started, my love knows no bounds!
And i totally agree with you on the Bateman/Keaton front. Bale was magnificent in American Psycho, that bit where he starts to gnaw on the prostitute's leg before he whips out the chainsaw. Magnificent. There is no other word. And the tension between Bale and Chloe Sevigny, killer, if you'll excuse the pun.
Dex, you keep reminding me of things i love. You are stellar and i thank you. Guess what i'll be watching asap.

Do you say asap or spell out the letters? I hope it's the latter because people who say asap deserve a punch in the forehead.

Hmm. Eclectic taste in films eh? I feel i've been insulted somehow...
You wouldn't be the first though. I hand over my Christmas/Birthday list each year and my family kind of give me this look of, 'what are you?'. I lack filmic consistency. I can go happily from Buffalo 66 to Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead.
I don't know why but feel free to judge me.

So, you don't plan on keeping it in the family up there in the Shetlands then? I think that's probably wise. Marry outwith, have normal looking babies, don't create mutants aka. royalty. I'll never marry anyone from Blairgowrie. Bunch of brainless miscreants. We are horrible people...

Dog Day Afternoon - nope, never seen, i should probably correct that, right? There's too many movies, i want to see them all but it's impossible. Im-poss-ible. I don't know why i do that.
I'd like to have the kind of life where i could spend it watching all the right movies, listen to the best music and read the most wonderful of books with someone who can share and introduce me to everything i don't know i want yet. And not feel bad about it. Is that lazy and selfish?

My insanity is rubbing off on you, run away. Run away nowww.
But remember slumpy Lilly fondly, in some far off land but take comfort in the fact that you are safe and no longer on the verge of a nervous fucking breakdown at my hands.
So long, farewell, thanks for all the quotes!

One more thing:

Ronin's said to have the best car chase scene in movie history. PSSSSSHHHHT! I love car chases and that was nowhere near the best.
You hate me now, don't you?
This is coming from a girl who regards the reverse car scene with Megan Fox and Bumblebee in the first Transformers as a thing of car chasey beauty, though. Not sure i'm to be trusted...

Louise said...

I forgot to ask you a really rather important question...


Mallrats or Clerks?

Over and out.

Dex said...

Whatever happened to your Inigo Montoya table top?

Since we were talking of the letter x and kissing cousins, I, of course, had to revisit Letterland. This is how I remember them:

A - Annie Apple
B - Bouncy Ben
C - Clever Cat
D - Dippy Duck
E - Eddie Elephant
F - Fireman Fred
G - Golden Girl
H - Hairy Hat Man
I - Impy Ink
J - Jumping Jim
K - Kicking King
L - Lucy Lamp Lady
M - Munching Mike
N - Naughty Nick
O - Oscar Orange
P - Poor Peter
Q - Quarrelsome Queen
R - Robber Red
S - Sammy Snake
T - Ticking Tom (then Tess)
U - Uppy Umbrella
V - Vase of Violets
W - Wicked Water Witch
X - Kissing Cousins (Max & Maxine)
Y - Yellow Yo-Yo Man
Z - Zig-Zag Zebra

I don't know why I felt the need to write all that down. I'm having a slow morning. I'm actually in the admin office at Mareel. I'm just going to print our list of films. Back asap :)

Right, now I'm going to purchase a hot chocolate. They have a cafe in Mareel and they do a really good hot chocolate. People always complain about the service and the lack of choice, but I only ever get a hot chocolate (occasionally a chocolate croissant) and only when it's really quiet. I don't queue. For 99% of things, if I have to queue, it's not worth it. Lack of queues, one advantage that island living has over the city. But it was okay in Starbucks at 8am. Actually, I'm going to see if Mareel do chai lattes. Probably not.

Just so you know, I never say asap in real life. Mainly because it's never going to happen. I don't do things asap.

Rutger Hauer - don't you just love saying his name. Do you remember him as Vortigern in a Merlin adaptation? And 'The Hitcher'. I really like that film, but I'm not that keen on watching lovely waitress Nash being torn apart by a truck. At least she returned to terrorise Bridget Fonda and shoot Stephen Tobolowsky in the head through a pillow. Plus, how great is Mr. Tobolowsky in Groundhog Day? Bing!

Aw Lilly, thank you for the Camera Obscura song. 'James' is just lovely, particularly the opening fade-in. I really have to start honouring my promise about Rumours.

I quite like helping out at a cinema, even if I just spent most of my morning writing this comment.

Dex said...

I didn't know Ronin was supposed to have the greatest car chase of all time. So, no, I don't hate you. I just love to see Mr. De Niro and Mr. Reno getting along so well, and Stellan Skarsgard being a cold-hearted bastard. Not quite sure what I make of Jonathan Pryce's Irish accent.

What is the greatest car chase in film history?

I know it's not a car chase, but Gromit trying to catch the evil penguin from 'The Wrong Trousers' is action cinema at its finest.

Hah, actor's crying faces. Here's one of my favourites - teacher Dave from the film Election blubbing his way through the line "we're in love".

I have a confession to make. Please promise you won't hate me. I have never seen a film directed by Kevin Smith. Are you still going to talk to me? In fact, I did once see 5 minutes of Mallrats - enough to be amazed at how young Ben Affleck looked and just long enough to quickly change channel once I saw Michael Rooker. That guy gives me the creeps.

But I'd give it another go. I love your taste in films, but I just know I'm going to get the 'what are you?' look when I hand over our list. But I'm used to those looks, so what the hell. Eclectic is good.

I have seen 'The Paper' though. Am I somewhat redeemed in your eyes.

Did you know Friar Tuck (Mike McShane) from Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves used to a regular on WLIIA? Damned talented he was too.

Are you learning to drive? I'm very slow at picking up on these things. My cousin (not from Shetland, but a land far, far away, let me make that clear, although she lives in Aberdeen now) passed her test the other day first time. It took me 4 (5 if you include the car battery going flat while waiting in the test centre).

Do you remember a while back you asked me what I used to climb on as a child since we have very few trees in Shetland. Well, I live at the foot of a hill (Staney Hill). Different sort of climbing, but climbing nonetheless. Also Clickimin Broch (something built by Picts).

At work last week, we actually had something delivered to us from Blairgowrie. A company called JAG Enterprises sent us vision cards. Small world.

American Psycho and Malcolm In The Middle share one thing in common. Hilarious usage of the song Sussudio. Remember I said I identified with Patrick Bateman, well it doesn't quite extend to his taste in music.

I'm going home now!

Louise said...

For some reason your reply made me hungry. No idea what that's about.

You're going to judge me because i'm totally on board with Bateman and Collins. The man was in Genesis, has one epic voice and was the origin of the stupendous Cadbury's drumming gorilla advert.
If that doesn't deserve love, then i don't know what does.
I even quite like his offspring. She was quietly likeable in The Blind Side. I love sports movies. Except ones with Adam Sandler in them. Actually, anything with Adam Sandler in, bar The Wedding Singer. I can't even bring myself to watch Hotel Transylvania, though i really want to, purely because he's involved. For shame Mister Sandler, for shame!

After saying that in my head, i immediately thought of the new Lincoln movie...which i can't be bothered seeing. Do you ever wonder what the hell your brain is playing at?

I'm so freaking happy you like The Hitcher, it's one of my all-time-could-never-stop-loving movies. I had the biggest crush on C. Thomas Howell for the longest time because of The Hitcher. But i was okay with Miss Leigh getting torn in two. She's far too creepy for her own good sometimes. She does get props for Fast Times At Ridgemont High though.

Have you seen the remake of The Hitcher? Ugh. Does Sean Bean (always call him Sean Bon in my head) only play psychotic jerks these days? Except for Eddard Stark of course. Poor Ned.
They trade places in the car scene, y'know? Sophia Bush is the one in the car and her non-entity boyfriend is tied between the two trucks. He gets ripped apart quite graphically unlike the original. It was awesome. The only awesome part of that shame of a remake but i seem to recall there's a really good noise when he gets maimed. Am i a sick puppy? I'm starting to wonder.

Two things i love Rutger Hauer for:

Ladyhawke
and
The 10th Kingdom

I should be put in a nerdy hall of shame.
I also really love him the Buffy movie. Piece of crap that it is. He's just hams it up so stunningly as Lothos.

It upsets me to see Tobolowsky in Glee. He's so much better than that. Bing! indeed!
I enjoyed Glee when it first appeared. It had so much potential to be this surreal, twisted little show but no, they just had to schmaltz it up and make me want to ralph every episode.
Ugh, Mister Schuester. Ughhhhhh! Worst teacher in the history or worst teachers. Tell me i'm wrong. I'd even rather Kurt Dussander as my educator and he was one scary, nazi-loving scumwad.
Brad Renfro - what a silly little creature. Like River Phoenix all over again.

A movie i'll watch without fail: The Client. Sarandon kicks lawyering ass in that movie.

Not to mention Ghost World, Sleeper and Bully, the latter of which has my one true love, Nick Stahl in it - don't know why he's my one true love but he is, the heart wants what the heart wants!
Have you ever seen Carnivale?

I could so keep going with this little tangent...
You wouldn't mind though, would you?

Louise said...

Dex, watch Mallrats. For the love of all that is nerdy and wonderful, watch Mallrats and Dogma and Chasing Amy and Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.
Actually this isn't a request. I am straight out telling you to watch these movies. Do it or no biting...ever!

That means you've never seen the chocolate-covered pretzel scene - a scene which has had no effect on my love of swallowing down CCP whatsoever. You'll understand why that's wrong once you've seen it.
Michael Rooker in The Walking Dead - brrr.
I cannot wait for certain people i hate to die in that show! They deserve it so much, especially the pious ones. Yuck.
Apparently season 3 is meant to be properly amazing but i haven't seen it yet. Have you?

JAG Enterprises? Never heard of them but to be fair, i don't spend that much time investigating our local businesses. Except my Dad's Optometrists. If you ever need your eyes tested, i fully suggest you make the epic journey just to see my Dad. Best optom in the land. I need to get my eyes tested actually, so i can actually wear the glasses i've chosen out already...I might routinely go round our practice trying on all the spectacles...for funzies. I like the old men specs the best. They give me that Daria edge.
Fuck, i loved Daria!

Like the previous message, i've been at this for a very long time. I've been fed, watered, entertained and now i'm back and i've lost my train of thought.
Bugger.

What's it like working in a cinema m'dear? I've always wondered. What are the perks?
I miss the cinema. There's a really nice one in Dundee at the DCA. I used to get uni lectures in there sometimes and there was no way i could stay awake. Dim lighting, the comfiest cinema seats you could possibly find and a boring lecturer droning on about 18th century art. Yeah, that equals sleep.

Dex, it's bumming me out that you live in the Shetlands. Stop it.
Although, Clickimin Broch does look mighty fun to climb on and awfully pretty at night!

http://www.wanderlust.co.uk/mywanderlust/members/funkyaden/photos/clickimin-broch_18154/70288

Does it really look like that or have i been lied to?

When i was just a wee Lilly, i climbed the tree right outside my house. Even though my house is surrounded by trees they weren't very climbable but this one, literally 2 minutes from my back door had a little nook in the heart of it that i would sit in and sturdy branches for swinging from. It was next to a big field that they have no covered in suburbia. I miss my fucking field. I swear a lot...by the way. My first day in Blairgowrie - moved from Ellon in Aberdeen, like the cousin you won't be marrying! Hee, sorry - i fell flat on my face in a patch of nettles in that field. I don't remember it obviously but i apparently howled from the nettle stings i was covered in. Ah, memories.
This is why i'm scared to learn how to do things, like drive. I haven't even got my provisional yet because i'm positive the first thing i'll do is crash and die. I fall over my own feet Dex, what are the chances i could handle a potentially life ending machine?
I will do it some day though. Hopefully sooner rather than later, cause the bus sucks and that's the only way to leave my godforsaken town.

This is an odd question but what kind of window do you have in your bedroom and what does it look out upon?
I'm not some weird window pervert, i promise, i just wonder what kinda view you look out at everyday.

Hope you're home and safe dexterous one! Have you been snowed on? We've been pelted and now it's all gone. Sadness.

Louise said...

I almost forgot. My Inigo Montoya desktop is resting happily against my actual desk in my bedroom. I could never get rid of it. Never!

Also:

Ricky Gervais is taking Jason Segel's place in the next Muppets movie...i might cry.

Louise said...

There's so many mistakes in my reply that it's making me sad... :(

Dex said...

Oh Lilly, don't be sad. I love that you care about these little things but that's all they are - little things.

Hopefully, here's something to make you smile ever so slightly:

I had Cadbury's chocolate covered pretzels for lunch today. They sell them at Mareel.

And that was the bit I saw from Mallrats.

I like that we're friends :)

Louise said...

Dude, now i've got One Direction in my head...how could you?...

I can't get away with 'dude', even in text.

So, chocolate-ass-pretzels had no effect on you either?
Perhaps i should be worried for our brains...
They're so good though! Regular chocolate pretzels, that is...

I'm going to virtually glomp you, because i like that we're friends too :)

Dex said...

I suppose Clickimin Broch does look like that. Hardly any snow this year, though. Pity. There's a road (Stanley Hill Rd according to Google Maps, but I never called it that) that goes up the hill, one of those roads that you wouldn't think was a road until you saw a car trundling down it, where I used to go sledging. I had this old sled that was really just a red piece of plastic with a bit of blue rope attached to it. I loved it very much and it incredibly fast for some unexplained reason. Once we set off, I seemed to have no control over it whatsoever, except when steering into a ditch at the side of the road (it was the only way I could stop).

Unfortunately, I don't have much of a view from my bedroom window. I'm at the back of our house, and we have a clump of completely unclimbable pine trees growing in our back garden. So I live very much in the shadows. Beyond the trees, there's a fence and then my neighbours' garden. Actually I say my neighbours, but they live in a completely different street (Andrewstown Brae as opposed to Westerloch Brae). They're parallel to each other.

There's a much nicer view from my parents' weekend cottage in Sandness, which is out in the country on the westside of Shetland. It looks out onto Norby Loch and then further on there's the island of Papa Stour (an interesting place where all the residents seem to hate each other, but it looks lovely from a distance). And on summer evenings you can watch the sunset along the horizon. It makes me sad that I haven't been there in years. It's really difficult to get to if you can't drive. You have to get a bus to Walls, and then it's a 6 mile walk along a winding road.

I hope I'm not boring you with my local geography. I'm having a slightly melancholic morning. That video for 'Shyness' really does make me think about those years long gone by. As does that speech by Roy Batty:

All those moments will be lost in time... like tears in rain...

I know you blogged it the other day, but I never get tired of that scene. I sometimes feel I haven't lived.

I would never have learned to drive if I hadn't been pushed into doing it. My family are like that sometimes. I just never seem to get started on my own. I hated learning, absolutely hated it and it caused me serious emotional trauma (failing so many times to add to all my other failures), but once it's over, it's over and that's it. For most people, it's something you never have to worry about again. It's just a shame you can't drive a car out of Shetland. I hate that we're separated from each other by the North Sea.

Oh well, maybe I can drive to Sandness and watch the sunset.

I apologise for being so 'maudlin' this morning. But it really doesn't take much to cheer me up.

PS - I can just picture you sitting in the nook of a tree :)

Dex said...

Do you like Phil Collins? I've been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Oh well, we all have our guilty pleasures - Cyndi Lauper(don't look at me that way, Lilly).

I saw the trailer for Lincoln when I went to see Django Unchained. I was amazed, bewildered, fascinated, shocked and excited...by what was going on with Tommy Lee Jones' hair. I'm only used to slicked back TLJ.

The Client - very confusing after just talking about Chris Sarandon to move straight onto Susan.

Has watching 'Hitcher' ever made you inspect every plate of chips just that little bit closer?

You seem to have a lovely view from your bedroom window. Are you not entirely surrounded by suburbia, then? Is that 'Coffin Way' you look out onto?

Clucking Bell! I can't believe I shot a 'One Direction' laser beam straight into your head. I can only say that I meant it in a completely different way.

I love that you care about little things. As opposed to 'I love the little things about you'.

Which I suppose would be true as well. This is getting rather embarrassing. I used to think I was a world weary cynic. I wonder when I became so saccharine. Ugh.

Talking about being sickly sweet, one of the worst things about Shetland is that every bakery seems to use sweetened cream in their pastries. I have to buy all my pastries from the supermarket because of this.

Dude - The Big Lebowski and Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (I just frickin' love Joan of Arc from that film). Fighting the good fight to make the word dude socially acceptable. They didn't quite succeed. Fine films though.

Mentioning Transylvania Hotel reminded of my oddest character crush - Maggot from Zombie Hotel (I really am very odd).

What sitcoms did you watch when you were growing up? What do you watch now?

I'm a very curious person.

Louise said...

Oh, sweet jesus. My laptop just shut itself down and i was so fucking close to finishing my reply.

I'm seriously pissed off now.

I will reply later, right now i have to go and curse the day Apple was ever born.

Fuck, fuckety fuck.

Louise said...

Ok, so i'm back again.
And right now i'm taking every precaution to not lose this message by writing it in the 'create post' section of blogger because of the automatic save feature it possesses.
I will be doing this from now on because my computer is a word i can't say because my mother would disown me and i quite like being her kid.
Hi ho, it's off to work:

Do i sense a lift in your spirits since your last message m'dear? I do hope so. You're someone i truly believe never deserves to be struck down with melancholia.
But just in case i'm wrong:

http://youtu.be/NVdeFdUQ0rM

I hope it brings you the same amount of cheer it does me. Is it 'me' or 'I' there? God, i can't tell anymore.
I think i'm starting to overthink my overthinking. Help me...

What's it like living next to so much water? Great expanses of water? I've never done it. The most water i have in Blair is the River Ericht, which i adore. Many a Summer was spent trudging along its lengths, climbing the big boulders that stood in the middle of the flow and crossing the old, somewhat rickety-feeling bridge that takes you over to the adjoining town, Rattray. I saw a bright green beetle on that bridge one summer. I remember it distinctly. It was horribly hot and i was with my best friend, he lived in Rattray then and we were going to his house for sanctuary from the sun and as we were crossing the bridge i saw it. Decently sized, pearlescent whilst changing it's colour from green to purple in the light and sitting quite happily on the railings while i studied it quite intently. It flew away once its vanity could take no more of my admiration. Bugs are neat. Except for the crazy, yellow and black thing - not a bee or wasp before you question my observational skills - that basically head-butted its way through the small crack of my snibbed window into my room one year.
For such a tiny little creature, it scared the crap out of me. It was hot, really hot and i was not opening my window for anything after i got rid of it. Nuh uh. Do you get bullied by gigantic moths in the Summer? I do and i don't like it. I stay up so late they can't help but be attracted to the light coming from my room and the inviting open window. Little bastards. If they could just fly straight and not dive-bomb me, i'd be fine with them coming and going. Same goes for Daddy Long-legs. Fly straight or go home.

After that little bug-hating rant, if you're still interested...i think you should invest in getting one of those submarine/car thingies that Richard Armitage - why is he Thorin? Why? - had in the Captain America movie, that he failed so miserably to escape in.
That way you could visit whenever you wished and you wouldn't even have to go through Scotland, you could just skirt around the edge, slip into The Tay and then bam! pop up in the Ericht where i shall be waiting with a plethora of guilty-pleasure movies and chocolate covered pretzels.
Why haven't they got around to making these things yet? It's like teleportation. If James T. Kirk can do it then we should be able to by now, shouldn't we?
I love Shatner. Do you love Shatner? He was so rubbish and them because so supremely awesome.
You have born witness to his cover of Pulp's, 'Common People' right?
Right?!
It's legendary. I loved it when he showed up in Third Rock From The Sun - an example of a show i grew up watching. I just want him to give me a hug and tell me stories about all of his trekkie conquests.
That's not healthy, is it?
I don't care!
Shatner for President!

Louise said...

So, your parents have a weekend cottage...that's enviable! I'd settle for a treehouse. But no ordinary treehouse, oh no. It'd have different levels and be impenetrable. Or this one would do:

http://pinterest.com/pin/32721534762102164/

Y'know, i'd sit in the nook of that tree even to this day if i could. It's still there and everything but it's for the new generation of tiny people that live in my area now. It wouldn't be right for a surly 25 year old to take it hostage for daily reading purposes. Or would it...

Do we overuse the ellipsis? I think perhaps we do, i definitely do at least. It's so damn useful though and who doesn't enjoy a sentence that trails off into the ether...

Are we too nice to each other? Have we become those people? The people you want to hit because they're so...nice. Shall we start trading insults?
I could use the Instant Shakespeare Insult Kit on you, see if we can regain some of our enduring cynicism?

You ruttish, hedge-born apple-john!

I looked up apple-john. In full, i just called you a sexually excited deer whom was born in a hedge and resemble a withering apple.
I'm so sorry...
Make your insult a good one, i deserve it.
To make it up to you, i'll let you know something...i like Cyndi Lauper too. Time After Time - can't get any better.
It appears in one of the best movies ever: Strictly Ballroom. When Baz Luhrmann still knew how to make movies.
I don't know if i want to see The Great Gatsby, i've never had any desire to read the book so i can't see much point in putting myself through the film. I do like DiCaprio though. His best performance ever? What's Eating Gilbert Grape? Hands down.
I miss when Johnny Depp could still act. I really do. I can just feel it in my bones that The Lone Ranger is going to be awful and that's a shame because i like Armie Hammer. He did a great job in The Social Network, i can't imagine it's easy to play your non-existent twin talking to yourself.

I've still got One Direction in my head, y'know? There will be vengeance for this.
What upsets me the most is that i know the words. Jesus.

Louise said...

Ever seen In The Valley of Elah? TLJ does a stellar job in that. I'd been so used to him being the offbeat, kinda psychotic nice guy with a temper...i wasn't expecting him to act...
The Valley of Elah's a real place y'know? In Judah, Israel. It's said to be the place where David defeated Goliath. I find that neat. Even like the way it sounds. El-ah.
I'm not a religious nut by the way, yeah, i almost went to university to study it but i soooo don't believe in some grand creator in the heavens. But i also don't not believe. I guess you could call me an agnostic with atheistic tendencies. It's the not knowing of it all that keeps me somewhere in the middle. Nobody can give me solid evidence that there is or isn't a god, that were created by an explosion and the subsequent combining of atoms, cells, what-have-you. I can't pick a side until i know the truth and that's not coming anytime soon or even at all.
I'll be quiet now.
Hinduism was my favourite to study. Dharma and Samsara are lovely concepts. And Ganesha is a badass.
Now i'll be quiet.
Do i say 'badass' too much?

Tell me more about you Dexterous. I feel lacking in my knowledge of my new found playmate.

Until then however, i shall compile you a two lists.

What I Grew Up Watching:

My So-Called Life
Party of Five
Friends (because everyone did)
Popular
Boy Meets World
Buffy
Goosebumps
3rd Rock from the Sun of course
Dawson's Creek (Pacey Witter is my dream man, i will not be judged)
ER
The Secret Life of Us
This Life
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (do you still know all the words? I do)
The Cosby Show
Home Improvement (Buzz Lightyear!)
Married With Children
Lovejoy
Frasier
Cheers
Dharma & Greg (i was young...okay i'll watch anything, which explains Revenge...)
Roswell High
Angel
Spin City
Ally McBeal
Sports Night
Saved By The Bell (i almost forgot that. Zack Morris, the boy who could stop time. Epic. Screech is a porn star, wtf?)
Blossom
Mad About You
The New Adventures of Superman
Due South!!! <- you're only supposed to use on exclamation point. Ever. I'm going to punctuational hell.
Cybill
Suddenly Susan (Judd Nelson, my boy)
Sabrina, the Teenage Witch
Clarissa Explains It All
Eerie Indiana
...there's more but this is getting embarrassing. Onto the present!

Louise said...

What I Watch Now:

Breaking Bad
The Walking Dead
Homeland
True Blood
A Town Called Eureka
Fresh Meat
Dead Like Me (MANDY PATINKIN!)
Pushing Daisies (how could hey cancel this?)
The Gilmore Girls (always and forever will i want to be Lorelei Gilmore)
Dexter
Misfits
HIMYM
Skins (before it was dire)
Supernatural (undying love)
Green Wing
Black Books
Spaced
Coupling
Carnivale
The Fades (only one series, sadness)
Justified
Battlestar Galactica
Friday Night Lights
The Borgias
Nurse Jackie
The Big C
Six Feet Under
The Killing (Forbrydelsen, not that american crap)
The Walking Dead
30 Rock (i just started but oh goodness it's amazing)
Awkward
The Bitch in Apartment 23 (which they have now cancelled! Where will Van Der Beek go now?)
Bob's Burgers
Community
Archer
Game of Thrones (less than a month to go, i'm giddy with anticipation)
It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia
New Girl
Once Upon A Time
Wilfred
Pan Am (so insane it's wonderful)
and very soon i'll be delving for the first time into Deadwood, Treme, Boardwalk Empire, Jericho, Rescue Me, Falling Skies and whatever else i can get my grubby mitts on.

I love tv. Does it show? No wonder i'm so pale.

I pose the same question to you dearest one. And be honest. I only missed out a few seriously shameful things i watch...definitely just a few.

I've never seen or heard of Hotel Transylvania...but for the last 5 minutes i've been learning and then singing along to the theme tune. Love you for this. I must find more!
And Maggot's pretty cute, so i wouldn't worry.

One last thing before i go and drink copious amounts of tea:

I feel like i haven't lived either but i'm sure we will, just maybe a little later than everyone else. Maybe we'll do some of that living together. If not, we'll tell each other all about it. Dex and Lilly, the terrible twosome. Somewhat like Maggot and Fungus! Except not related. Wow, incest always seem to creep it's way back into these conversations. I'm officially worried.

I salute thee.

Dex said...

Jam, jam, jam

I really do like you very much.

To sleep and 'The Adventures of Dexterous the Vitriolic Epistolean and the Fanged Lilliputian'.

I'm sure you'll join me several hours later :)

Dex said...

Hi Lilly - I'm actually typing this in my lunch hour at work (crisps, chocolate and sweets. I should be ashamed of myself, but I'm not), so apologies in advance if it ends abruptly. It'll be continued when I reach my sanctum sanctorum. Do you remember Dr. Strange? I used to be a total comic book geek. I wonder when they'll get around to a film adaptation. Who could play him? I'll need to think about that.

You can't swim in the sea around Shetland. Or, at least, I can't. It's just too cold. The only advantage I can think of, being surrounded by so much water, is that is seems like bad things can't reach us so easily. But, I suppose the flip side is you can't easily escape the bad things that are here already. And there are no rivers in Shetland. In Sandness, there is a stream that leads down to the sea where I once saw an otter that I managed to stalk for a little while. I've lived in Shetland for the best part of 26 years and it's the only time I've seen one.

Do you still spend your summers by the river? It sounds like something from an Ingmar Bergman film (the films about idyllic summers, not playing chess with Death).

Dick Solomon - legend.

Politician: "I want to take money out of the drug dealers pocket and give it back to the people".

Dick Solomon: "I want some of that drug money".

Don't you wish Tim Burton was making the films he is now, 20 years ago. I reckon if he had been given 'Alice in Wonderland' or 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory' during the late 80s/early 90s, he could have made something really wonderful. Beetlejuice, Batman and Batman Returns are...well, Michael Keaton and Tim Burton, classic combination.

I'll tell you a Michael Keaton film that I've never seen, but really want to - 'Night Shift'. Actually, I don't think I've ever seen pre-Beetlejuice Michael Keaton.

The original series of 'The Killing' is the last television series to really hook me. That's not to say that I haven't enjoyed anything since, but being mentally hooked to a series is something that rarely happens to me these days. And I wasn't even left feeling disappointed at the end of it all. Even rarer. Have you ever seen the Swedish version of Wallander (actually, there's been a couple)? It's good, but a bit depressing and I still feel a little bit sad when I think of Johanna Sallstrom.

I used to be really good at insulting people. A school friend I sat next to for a year in French kept a folder where he'd written all the insults I'd hurled at him in that class. I saw him for the first time since school about a year ago, and it was just about the first thing he mentioned. Just to let you know what you're up against.

But you don't actually like the One Direction song, do you? It was on the radio at work one day, and have you ever had one of those moments where you're on the verge of expressing a strong opinion about something, only for the person next to you to express exactly the opposite to what you were thinking?

Dex said...

Did you know Uncle Phil from 'The Fresh Prince of Bel Air' voiced Shredder in the original 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles' cartoon? I was so excited to learn that fact.

I haven't thought about 'The Cramp Twins' in years. I was so happy to be able to recall their names, just like that. Actually, at first, I thought it was Wayne and Lucius, rather than Lucien, but I was still inordinately pleased with myself.

Do you remember Johnny Bravo? And Mighty Max (featuring Tim Curry as the voice of Skullmaster)? Plus, how fantastic was the opening theme tune to X-Men: The Animated Series. I'll tell you how fantastic. Very fantastic indeed.

I'm stuggling to think of tv series that aren't on your list. And just so you know that I'm not avoiding the question in order to hide my embarrassment, I'll give you something so embarrassing and cringeworthy that anything that comes after it will look good in comparison.

I watched 'Sister, Sister'. There, I said it. Feel free to judge me all you like. I distinctly remember watching the first episode, then watching some more. I'm still ashamed. And 'Kenan & Kel'.

Here's a couple more I just thought of (and which I feel less ashamed about):

The Demon Headmaster
The Queen's Nose
Round The Twist

Mentioning Mighty Max reminded me that Tim Curry voiced Skullmaster, which in turn reminded me that Tim Curry voiced Nigel Thornberry in 'The Wild Thornberries', which in turn reminded me of the cartoon 'Jumanji', which in turn reminded me of the film 'Jumanji', which in turn reminded me of Jonathan Hyde who played Van Pelt, which then reminded me of the film 'Richie Rich' in which Jonathan Hyde played Cadbury the butler and which starred Macaulay Culkin, which reminded me of Home Alone 2: Lost in New York which reminded me of Tim Curry and brought me full circle back to Mighty Max.

I'll tell you another shameful secret - I prefer Home Alone 2 to the first film. Probably has something to do with Tim Curry getting slapped in the face by Catharine O'Hara, followed by a quivering lip and "do bundle up, it's rather chilly outside". Plus, Pesci & Stern get brutalised in far more satisfying ways than in the first one ("that was the sound of a tool chest, coming down the stairs".)

I haven't even mentioned the gangster film scene - "you've been smooching with everyone". Poor Cliff ("it's a lie").

And Jumanji is another film I try not to miss when it's on tv. For some reason, I just think Van Pelt is so cool. The same way I think Robert Muldoon ("clever girl") from Jurassic Park is so cool. It took me ages to realise that Van Pelt and Alan's father were the same person.

Also 'Clue' with Tim Curry, Christopher Lloyd, one of the guys from Spinal Tap, and Colleen Camp who was in 'Die Hard with a Vengeance'.

Do you remember that scene from Spaced when Duane Benzie get 'Muldooned' by a pack of teenagers? - "clever boys".

Reading back, I really should think a bit more before I write things down.

Dex said...

Lilly, what do you do most days?

You see, today I was at work, feeling very bored, and I just found myself wondering what you were doing. I find myself doing that quite often these days.

We really should be having adventures together.

I don't know what kinds of things you'd like to know about me. You can ask me anything :) I sometimes forget there's more to life than music and films, as wonderful as those things are.

And completely disregarding my last sentence, are you looking forward to 'A Good Day to Die Hard'?

And Wes Anderson films. Yay or nay.

Louise said...

To begin with, some info concerning Dr Strange:

http://www.themovies.co.za/2012/09/10/rumour-is-doctor-strange-going-to-have-a-major-role-in-thor-the-dark-world-and-which-big-name-actor-would-play-him/

Could be interesting...
Although, to be honest i'm not really that up on my knowledge about the strange one. I love comics, i do but i lack the dedication to really get involved. I only have one complete series of comics and that's Joss Whedon's, 'Fray', which i will not hear a bad word against because it is beyond fantastic.

How do you feel about the latest ventures in comic book adaptations? Like Thor, Captain America, Iron Man, Batman, The Avengers, you know the rest?
I'd be interested to hear from a 'former comic book geek' :)
That's not mocking by the way, i love your kind. Do you have Forbidden Planet in the Shetlands? Probably not. It's heavenly but smells quite strongly of unwashed boy. You don't smell of unwashed boy, do you Dex? It doesn't run me out the store or anything but why don't these boys wash?! I'm being mean to my nerdy people. I shall be quiet and scold myself inwardly.

I must talk a little more though, seeing as you basically said the exact thing i've though every time i've watched anything Tim Burton has created lately. Did you see Dark Shadows? That hurt, it really did. Not to mention Sweeney Todd and The Corpse Bride. It's making me sad, Dex. The man who created such wonders as The Nightmare Before Christmas, Mars Attacks!, Sleepy Hollow, Big Fish and the ones you mentioned previously...how could he singlehandedly destroy any charisma Johnny Depp possessed and ruin a story i hold extremely dear to my heart, so much so that i illustrated my own version of it - Alice, by the way.
Breaks my heart and i can't watch Frankenweenie. It'll be too upsetting, so, can you do it for me and tell me if some of the Burton i know and love is anywhere in sight again? Please Dexterous one, please, oh, please?

Night Shift sounds...amazing. Henry Winkler, Keaton, Shelley Long and directed by Ron Howard. Yes, yes please. I have a soft spot for Long because of The Money Pit and Cheers. And Ron Howard for American Graffiti, A Beautiful Mind, Edtv, THE PAPER :), Parenthood, Willow and Splash and being Richie 'almighty' Cunningham! I think his successes outweigh his failures, ahem, The Da Vinci Code, ahem.
Speaking of which, i just watched the trailer for Atlas Cloud and previously i have no interest at all...now i want to read it and see it as soon as is humanly possible...and i don't even really like Halle Berry. Hmm. Brainwashed by trailers, that happens a lot.
Don't you just love Tom Hanks, i mean early Tom Hanks with a few later exceptions - Toy Story, The Terminal, Catch Me If You Can, Road To Perdition (god, i love that movie), That Thing You Do! and so on.
He's just got something. 'Big' will remain my favourite of his movies. Forever and always. It's just so perfect. Who else can play a kid like that? The giant piano mat scene. Need i say more?
And then there's The 'Burbs, A League of Their Own, Sleepless in Seattle, Saving Private Ryan, The Green Mile and Castaway!

Do i just write you lists of movies? I think i do. Damn. Is it annoying? I just get really excited about this stuff...

Louise said...

I dare you to insult me. Something really nasty, oh masterful one.

I don't spend much time by the river anymore but i think i will try this year. It's really pretty when it's sunny out but we don't get otters. I've never seen an otter! Lucky duck. Did you know the collective noun for a group of otters is a bevy or if they're being playful, a romp?
Not as good as a parliament, clouder, murder or busyness but sweet all the same.
You have better facts than i do. Uncle Phil as Shredder? Really?! That's seriously amazing. I need more nerdy knowledge. Bestow upon me your wisdom m'love.

Seeing as though you told me something shameful (although i watched Sister, Sister too) i will return the favour with a current shameful pleasure of mine...The Vampire Diaries. I watch it obsessively, like a teenage emo in heat. it's ridiculous but y'know, vampires...can't help myself. Plus, i just kind of really like Ian Somerhalder, i dunno why. The first thing i remember seeing him as was Boone in Lost (which sucked, by the way) and really just finding him good. Turns out i'd seen him in stuff before, a crappy film i love in fact, Life As A House and The Rules of Attraction, which i didn't like so much. T'was before the Beek got his funny on, still so sad about The B in Apartment 23 :( Krysten Ritter better get more work and Liza Lapira! Have you seen Dollhouse?
I know what you're thinking and yes, i do worship the group Joss Whedon walks on. I wish he would give me a job so i could follow him around all day and learn to be as awesome as he is. Maybe make him the occasional cup of tea, get a hug off all my favourite characters, steal some props from the set...y'know, regular fangirl stuff.
I'd do the same with Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. Only together though and with Edgar, that's a must.
I was obsessed with the song playing over the fight scene with Tim and Daisy, Blood Bubble, by The Bluetones, you know the one? It was such a fine piece of tv, it's probably the reason why my sisters and i mime kill each other at least once a day.
Favourite instance of Mark Heap? I'm really torn between Statham and Brian. They're both so damaged and loveable.
I'm listing again, aren't i?

The Queen's Nose! I was obsessed and The Demon Headmaster just really scared me. I couldn't watch it.

Louise said...

Ugh, don't disown me but i don't like any of the Home Alone films, they're all so meh. I prefer teeny tiny Culkin in things like Uncle Buck. The Pagemaster though...i couldn't get enough of that. I might have to get that off amazon or more loyally raid hmv before it's shut down forever. There's gonna be maybe 2 left in Scotland. How sucky is that?

You've seen Scott Pilgrim, yeah? With his little brother Kieran? I like him the best. After Igby Goes Down i was pretty much sold. And Father of the Bride and err, She's All That...i kinda love that craptacular movie and it's got Freddie Prinze Jr. in it...how can that man be the father of Buffy's children? How?!

I really have to go to sleep now, my fingers hurt and the veins in my hands are becoming more prominent...I think i've typed too much today.

But a few more things.

You think of me? How frickin' nice. I never really imagined anyone thought of me. I'd squish you if there wasn't a few hundred miles between us.
I wish i could tell you i did lots of exciting things but really...i just potter about. I listen to spades of music, drink copious amounts of tea, converse with my siblings - offensively and kindly, i'll tidy stuff, procrastinate about things like drawing/researching/painting my effing room - i've had the paint since last July, christ. In the Summer i'm more prone to going outside, wandering around my garden which has been said to resemble The Shire, which is such a big compliment in mine and my mum's opinion. I read books on our deck in the sunshine, help out sometimes around the garden - i like the violent jobs, like cutting stuff down, not that i have the strength for it. The last time i helped cut down one of our trees i got such a bad rash i got sent away. Sensitive creature, it would seem. Uhh...i work part-time for my dad's optometrists as a clerical gofer and i design and make our window displays with my sister, that's fun.
See, i'm really pretty boring. I don't party, i don't drink, i don't go on adventures. I'm a homely creature. I hope that doesn't disappoint you.

Wes Anderson - There's a t shirt i want that has a list of all his movies on it. So, definitely yay. Not seen Moonrise Kingdom yet though. It's in the house i just don't want to spoil it by watching at the wrong time. Do you do that? Or is that a special kind of mentalness only i possess?

Brucey For Life!

Louise said...

Questions for Dex:

Do you have any siblings?
What was your school called?
What's your favourite childhood holiday memory?
Are you allergic to anything?
Got any pets?
Do you have any scars that tell an interesting or amusing story? I like scars. Little tale-tellers.
If you could be anything in the world, what would it be?
If you could be anywhere in the world, where would it be?
Are you disturbed by Coca Cola's Santa Clause?
To Marmite or not to Marmite?
Ever done that sickly thing called love? (ignore that if you wish, i'm just having a lull in question thinking)
Colour of your hair?
Are you good at keeping secrets?
Can you play any instruments?
Can you roll your tongue, click your fingers, whistle and purr? (very important question that one)
Dennis Leary or Bill Hicks?
Do you like the sound of a ticking clock?

Okay, i'm out, too sleepy for more.
Answer away m'dear!

Adieu.

Hah, i'm a ponce when i'm sleepy.
But not a Jazz Ponce!
Mighty Boosh, yay or nay?

Louise said...

'i do worship the group Joss Whedon walks on.'

There are many a mistake in this behemoth of a reply but this one in particular is making me chuckle. That may be because i've only had 4 hours sleep though...

Dex said...

I thought you meant his entourage :) Which kind of made sense in my head when I read it the first time, but that was at about 7am.

Don't you just love the way Brian Cox delivers the line "would you like to leave me your home phone number?"

"Did you know Tom Cruise had no idea he was in that vampire movie till two years later?". Possibly my favourite line from Bowfinger.

Louise said...

You first read that, 2 hours after i went sleep. That disturbs me.

'Hey, hey, hey. Who the heck ordered the blood shake? Hey, Ray, it's not Skip. It's Art. I'm just pretending to be Skip. Say, you didn't happen to see an ice pick around here, did you?'

Oh, Rick Ducommun.

Dex said...

Do I smell of unwashed boy? Well, I hope not. Today, I should be smelling of grapefruit and lemongrass. Hi, I'm Julian Clary.

To be honest, I was never that into comic books. I've read Watchmen, own the Claremont/Byrne run on X-Men, and occasionally fantasize about Magik from the New Mutants. Just like a normal person.

Forbidden Planet have come up to Shetland a few times and set up shop in the Clickimin leisure complex where you can peruse their wares in a large, airy environment. Thank fuck for that. Sorry guys.

Did you ever watch the tv series 'A Nero Wolfe Mystery' starring Timothy Hutton and Maury Chaykin?

And did you watch 'The Hunt For Tony Blair' starring that guy from Green Wing? It looked like my kind of thing and I missed it.

I think my favourite Mark Heap as Brian moment was when he was rehearsing his introduction in the mirror ("big fucking loser").

Did you really illustrate your own version of Alice? Wonderland or Looking Glass? For some reason, I love you so much right now.

Your window display is just too pretty for words. You and your sister are so damn talented.

Do you think we'll ever spend an idyllic summer together?

I'm sorry I haven't written so much today. It's not for want of trying. I just seem to be suffering from writer's block.

I'll try answering some questions.

I went to Sound Primary and then Anderson High.

I took piano lessons at school. Hated it.

I don't have any scars. I've never even broken a bone or been to the doctor for anything but a holiday jab. I did have braces.

If I could be anywhere in the world? With you (soppy, I know). I used to imagine I'd like to see Kyoto and Tokyo. I sometimes wonder if I'll ever see these places.

Bill Hicks.

I used to quite like Marmite on warm toast with butter.

I can't say I'm disturbed by the Coca Cola Santa. I mean, I've seen it and it doesn't haunt my dreams at night. I'm more disturbed by how much Coca Cola has influenced our modern perception of Santa. Actually, I just google imaged him. Yes. Yes, I am. Very much so. He looks like one of those fat jolly men from a Sherlock Holmes story, who's really evil and about to throw you to his mastiff.

I think the question about love can wait until another day (soon though). Valentine's day is coming up. Maybe that's the day to talk about love.

Mighty Boosh - definite yay.
William Shatner - He's been the murderer in 2 episodes of Columbo so definite yay.
The 'Burbs - definite yay.

Y'know, I'd watch anything you told me to watch. Never apologise or feel self-conscious about flooding your replies with as many film titles and recommendations as possible.

Actually, I'm on holiday from work until a week on Wednesday. Let's do some simultaneous movie watching.

Work is the only reason I get up so early. Well, that and insomnia. My sleeping pattern last night was really odd. 12am-1.30am, then 4am-6.30am. I can't believe we only overlapped 2 hours in sleep. No wonder crime statistics have risen. I wonder if a sleepwalking superhero has ever been done. We could write it, Lilly. Then sue the crap out of each other when our relationship sours. Always end on a happy note.

This probably contains so many spelling mistakes.

Dex said...

Actually, as I got towards the end of that last reply, I got my writing mojo back.

Just so you know, I love talking to you, and struggling to write has nothing to do the with that. It's just that I sometimes become acutely aware of how ridiculous I sound. Could you ever love someone so insecure? Do you ever read the stuff I write and quietly say "WTF" to yourself? It's okay if you do :)

I'll tell you something very geeky that I have in my possession. A bunch of Marvel Essentials, which are basically black and white reprints of 1960s Marvel comic books, complete with cheesy dialogue and unabashed sexism. So I have reprints of the first ever stories featuring Spider-Man, The Fantastic Four (The Invisible 'Girl' swooning over every man she comes across) & Dr. Strange. At least the artwork by Jack Kirby and Steve Ditko is still great. Not sure if I can see Aragorn as Dr. Strange (thanks for the link). Not sure if I can see anyone in that role. Perfect casting 20 years ago would have been Timothy Dalton. You need someone who can pull off (put on) a moustache and still look cool. Any thoughts?

By the way, Timothy Dalton is my favourite Bond. And Licence To Kill my favourite Bond film. Bond gone rogue. Classic. Actually, nowhere near as big a Bond fan as I used to be, but I still find Dalton super cool (and Roger Moore hilarious - saying "what a helpful chap" after cold-bloodedly killing someone who's just given him information).

Back to comic books, did you ever see that programme on BBC 'The Search For Steve Ditko' (the man who drew Spider-Man and Dr Strange). I'm far from being Jonathan Ross' biggest fan but he really surprised me here. And it featured Neil Gaiman. We never saw Steve Ditko, but they did find him. And there's the loveliest moment near the end with Neil looking like the world's biggest fanboy right after he's met Mr Ditko, with a massive grin on his face saying "look, he gave us comics". Warms my heart, that does.

I can't believe I let you get away with professing your love for Bryan Adams all those posts ago. All I'm saying is I prefer Stewie Griffins cover. Great video too.

The Keep - if that comes on tv again we have to watch it together (miles apart). Ian McKellan Jurgen Prochnow and Gabriel Byrne directed by Michael 'Heat' Mann. Yes, yes, yes & yes.

And to end with, one of the things I hate most in the whole world - Disney's Winnie the Pooh. Mentioning childhood favourite 'Alice In Wonderland' reminded me of this bastardised version of my other childhood favourite. Oh well, I can always read 'The House At Pooh Corner'. They can't take that away from me. Eeyore really is so splendidly gloomy (Tigger arriving in the forest - Piglet: "He's just come" - Eeyore: "when's he going").

Louise said...

Anywhere in the world and you wanna be in the east of scotland with a curmudgeonly hermit? You silly soul. You could make a real life Magick and live out those boyhood fantasies...which i in no way need to know the details of...
Having crushes on cartoon/comic book characters seems to be way more of a boy thing. You must get better stock. I think the closest i ever got was Eric from The Little Mermaid...hopefully you won't think ill of me for that, what with your Winnie the Pooh/Disney issues and all. I always liked the Disney version, why does it madden you so?
Eeyore's the reason i say 'Hallo' and 'Oh bother' sometimes. He may be my spirit animal, along with you and Cameron Frye. Such grumpy but hopeful souls, we be.
But grumpy together's much better than going solo and in respects to the wistful words you bestow upon me Dexterous, i never think of them as anything but a joy to read. It really does quite annoy me that you aren't someone i know in my day to day life. I don't have anybody but my sisters who i can truly geek out with...i guess i'm too shy to do it with others because well, what if they give me the 'WTF?' look and run away...that's happened and it hurts my wee heart. Maybe it's because we're speaking over a distance of many miles and through a computer but i reckon we'd have a blast, just nerding it out, being lazy so 'n' so's and not giving a crap that we aren't out doing the 'normal' stuff people do in their twenties. Although, i think you may be more social than i. I mean, you seem to leave the house way more than i do...way more...
Do you crave silence with people? I know that sounds odd but it's something i need and i've only encountered it a couple of times with people outside my family. I get headaches from being in people's company too long, they talk too much and want too much from me - socially inept, that is i. So when i come across someone who i can just sit with, be it reading, watching movies, listening to music, i soak it up and try not to lose them. I do every time though, which sucks. I find it hard to believe any boy will ever want to live in silence with me because no one else seems to want to be quiet...or i haven't met anyone i want to be talkative with yet, friend or more than.
Do you feel that? That everyone wants too much of you?
Insecure buds for life. That's you and i. Yessum.

Uch, today's been a weird one. Everything's seemed too loud for some reason. Did you have a funny one? Glad you got your words back though. Not that we have to leave each other epically long messages every day or anything...isn't like i look forward to a Dex-marked email in my account every morning...afternoon...nuh uh.
Really must get my sleeping patterns sorted out. Going to sleep at 5am and rising at 2pm isn't healthy. Not healthy at all. Do you think it's possible to completely reverse the way your meant to live your life? Not that i'm an early riser anyway but yeesh, i'm starting to fear my body will begin to adapt more to darkness than daylight. Will my neck become double jointed and my eyes, bell-shaped? Will i be able to echolocate my prey? Will i prey on things?!
I watch too many movies.
The Fly was on tonight but i find it hard to watch...i love horror but there's something really, really, really hard to deal with in Goldblum's transformation. Makes my skin crawl, i know it's meant to but blargh. Nasty, nasty, nasty.
The internet seems to think Jeff's dead. Ignorant internet, he'll live forever!
I'm quite tired.

Louise said...

Your old high school looks like a mini Hogwarts. Yuss. You're really a wizard, aren't you? Do you have an arch-nemesis? I bet you do. Can i say his name?! So many questions...

"I'll tell you something very geeky that I have in my possession. A bunch of Marvel Essentials, which are basically black and white reprints of 1960s Marvel comic books, complete with cheesy dialogue and unabashed sexism. So I have reprints of the first ever stories featuring Spider-Man, The Fantastic Four (The Invisible 'Girl' swooning over every man she comes across) & Dr. Strange."

^ That whole section basically makes me turn Bruce Banner coloured. How did you get these????

Timothy Hutton - Beautiful Girls. All i ever have to see to know i adore him and his slightly creepy love for a too young Natalie Portman. But everyone had that though, didn't they? I mean, Leon? She was without comparison. Where's all that gone? She's not very good now, except for Black Swan. I get this feeling you hate that movie, not sure why, i can just feel it in my bones again. Lots of people do, it's kind of just a reason to see Miss Portman do dirty things in a tutu but whatever, i think it's seriously beautiful and each time i watch it, i grow to love it more. Might have something to do with my major girl crush on Mila Kunis also however.
Don't you just love how i defend things before you've even had a chance to answer? Force of habit with this one, i'm afraid. No one i know likes it. Not one tiny bit. I watched it with my family the first time...that was uncomfortable.
Worst instance of a sex in a movie being viewed with the parentals in the room: the phone sex scene in Going The Distance. I almost left the room, it was too much to bear. There's should be warnings on the box about these things! Like 'Hey there offspring, there's some filthy stuff in this movie so don't watch it with the rentals, k?'
Think i can patent that?

Right now, i am trying to learn all the useful shortcuts on my laptop. The moving between windows/tabs/programs shortcuts are saving my sanity. Why didn't i learn these things earlier? Oh yeah, cause computers hate me and i hate them back. That's a lie. I worship the little, shiny bastard.

Tony Blair/Mangan thing - i missed it too, i really meant to see it but i think i just couldn't be bothered. Stephen Mangan is one funny duck though. Have you seen Free Agents? S'pretty funny, especially Tony Head as a the perverted boss of a talent scouting agency. Dishwasher and sex toys. Genius, i tell you.

Skip back to Timothy of the Hutton variety. Is 'A Nero Wolfe Mystery' worthy watching?

I did indeed illustrate my own Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. You can see it here:

http://mycancerousbeloved.deviantart.com/art/Book-21163280

Excuse the crappy DeviantArt name, i was young and severely.
I didn't illustrate the whole thing, i didn't have time as it was for my Advanced Higher Art and i'm crap with time constraints. I don't even like it that much now, maybe it's something i should do again. After the sleepwalking adventures of you and i, of course.
And you know you'd never sue me. Couldn't break a Lilly heart now could you? Didn't think so.

Louise said...

What movie do you wanna watch first? What are we in the mood for? Comedy? Action? 80s masterpiece? Deep and meaningful? Artistic? What do you think? No Timothy Dalton though, i can't join you on that one. My favourite Bond should be Connery but it's probably Brosnan. Grew up with his Bonding about so it's kind of got a special place in my heart. How do you feel about Daniel Craig? I like him. Have you seen Skyfall yet? I'm scared. That bit with the train and fixing his collar looks so immensely cool that i fear the rest of the film will be a letdown. Javier Bardem is sure to give a knockout performance because well, you've seen No Country For Old Men i'm sure. Even in Vicky Cristina Barcelona, which i kinda like...i think, i'm never really very sure but he just oozed awesomeness and i'm quite confident in thinking that he wasn't trying to hard. Penelope Cruz in that as well, man. That woman could totally make me into girls with that performance. Such a mental case but oh so pretty.
An admittance, yes, another one: I really love Vanilla Sky.
And The Keep? It's a date.

"Man we were killin' time
We were young and restless
We needed to unwind
I guess nothin' can last forever, forever, no

And now the times are changin'
Look at everything that's come and gone
Sometimes when I play that old six-string
I think about you, wonder what went wrong"

:) You'll never shame me out of my love. One of my favourites? When You're Gone featuring Mel C.
I'm singing it now. Yes, yes i am. Know what else i love? Journey. And you better believe it. The late 70s and the 80s...we've got a special thing going on.

"You make me weep and wanna die
Just when you said we'd try

Lovin', touchin', squeezin' each other
When I'm alone all by myself
You're out with someone else
Lovin', touchin', squeezin' each other

You're tearin' me apart
Every, every day
You're tearin' me apart
Oh what can I say?
You're tearin' me apart"

Buahahah! I'm so happy right now to have Journey in my head, it's bordering on perverse.

Ugh, happy but sleepy.
I shall end this reply by saying only this:

I don't know if we'll ever spend a summer together. You can't predict these things y'know and we do live an awful long way away from each other and maybe that's a good thing. Who knows, you may be in my presence and find me out, that i'm not special at all and not all the time you spend on me. That would suck.

Awk, i finished on a dreary note.

More singing!

"It won't be long, yes, till you're alone
When your lover, oh, he hasn't come home
Cause he's lovin', who he's touchin',
He's squeezin' another

He's tearin' you apart
Every, every day
He's tearin' you apart
Oh girl what can you say?
Cause he's lovin', touchin' another
Now it's your turn girl to cry
Na na na na na na
Na na na na na
Na na na na na na
Na na na na na"

:)

Louise said...

I'm still awake, still singing and seriously considering staying up all night to reset my system...i won't last.

Today, yesterday now, i spent what remained of it, when i finally got out of bed, drawing and cutting out pink/red/coral/lavender hearts for a valentine's day window that we're disguising as a heart disease awareness window at work.
I'm about ready to puke.
Don't talk to me about V-Day. It's a twunt of a day.
And that's only 5% bitterness over being unloved as of late. It's always been a twunt of a day.

I'm such a bitch :(

Dex said...

Lilly, you're not :) I love you, even if it's only from a distance. Please don't throw up all over your laptop.

I've done so much this morning.

Hung the washing outside. Lovely clear blue sky today and an attractively slight dusting of frost on everything. Not much of a breeze though, probably won't dry the clothes very well. Oh well, you can't have everything.

Put the rubbish out.

Washed up the breakfast things.

Hoovered the house. Or should that be vacuumed? Hmm.

Well, it seems a lot to me. Especially for a Saturday morning. I get in these moods from time to time.

Now I'm listening to the amazing music on your blog, writing this, and contemplating making pancakes for lunch. Mmmm, pancakes.

So, what films are we gonna watch?

Did you manage to reset yourself?

Louise said...

It's only just become apparent to me that i have now told anyone who reads my blog, friend or stranger, that i watch TVD obsessively and i think i'm unlovable...crap-sticks.

I didn't reset myself, i fell asleep at 5:30am with my book open and my torch blazing...i woke an hour later to a very sad torchlight.

I got up at 2:30pm, stop putting me to shame Dex or at least teach me your early rising ways.

Dex said...

I like staying up all through the night when I have the willpower I actually only woke up at about 10:30am. Did all that in about an hour and a half. Will reward myself with 22 and a half hours inactivity. This task-reward system is really working out for me. Did you spot the Cyndi Lauper song?

I think you either like someone and want to spend time with them, or you don't. You can't help the way you feel. I like quiet places though. Hustle and bustle isn't for me. I sometimes worry that I'm too selfish a creature for anyone to put up with. I guess I like for people to show me the same consideration that I think I show them (even though I probably don't). I get the impression that people spend 5 minutes with me and come to the conclusion that I'm not worth the effort.

I don't have many friends, although I get on with a lot of people. But a friend is different to being friendly. I doubt anyone I know in Shetland could tell you a single thing about me other than what they've seen. Y'know, what I like, what I dislike, what I want to do with my life, what I think is funny or sad, where I'd like to go, things like that. That's not their fault, I probably don't take much interest in them either.

I very rarely go out to social events. The last time I did was just before Christmas. I went for a meal at 'The Shetland Hotel' with people from my work. It was okay, but they were all drinking and I wasn't. Afterwards we went to several pubs, which isn't a fun experience when you're sober. I don't have a moral issue with alcohol, I just don't like the taste and it frustates me that it should seem necessary to having a good time.

Pubs in Shetland are ghastly. They're crowded, the floors are sticky, the music is so loud you can't talk to people, and most of them are too drunk anyway.

That's one of the things I really dislike about Shetland. There are very few places you can go for a quiet drink and an intimate chat with a close friend. I'm struggling to think of any apart from the Mareel cafe/bar, and that's only been open a few months. There's 'The Peerie Shop Cafe' which I think is really nice in terms of food and drink, but way too small and always too busy.

It's usually better to stay at home.

I wouldn't say Anderson High was quite Hogwarts, but it was okay :) They're always talking about building a new high school in Lerwick, worryingly close to where I live, but they never seem to get around to it. I saw in 'The Shetland Times' (our local newspaper) a picture of one of my former classmates and someone I went to university with. She's a teacher at the Anderson High now. I don't know why, but it made me feel a bit odd.

I was pointlessly trying to remember the layout of my old school:

A Block
A3 - Art/Technical
A2 - Maths
A1 - Practical Technical

B Block
B3 - Modern Languages
B2 - Business Studies
B1 - Computing

C Block
C3 - History/Geography/Modern Studies
C2 - Physics
C1 - I think it was just spare out-of-the-way classrooms

D Block - Chemistry/Biology

Then there was the English Department & library, which we're in the oldest part of the school. Also the English huts, The PE Department and The Music Department.

I think about the past way too much. Well, the happy parts (a lot of it I just phase out).

Dex said...

Shetland has a colossal number of schools. I'd guess there are 2 high schools, 5 junior high schools and 25 primary schools on the islands. I'm a clerical gofer too, for the Psychological Service (Educational Psychologists), so it's a pretty accurate guess, since I have list of the schools sitting in front of me every day I'm in the office. Also I used to work in the school office of one of the island schools. It took some effort to drag myself to work every day for someone who didn't have a car (25 mins walk to the ferry terminal, 7 mins ferry crossing, 15 mins walk to the school, and back again).

I don't know why I'm suddenly talking so much about schools.

Even though I can drive now, I still walk almost everywhere.

I just help out at the cinema from time to time. They like to keep me around for my good looks and sparkling personality. It's not my real job. I got to use a walkie talkie last time I was in there, which gave me a childish thrill. (I didn't say "over and out" though).

I haven't seen enough Nero Wolfe to give it my official seal of approval, but it looks like a really classy piece of television. Not meaning to sound appallingly elitist, but maybe a tad too classy for the masses. Here's a link to a very short clip:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZk8iZWflKQ

No Country For Old Men - yay ("Call it")

Bryan Adams lyrics - I suppose I was asking for it. I'm gonna post the entire transcipt to Home Alone 2 in my next reply.

I've never seen Black Swan. I went see a screening of The Nutcracker (performed by the Bolshoi Ballet) at Mareel. I don't like people who clap in the middle of things. And I don't like the fact that you're supposed to make little noises over the phone to indicate you're listening to the person on the other end. If you ever need confirmation, it means you've been talking too long.

What the hell is wrong with me?

I don't know why I dislike some things (even things I've never seen). Prejudice. I'm just like Mr Darcy. Actually, he was pride. Elizabeth was prejudice. Have I got that right? Didn't you blog about Pride and Prejudice and zombies?

Oh Lilly, sorry to waffle on about nothing. Tell me about all the amazing and not-so-amazing things you've done in your life. I want to know everthing (well, everything you're willing to share). Where you went on holiday when you were younger, what games you used to play, where you'd like to go, what you'd like to see, and most importantly, did you have a Megadrive or SNES?

Obviously, I'm not expecting it all in your next reply.

I think I bought those Marvel Essentials at Forbidden Planet & Waterstones (maybe even ordered some from Amazon). Essential Spider-Man vol. 1, Essential Fantastic Four vol. 1...total bargain :)

Best X-Men line-up (Cyclops, Wolverine, Nightcrawler, Colossus, Storm, Phoenix). I know you love it when I talk geek to you. Also Eric from The Little Mermaid was voiced by Christopher Daniel Barnes, who also voiced Spider-Man in the 1990s animated series. Admittedly, it's not as good as Uncle Phil as Shredder, but worth knowing, right?

That cover for Alice in Wonderland was too cool for school. And despite your aversion to Valentine's Day, I hope you'll blog a picture of your window display.

Louise said...

All Through The Night for the win!
When i say things like that, i feel like Charlie Sheen and that is not a good thing. Martin Sheen? Hells yeah but his offspring? Hells no. I'd take Emilio over Charlie, though. Any day.
I bought Repo Man just before Christmas and i still haven't watched it yet. For shame.
And Rumble Fish. Although that has nothing to do with any of the Sheens...It does have Tom Waits in it though! And i get happy every single time that man cameos. Cannot wait to see him with a fluffy bunny in Seven Psychopaths. It'll also feed my love of Sam Rockwell. Lawn Dogs and Matchstick Men - spectacular. Have you seen the man dance? It's fucking amazing. I catch myself being hypnotised by the gifs that circulate the internet of him putting Travolta to shame:

http://media.beta.photobucket.com/user/mags8407/media/nsync.gif.html?filters[term]=excited%20dance&filters[primary]=images&o=14

See what i mean.

We're so similar it's starting to worry me a little. Imagine if we spent time together, we'd be even worse! A couple of neurotic shut-ins, with a movie watching problem. That wouldn't be healthy...would it?
We both don't drink. Hmm. Same birthday. Both part of the % of the world that thinks alcohol tastes like hairspray. Lone wolves - just go with that, it makes us sound cool, like James Dean. We'd prefer to stay home than party and we both, rather sadly think everybody sees us as non-entities that aren't worth their time...Dex, are you my evil-bornayearearlier-twin? Cause that'd be kinda cool.

I miss my friends but i don't think they really 'get' me anymore though, which is my fault because i locked myself away and changed without them. They're all so...alive and i'm half asleep all the time. Tires me out just watching them. They all live away from Blair now and i have this fear of public transport - jesus, i'm messed up - so i don't think i've visited them once in all the time they've been gone. That's sad. I really need to get out more.
I had a full scale meltdown today. Not a loud, explosive one. More of a little bang and a flump. I think i have cabin fever. I also think finding out that another of the people i knew from high school is now married...to someone who plays in a band that i adore...and she's younger than me...fuck. What is with everyone getting married and having babies? Freaks me the fuck out. I can barely look after myself, let alone take into account a whole other person's feelings or be responsible for a tiny human being that i've somehow made! - i know how babies are made, don't worry, i'm not totally idiotic.
Babies freak me out and i'm only 25, that's practically brand new!
Isn't it?

Louise said...

So, if the cinema isn't your real job...is it the clerical gofer stuff?
What do you really, really want to be Dexterous? Did you have an idea when you were growing from little Dex to big Dex? Or are you like me and have absolutely no clue whatsoever what the hell to do with your life and never have done?
Once upon a time i thought i wanted to be a vet...but then i found out about having to put animals down - i was quite little.
Then there was the architect phase...but i suck at maths.
As a very little little girl, i wanted to be in charge of a JCB and tear shit down - i was named the Lego Bomb through early childhood...you can probably figure out why. Plus it matches my initials! Which has always made me happy :)
I wanted to be in a band...i have two guitars, i can play neither. I taught myself to play piano...i suck at it but i want to try again. I do not have the lung capacity or a strong enough diaphragm to sing and the painful shyness doesn't help either.
There's always been the part of me that wanted to be involved with music. Maybe not in a band but just around it. Finding new stuff for tv, soundtracks, radio. Wouldn't it be great to be part of the deciding process of putting together the soundtrack to a movie? Imagine helping Cameron Crowe put together the Almost Famous soundtrack...that is heaven, right there. I don't think that's an actual job though, the director and writers tend to do that stuff, i guess. If i could write worth a damn i'd be more than happy to review music for a magazine/blog/radio but all the best music journos have a certain acidic but likeable tone to their writing, like Charlie Brooker does with tv. My writing is lazy and not in any way original.
Then there's art. Is there a job in art? I don't want to live in a cardboard box. My stuff isn't good enough for that!
Would it be wrong to let someone take care me for the rest of my days? It would. I don't need you to answer that. It definitely would.
I don't want to be a clerical monkey all my days and i bet you don't either!

Rambling...

SNES, of course. Super Mario World! We had this one were you could paint and make music...that was the best thing ever. Screw guitar hero, i was a freaking mario mozart machine! And i liked colouring in Yoshi...i always made him an odd colour.

Louise said...

I will indeed post pictures of the window display when it's done. It'll be disgustingly girly but i have no choice in the matter. I've been meaning to post all the windows we've done but my sister is holding the photos hostage so i'll have to wrestle them off her first. We did an Alice window once, my sister knitted mome raths and i made silhouettes of the characters and a forest to back the whole thing. I think it's on my blog somewhere, but possibly not. Here's a link:

http://snowinateapot.blogspot.co.uk/2010/03/i-heard-you-fell-into-rabbit-hole.html

I loved doing that, for obvious reasons.

Did the rest of your day go well dearest one? Did you use those hours wisely? Sitting, napping, drinking, eating...the important stuff.

I was thinking we should watch Dark City. I watched it when i was younger and have totally forgotten everything about it. Wanna? It's got Rufus Sewell in it! The finest modern Petruchio i have ever seen...well, along with Heath Ledger. That stupid man. I miss his acting.
You know what i really enjoyed with him in? Pillars of the Earth? Hah, i like such crap and thank you for not shaming me for watching TVD...you are one in a million, i would totally rip you for it :)

It is getting late and i have to stop getting up at stupid hours so i'm going to go wash my face, read my book and get on with some of those slumberful adventures we're supposed to be having.

But...

Holidays when young - Stratford-Upon-Avon, York, London, Oxford, Durham, Carradale (my favourite place in the world...so far), Wales and the Lake District. I've never been out the country.

Places i'd like to go - West Virginia, New York, Prague, Florence, anywhere in the south of France, Australia, Ireland (i'm an 1/8 Irish), Belgium (i'm also an 1/8 Belgian...i'm a mongrel and i like it that way!), Orkney Islands and the Shetlands (not just because of you but you'd be a bonus), Iceland, Alaska, Tokyo. Lots of places and i will some day. Oh! and Canada. I really wanna go to Canada.

Games - i suck at games :) but Mario-Kart (i always get stuck in corners), Crash Bandicoot, the training course part of Tomb Raider (i used to watch my dad play, through my fingers that is. I get tense...i dunno), Mickey Mouse Crazy Castle for the gameboy (remember those?), Wario, Star Fox (holy shit, i loved that game), Zelda, the first Final Fantasy but i thought it was shit, Grand Turismo, Burnout, Rock Band, Ecco the Dolphin: Defender of the Future, Mortal Kombat, Cool Boarders, Street Fighters, The Addams Family game, Sonic!, Lemmings, Creatures.
There's be more but i can't remember just now and i really do suck at basically all of these games. Except for Burnout, Rock Star and Mortal Kombat.

What do youuu play?

Louise said...

I've never done anything exciting. Ever. That makes me blue.

I'm allergic to face paint and wool. My skin is super sensitive.

I have two middle names and for a while i went by the the first, middle one. I'm not overly fond of my first name but i'm okay with it now.

I have two small scars on my face that were caused by eldest sister. Both accidents but i still make her feel guilty for damaging me. I'm a little sister. It's what we do.

I had a hamster once. He was called Cocoa (inventive, eh?). He hated me. My cat hit him around the head. He died soon after. We buried him in my back garden in a lightbulb box. I still think about him out there. I hope he went someone good, like hamster heaven. I'm not even kidding.

My Dad's Dad died when i was very young. I miss him terribly. I got his forehead. Hah. S'true.

I like to smell marker pens even though i know they're toxic. I inhale deeply and don't think about what damage it might be doing me. This is not very often...i'm not a druggie!

I don't do favourites but Angela Carter's, Heroes and Villains is quite possibly my favourite book of all time but i refuse to confirm that.

I'm deeply afraid of german shepherds as a result of one jumping on my shoulders and me falling backwards when i was about 4...but if you handed me a GS puppy, i would love it like no other.

I like to sleep to the sound of a ticking clock and i cannot breathe properly if i cocoon myself underneath my duvet.

I used to sing in my sleep.

Uhmmm....i can't click my fingers and it really annoys me!

That's all for now :)

Louise said...

Seeing as though i'm still awake...

The movie i'm most afraid of - Deep Blue Sea...and i've seen Switchblade Romance, twice.

I had asthma when i was little and to this day i still stop breathing when people tickle me (and i'm very ticklish) to the point of some kind soul have to stop the tickler and talk me into breathing again. The phrase, 'big, deep breaths' is a well used one in my household. It's horrible, most people have the instinct to keep breathing, to catch their breath...i just clam up and shut down. Someday, no one will be there to help me and i will pass out or quite possibly die. I have tickle fear.

I have light freckles underneath my eyes and a few across the bridge of my nose. I wish i had more. Freckles are lovely.

When i was in primary school, i walked into a rough cast wall and cut my head. It bled like a tap as i walked towards my mum who was picking me up from school. I got butterfly stitches and a scar. I've always liked both. My sister brought me Lovehearts, or was it Refreshers, i can't recall.

Louise said...

And.

All the mistakes i've made in these replies are making me crazy but i will not correct them. I'm trying to be less pernickety. Trying.

Dex said...

Hmm, so I'm the evil twin?

Was it a milk or dark Terry's Chocolate Orange? I haven't had one of those in years. Is it dangerous to hug you when you're grumpy? I had no idea what glomping was until I watched that clip. I want to be glomped so badly :)

Seriously though, I'm really happy you still talk to me, even after you've had a rather crappy day. I hope wathching grown men getting pulped in the name of sport has cheered you up no end.

And I love hearing about all the things you've done in your life, no matter how small.

I drift in and out of bad moods all the time. I sometimes think it is the result of some underying unhappiness in my life. But I get over them quick enough. I'm like that, it doesn't take much to make me upset and it doesn't take much to make me happy again.

I'd never shame you for watching anything. I love Jackie Chan films, and I don't care what anyone says, that man brings me happiness in abundance :)

I've been to a few different countries, but not for a long time. The last time was Norway & Sweden, way back in the summer of 2004. I was 17 and just about to start university. Norway is very pretty, maybe the prettiest place I've ever seen. There used to be a boat from Shetland to Bergen, but I'm to feeble with my words to describe the beauty of the fjords, only that I've never seen anything that looked so still and so deep and so blue. I wanted to live in one of those houses I could see from the boat. What must it be like to wake up to a view like that every morning? And you could take your car, so we drove through all of those windy mountain roads, and those tunnels that went through the mountains, and you'd see small villages way down in the valleys below.

Those are the only 2 countries I've been to in Europe. I've been to the USA and Hawaii, but I was too young to remember anything about it. Also Phillippines, Bali, Hong Kong (way back when it was still governed by Britain), Kuala Lumpar, Thailand, Singapore. I really should count myself lucky to have seen so many places but I wouldn't want to go back. The only thing I really liked was staying in skyscraper hotels, looking out on the city at night. Or staying in idyllic resorts by the beach, or up in the mountains, away from all the noise. I don't think I'd do that now though, I'd probably get very bored very quickly and I'm no sun worshipper (although I'm very happy when it appears in Shetland). Island hopping (spending the day travelling by motor boat to all the little islands) was quite nice though. But you don't really get the culture of these places by doing those kind of things.

I've never been travelling on my own, which I've always thought I'd prefer for the obvious reasons of seeing the places that you want to see, and doing the things that you want to do. I'd like to go to a city like Kyoto or Tokyo (or even Glasgow), with a Lonely Planet guide book, and just explore the hell out of them. Then again, it might be kinda lonesome. Travelling with a friend might suit me better (you game?).

I'd like to see more of Scotland. Don't you love it when we finally get sunny weather and a warm day with a very slight breeze.

How do you feel about flying? I don't like it at all. I like airports though, for some odd reason. I reckon I could spend a few days happily pottering around a massive airport, riding mile-long escalators, watching the planes arrive and take-off. I like those quiet places in the midst of busy places, y'know, like the natural history section of a Waterstones.

Dex said...

You're one of the brightest, most intelligent, imaginative, creative and thoughtful people that I've ever come across Lilly. I thought that even before we started this incredibly long conversation. Don't say that you're not, because it is just so apparent to anyone who comes across this blog. I don't know what it would take for you to be happy for the rest of your life, but you're going to find something you love doing that's worthy of your talents.

You actually make me feel slightly ashamed of myself. You've seen way more films, read way more books, listened to way more music, and have way more creative talent.

Oh, and I'd happily sit in silence with you. All day, every day (okay, that's maybe an exaggeration, we'd need to do some other stuff, but you know what I mean).

An no, I don't want to be a clerical gofer all my life either, or even for another day. I don't know what I want. To do nothing, probably. I'm very lazy. I always thought it would be fun to run a cinema (paraphrasing Citizen Kane), but I reckon I'd never make any money out of it considering all the rubbish I'd put on.

Dark City - yay, let's watch it.

Random question - what are your favourite foods? Too random? Oh, and do you cook?

I can only make pancakes, but they are the best pancakes in the world. Maybe cupcakes, but I can rarely be bothered.

If I'm at work, I usually have a toastie for lunch. I get them from a place called Zlotys (actually Faerdie-Maet, but no-one calls it that). Sometimes some soup from The Peerie Shop Cafe.

Ooh, and I like cupcakes from Emma-Louise's Cupcakes. Ha, I have an uncle who says 'ooh' about everything, as if it was all a luxury.

'Would you like some chocolate'.
'Ooh, chocolate'.

I don't have many relatives. The only one I'm quite close to is my cousin in Aberdeen (y'know, the one in Aberdeen who's not from Shetland and who I will not be marrying - she's married already, to my brother - no, not really). She has this dog and he hates me, just stares and growls when I move. I don't think I could have pets. I'd just become too emotionally attached to them, like she is to her dog. We did have 2 samoyeds when I was growing up (they look like wolves). Actually my family joke that the reason I don't get on with her dog is that we are just too similar - spoilt and moody.

I was so embarrassed on Friday. I went out for lunch and only came back with 3 paper bags full of sweets from the corner sweet shop (strawberry foams, strawberry kisses, and lemonade fizz bombs). Surprisingly, I don't have any fillings.

It takes me 20mins to brush my teeth at night - 20mins! I have no idea why it takes so long, but it does. I hope you're not picturing me as having a mouth like a shark.

Apart from Tesco, we don't have any shops in Shetland that sell DVDs or CDs (well, CDs that don't contain fiddle music). There used to be Clive's Record Shop, but that was kinda useless and way overpriced.

We do have 1 bookshop, The Shetland Times Bookshop, where I used to have an after-school job. That's a bit rubbish too.

There's lots of take-aways in Lerwick. Lots. And a lot of restaurants.

Some more guilty pleasures:

Takeshi's Castle
Total Wipeout USA (I so want that swimming pool and apparatus).

Did you watch Red Dwarf? I just loved the first 6 series. Why do things have to go downhill?

PS - I can't tell you enough how much I love you and your sisters window displays. They're just fantastic.

Louise said...

"It's what's inside that counts! It's not the peel, it's the nana!"

I will reply in length, later. I just had to get that out.

Dex said...

I understand, you porcine frottaging trollop.

I am so, very, very, very sorry.

Dex said...

Okay, I just realised I posted that about 2 seconds after you blogged an article about online friendships.

I'm going to hell, aren't I?

Louise said...

Yeah but we'll be roomies and how sweet is that?

Louise said...

I can't believe you called me a trollop...for shame!

Dex said...

Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?

Louise said...

An axolotl salamander...please.

Dex said...

Would you settle for a Burra Bear?

http://www.burrabears.co.uk/bigpicpages/bearsatpier.html

Louise said...

Hah, go on then. I'd have to keep it at a distance though...i'm allergic to wool. I could love a Burra Bear from afar, i'm sure.

Dex said...

Lilly - allergies - face paint & wool.

I'm so forgetful :(

Louise said...

To be fair, i hadn't mentioned the wool, so forgetful you are not!
Just for good measure, i'm also allergic to kiwi fruit.

Got any allergies Dex?

Guess what i'm watching?

Dex said...

No allergies - at least, none that I'm aware of.

It has to be Die Hard 4.0

Louise said...

Bet your ass it's Die Hard 4.0 :)

I think you really like this movie, you're just too ashamed to admit it. You totally crush on hairless Brucey, as you should!

Dex said...

Please tell me you've not switched to Channel 4+1 to watch the first hour all over again.

Actually, you should. Then we would be watching it simultaneously.

Louise said...

Nah, i only missed 30 odd minutes and i basically know it off by heart anyways. How can you not like this? It's so violent and silly. I could listen to Bruce Willis grumble like a bloodthirsty bear all the live long day. Actually, you know what? I want that exact noise as my alarm clock. Yessum.

Dex said...

I'm never gonna last the distance.

I see Home Alone is on E4+1.



Louise said...

Who do you think would win over what got watched if we were in the same room?

Dex said...

I'd watch anything with you, even Die Hard 4.0. Probably.

Are you watching tv in your bedroom?

Louise said...

'Probably'

Hehe. I actually 'hehe' in real life. In a nice way, not a creepy psychopath way. I have many and varied laughs, i think enjoy the nerd laugh the most.

Would you watch...a Bryan Adams concert with me?

I'm currently in my chair, yes, my chair in the living room with the folks and the eldest sister but soon i shall disappear to my room. Why?
Where are you?
Nantucket?!
I don't know.

Dex said...

Would you be singing along to all of his songs?

I'm at home, in the living room, but on my own. Everyone else has gone to bed.

Did your folks also watch Die Hard 4.0? Do they love Bruce as much as you?

And do you all have your own chairs?

Louise said...

Dude - yeah i'm still trying to make that happen - i wouldn't stop singing even after it had finished. It's be Everything I Do and Heaven all night long! You'd want to murder me.

We're all Brucey fans, since Moonlighting and such. What was the last thing you liked him in?
Are you watching the Culkin get his malevolent on?

We do indeed, all have chairs. Your family sleeps early! Or is it, normal?

Dex said...

Hmm, Unbreakable, maybe.

My parents wake up at 6:30am. And my brother has to be at work for 7am. So maybe not quite normal.

I sometimes laugh like Jeff Goldblum:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBxgAmdPQWg

What are you gonna watch now? Home Alone has finished, by the way.

Louise said...

I am now going to watch the new series of Being Human. I hope it's better than the last season. I'm so mad at Aiden Turner.

Sorry i took so long to reply, my computer had an almighty brainfreeze. It's starting to scare me. Know anything about macbooks?

Laughing like Jeff Goldblum = cute, like a puppy who can't quite bark yet.

Dex said...

Mad at Aiden Turner for getting staked, or for being in 'The Hobbit'?

That's okay. It's not like we wait obsessively for each other to reply :)

Do you really say 'hehe' in real life? That's adorable. What does a nerd laugh sound like?

Louise said...

A nerd laugh kind of sounds like Jimmy Carr. Like a very happy seal. It amuses me. And yeah, i 'hehe' for real. Usual when i've done something mischievous, like a cartoon character.

I'm mad at Turner for The Hobbit. Tovey had to stake him, it was the only way to bring that story to any satisfying conclusion...it still breaks me heart though.

What you doingggg?

Louise said...

'...my heart...'

Sigh.

Dex said...

Lilly, I though you were trying to be less pernickety :)

I'm still in my living room, channel hopping and finishing off a little bit of work, even though I'm officially on holiday.

Any plans for tomorrow?

Do you think you'll stay up 'til the early hours?

I thought I'd be watching American Dad after Family Guy, but it was Being Human instead (I forgot that was BBC Three).

Louise said...

Old habits die hard. Badoom boom tsh.

Dexterous, stop working. I demand it. Am i keeping you awake? It seems awfully late for you to still be conversing with us night owls.

Louise said...

Oh my goodness, that wee kid just called Tom an apple-john and i swear he just said flap-dragon.

Being Human has won my love, once again!

Dex said...

I'm done.

I'm really very tired. If we were in the same room, I'd have fallen asleep right next to you, so you could watch anything you'd like, maybe even subliminally subject me to Bryan Adams.

Goodnight lovely Lilly. Time to fight some crime. Do you accept hugs this late at night?

Dex said...

an apple-john :) all the best people are.

and on that happy note...

Louise said...

Hugs are an always kind of act. Gimme, gimme.

Sleep well Dex, you dapper chap. Get that cape on!

:)

Louise said...

I should be sleeping but alas, that's just not me, is it?

I liked talking to you basically all day m'dear. It brought me lots of cheer. Even when i was a little upset, your banter brought me back to the smiles i know and love.

You're my favourite apple-john, for sure :)

Just thought you should know.

Dex said...

That's one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me.

I'd keep you company from sunset to sunrise if I thought it would make you a little bit happier.

It's snowing today, and not in a pleasant way, so I doubt that I'll be going out.

Will you be watching 'Black Mirror' tonight?

Don't forget that there's someone 384 miles away that thinks a helluva lot about you :)

I don't care that we're way too nice to each other. Okay, maybe I care just a little bit. I sent you a picture of 'Burra Bears' for goodness sake! That's not me!

Louise said...

Bears, compliments, professing our dislike for being so far apart...we are soooo sickening but i like it, so i can deal with the nausea.
What would you normally give a girl? Friend or otherwise?
I gave my best friend Transformers for his 18th...probably the nicest thing i've ever given anyone...that's not good, is it?

Is it still snowing? I think we're getting it tomorrow but you never know with our belligerent Scottish weather.
Dex, i got up at 2:30pm today, i think i'm broken...i miss the daylight! I did wake up with a migraine though, so maybe it's not my fault i went back to sleep?

Black Mirror is a go! Cannot wait. Domhnall Gleeson is becoming a fast favourite. He was the best thing in Dredd and he could barely form words.
Did you watch the first series? Which was your favourite episode if you did?
My mum bought Immortals for £3 today...hello monday evening movie watching trash. Yay. Seen 300? Gonna see the new one with Eva Green? She is pretty damn cool. I can't believe her first movie was The Dreamers. Who's first movie is that bloody good? Who?

I'm going to be sickening now:

I wish you were next door, so i could come over and watch silly stuff with you and talk about nerdy crap all day...without having to worry about catching busses and trains and whatnot. It would literally take me 2 minutes to skip over in my slippers. Are you judging me right now for wearing slippers? They're warm!

You're too far away, buddy!

Louise said...

Oh, and can i run that cinema with you? I got so excited at the idea of it. Honestly.

Dex said...

How much fun would that be, to run a cinema together. I reckon we'd put films on at 1am and never advertise.

I'm wearing slippers and a dressing gown. I lose slippers with alarming frequency. Someone spilt milk all over my last pair, and another pair I lost in a mini temper tantrum (I tried to kick something on the floor and one slipper went flying off my foot and landed in the deep fat frier).

I thought I gave a rather nice present to a girl last Christmas for our office Secret Santa. I made a little necklace with her name on it from some craft materials. She thought it was a decoration and hung it on her tree :(

I received a gift bag containing 2 pairs of colourful socks, a slab of Orkney cheese, a mousetrap & a bunch of cocktail sticks. Admittedly, I thought it was hilarious. Best present ever :)

I never saw the first series of Black Mirror. I really should watch it on 4oD. I have a lot of time for Mr. Brooker (well, his Screenwipe. That's really the only thing I've seen him do). I did watch 'Nathan Barley', a series that he wrote with Chris 'Brass Eye' Morris and starred Julian Barratt.

Important question - Transformers present - toys, cartoon or film? I'm sorry, but I have to know these things. Admittedly, for an 18 year old I'm guessing it's the film, but please remember that I'm a closet geek.

Dex said...

I hope you recover from your migraine in time for Black Mirrow.

I'm sure you have lovely hands in real life :) but the very mention of girls with monster hands always puts me in mind of this clip:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bSL4cmFW_GU

Louise said...

Could it be like Shosanna's cinema? All 40s class but with fewer explosions and deaths? Cause that'd be neat and yeah, it'd probably turn into a cinema just for us. Hah. Or we could lure people in with atypical mainstream movies and then bombard them with 80s classics...or is that too cruel?

A deep fat frier killed your slipper? That's not a sentence you see every day. I've never been fond of the dressing gown, i tend just to drape myself in the cosiest sweatshirt or cardigan i can find. That's pretty much how i dress anyway...i am the personification of scruff-tacular.

Fortunately, my head has stopped punishing me for some unknown crime. I love drugs and sleep. Yes, yes i do. Black Mirror, here i come. I have this feeling it's going to break my heart though, so i may need a cup of tea to get me through it.
Do you find it weird that Brooker is married and has a child with Connie Huq? It's such an odd combination. It was very sweet though, when he returned for his first column in The Guardian since his baby shot out, he had a full blow 'babies are awesome' rant, swore he would never do it again and has failed miserably ever since.
He is too awesome.
Yet another curmudgeonly role model.

Seinfeld - i could never get into it but those hands are indeed monstrous!

Transformers toys. We couldn't figure out to construct them...our nursery school trainee teacher friend had to do it for us. Kind of embarrassing!

How frickin' sweet are you for actually making a secret santa gift? I've never heard of anybody doing that before. You're a Dexterous Epistolean of many hidden depths, yupyup.

Dex said...

Lilly, promise you'll never program a fake version of me with anything I say on your blog or the characteristics I display.

Louise said...

Promise.

Dex said...

What did you think of it? Did you end up needing that cup of tea?

Louise said...

I pretty much loved it. Broke my heart several times over, gave me a knot in my stomach watching Hayley Atwell fall apart and good god it made me yearn for those coupley things. I know i was supposed to be paying attention to how technology is affecting our lives and i was but i think it's a testament to just how good Brooker is that it wasn't all-encompassing, that it wasn't like being smacked in the face with 'the point' like so many shows do. What i really cared about was that feeling of losing someone, the desperation that follows and the ultimate disappointment in trying to recreate it.
I might have really, really liked it.
And Atwell and Gleeson were just so, so good. He's really shaping up to be just like his Dad. They both have that magical timing.

What you think, dear?

Dex said...

It made me sad. I feel a little bit empty inside.

I completely agree about how the satire wasn't heavy-handed. It just blended so seemlessly with the storyline and emotions.

What'ya gonna do now?

Louise said...

I'm gonna watch my recording of Revenge, in my pyjamas, with the lights out, in my bed...like a sad bastard.

Don't feel empty inside. Or i'll have to fill you up with sickly sweet cups of tea and burra bears.

Dex said...

At uni, I used to fall asleep in my room watching episodes of Frasier...now that's sad.

A cup of tea and a double dose of 'American Dad' cheered me up slightly :)

Enjoy Revenge.

Louise said...

That's not sad, that's one of the finest ways to fall into slumber and you know i wouldn't lie to you.

Niles and Daphne - the most unbelievable couple in the history of television. I still rooted for them, though.

This might bring some more cheer:

http://youtu.be/_HmEGRVUcR0

Dex said...

Lilly, you just made me so happy. I haven't thought about Rocko's Modern Life in over 10 years, probably a lot more than that. I recalled it instantly, I used to watch it all the time :)

Here's something for you, I hope you like:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Exe0IEB3hKs

Louise said...

"Do the monkey with me!"

I didn't get to see as much of him and his stellar hair as i wanted to, not having cartoon network and all.
I wish i had it now. A whole day of cartoons sounds really awesome.

Did you ever watch this:

http://youtu.be/otCWl8uJenA

No wonder i grew up to like creepy things.

Dex said...

I remember the first time I had a hotel room all to myself, in one of those fantastic skyscraper hotels.

My parents went out to dinner with some friends, and left me alone with room service & Cartoon Network. Frickin' amazing night.

Let's do that sometime.

Gargoyles - yes, a thousand times yes.

This was another childhood favourite:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1-Q7a6SxIBk

Louise said...

Holy shit! I'd forgotten all about Mighty Max! Too amazing for words.

Dex, we like all the same stuff, how cool is that?

A cartoon network holiday? You're on.

Dex said...

I know, how cool are we? Actually, don't answer that.

You know how excited you were, thinking about the 2 of us running a cinema. Well, I'm probably that kind of excited thinking about a cartoon network holiday.

Louise said...

The fact that we aren't cool makes me like us even more.

That's what we would do when the cinema was taking a break, we'd take one too and find a different place to venture to every time for our cartoon network-fest.

That would be an almighty tradition.

Dex said...

'We're not cool. We just do cool things.'

Dex & Lilly

I'm worried I might be disturbing your nightime ritual of music, films & books?

I really should go to bed.

Louise said...

Never, Dexterous. I'm still watching tv because i'm so wide awake.

We actually sound like a cartoon, Dex & Lilly.

I think you should sleep though, you have to remain the regular sleeper out of the two of us. You're my early rising role model!

Dex said...

I'm actually helping out at Mareel tomorrow - some holiday!

As always, it's been a pleasure conversing with you.

Goodnight Lilly, my fantabulous friend - I'm so happy we're friends :)

Time to fight some crime (I'm trying to turn it into a catchphrase).

Louise said...

Bless, they just can't do without you. You are the glue that keeps the Shetlands' movie world together. Masterful.

Wouldn't it be, 'Time to sleep-fight some crime'?
Stop me if i'm being too pernickety.

G'night Dex, we'll have a detailed run through of cuts and bruises tomorrow...cause we fight hard! Or just fall down a lot :)

Dex said...

Time to sleep-fight some crime.

:)

Louise said...

Attaboy!

:)

Dex said...

Hi Lilly

Are you okay?

What were you feeling anxious about?

I'm in Mareel, wishing you were here. Apparently, they have chai tea (not sure if they can make it up in latte form. Must ask).

Louise said...

It needs sugar...trust me.

I'm okay, just feeling a little suffocated as of late, sometimes it gets the better of me. I wake up every day feeling guilty and useless because it's so late in the afternoon...but i'm so tired.

Ugh, i'm a whinge-bag. I just need to watch some Mighty Max and go outside. And get my daily dose of Dex of course.

How's Mareel? What wonders are you showing just now?

Dex said...

Well, I get up early and go to work, and I still feel the same.

The things you do late into the night and into the early morning, I reckon I could do them with you and be happy :)

What's your garden like, Lilly? Is it quite pretty?

Films at Mareel:

Lincoln
The Impossible
Hyde Park on Hudson
Flight
False Trail
Hit So Hard
Roman Holiday
Les Miserables
Quartet
Zero Dark Thirty
Argo
Hotel Transylvania
Texas Chainsaw
Cirque Du Soleil
Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks Same
The Sessions

Some unusual films in there. What are we thinking?

Louise said...

http://www.blipfoto.com/entry/555665

That is the closest i could get to a picture of our garden and i take photos of it practically all summer, every summer. So, you get my Mistycat and some dirt. Hah. Sorry about that. I'll take a photo in late Spring, when everything's in bloom again, just for you.

That's my sister's blipfoto by the way, she takes nice photos, better ones than i, take a gander!
I love the word 'gander'. It sounds exactly like what it means. Almost onomatopoeic.

My dearest Dex, i think you have a rose-tinted view of me. Remember, i'm a cantankerous, curmudgeonly, bed-ridden mess. I think you'd get bored quite easily doing nothing with me. Although, maybe you'd spur me on to have more adventures.

Mareel's film list is not bad, not bad at all. Some i want to see, some i hadn't heard of and one i'm completely baffled by.
'Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks The Same'?
Really? I'm sorry, i just can't let you get away with that one. What are you Shetlanders into?!

Dex said...

LGBT Festival

Lesbian
Gay
Bisexual
Transgender

Why that particular film, I have no idea.

I wanted 'The Birdcage'. I know, but that's just me.

I took a 'gander' at your sister's page. She really does take lovely photos. Do you and your sisters all bake?

Whatya doin' tonight you my curmudgeonly friend?

P.S. - listening to 'Rumours'.

Louise said...

Should of rallied for The Birdcage. Robin Williams and Hank Azaria really do give great homosexual. What about the all-time wonder that is Priscilla Queen of the Desert?

I do not bake, i've tried and i just don't have the patience. I can make pancakes though, like your fine self. My eldest sister bakes like a maniac. She just made raspberry ripple ice cream (i know that's not baking but meh) and it's so good i would happily go out in a blaze of glory consuming it. Throw in some bread beforehand and i'll be a happy duck.

It's so temping to use the Pinky and the Brain speech again...but i'm not taking over the world, just changing the sheets on my bed and surfing the web for new treasures. I totally just rocked your brainpan with my awesomeness just then, didn't i?

I demand stories.

Dex said...

Okay, please don't hate me for this, but 'Priscilla, Queen of the Desert' was on at Mareel last week as part of the LGBT Festival, and I missed it.

I'm very sorry.

Changing the sheets, surfing the web...just remember that Bilbo Baggins wasn't doing anything particularly exciting when Gandalf knocked on his door.

Stories, hmm. I'll have a think about that after I've finished 'Rumours'. Is it wrong that I go a little gooey inside when Christine McVie sings to me of miracles and magic?

Stories, hmm. I'll have a think about that after I've finished off 'Rumours'.

Watching anything tonight?

Dex said...

Why the hell did I write the same sentence twice :(

Louise said...

You my friend are allowed to go gooey inside whenever you wish whilst listening to Rumours. It's the done thing, after all.

Have you seen Priscilla before? If not, get it done, son. Agent Smith as a transvestite is just beyond mind-altering.

I am currently listening to The Prodigy remix of Jay-Z's 99 Problems. Quite possibly the polar opposite of the Mac but it's soooo good. I'm not cool.

Instead of Gandalf, i choose you to knock on my door and send me in search of grumpy dragons with curmudgeonly dwarves - my people, 5ft almost 3. Practically dwarf height?

Tonight is Utopia night! Penultimate episode and i'm super excited. Have you been watching it?

Dex said...

I think we've agreed that we're both not cool, but that it's okay :)

I've never seen Priscilla. Or Utopia. I haven't seen a lot of things. Tell me at the end if Utopia was worth it.

Well, I'd be joining you on your quest. I'm only 5'5 on a good day. That's another reason I hate going out, getting id'd for everything.

Does it ever bother you that you have no idea what I look like?

I take back my 'mehing' of Rumours. I'm not sure if I could fall in love with it, but it's full of lovely moments.

Louise said...

I'm curious i guess but i wouldn't say it's ever 'bothered' me. You could look like a Critter and it wouldn't make a difference - granted i'd have the urge to pet you but i would be fearful for my fingers, so would refrain - you'd be still Dexterous, my partner in crime.

Right, so we've both come around to albums we've both previously meh'd. What's next?

Louise said...

'You'd be still Dexterous..."

wtf, am i Yoda?

"You'd still be Dexterous..."

Dex said...

I don't know. Anything and everything. We have time :)

I usually have a cup of tea with my family at about this time. Talk about leading an exciting life.

What kind of tea do you drink at home?

Dex said...

Well you did post that picture of Kermit & Yoda. Does that make me Kermit?

Louise said...

Hah, i make tea for my dad, eldest sister and i at about 10:30pm. You and I? We're tremendous.

I drink nothing but tea. Mostly black leaf tea.

Raspberry
Mango
Blackcurrant and Acai
Earl Grey and Lavender
Apple and Pear green tea
Oatflower, Lime and chamomile
Chamomile
Chai

I used to drink earl grey with milk and sugar...which is twisted but it tasted way better than Tetley and the like. My uni friends gave me the weirdest look when i would lob an Earl Grey teabag into my mug, as if i was murdering kittens or something. People are weird.
Saying that, i think it tastes awful now. My taste for kittens has obviously been quieted.

And you drink?

We're actually discussing tea. I love that.

Dex said...

I'm the one who makes the tea too. We are indeed tremendous.

What kind of tea? Whatever my family brings back from the weekly shop. We're not very adventurous.

Milk and 2 sugars, though.

We do have some Tanzanian tea that my parents brought back from their holiday in, yep, Tanzania. But it takes too much effort to make tea when it's not in a bag.

Ooh, and we're members of the 'Chocolate Tasting Club'. So exclusive :) So we have a chocolate every night.

Good gravy, do I need a wizard to come and kick my arse out the door.

Enjoy Utopia.

Louise said...

If only i could get accepted to the Unseen University for wizards, i could kick both our arses and people would envy the adventurous day we were born. Which is awesomely, the same day! :)

You've made me want something sugary...


Oh, we drink our tea exactly the same...you're definitely my long lost brethren...but i'm probably the evil one, you're way nice than i am.

Brother from another mother! Literally just popped into my head and now i feel desperately lame.

Dex said...

Brother from another mother :) Even I'm not gonna try and make you feel better about that one.

Hah, your knowledge of werewolf films is beyond amazing.

Ginger Snaps - Emily Perkins - just had to be in there somewhere.

There was an episode of Mighty Max with a werewolf that utterly terrified me as a child.

Louise said...

Her mini cameo in Juno made me ever so happy. I'm rather fond of Katherine Isabelle as well, really want to see American Mary but i'm trying to curb my Amazon habit. I have a sickness.
They were both in Supernatural - excuse me while i freak the fangirl out.

I found this great website for werewolf movies by decade and i'm really tempted to try and watch them all. The good ones at least. The same for vampire/zombie/creaturefeature movies. That is quite possibly a real waste of time but i can't seem to care...

Mighty Max terrifying you - that is what cartoons are missing these days. So many cartoons/kids films scarred me for life but in a good way, in the way that means i want to search them out and relive the terror!

Do you watch as much creepy stuff as i do?
Have you seen Cabin in the Woods?
I have not :( Amazon addiction is again preventing me.

Dex said...

I quite like being 'creeped'. Do you ever watch those late night Japanese/Korean films they sometimes show on Film 4. Y'know, the type that tend to get remade by Hollywood studios.

What's your take on trashy horror films (basically drunk teens getting slaughtered)? Yay or nay? I have to admit, they are sometimes a guilty pleasure of mine :(

Louise said...

Yay and indeed, sometimes nay. House of Wax is a true guilty pleasure. Anything where Paris Hilton gets maimed is enjoyable.

The Host. End of story. I think they're making another one, which is too awesome for words.

Dex said...

I'll tell you a film they should remake - 'The Most Dangerous Game'. Count Zaroff luring people to his island and hunting them for sport.

Okay, so it's basically Predator.

Whatya watchin' now?

Louise said...

The end of Die Hard. I never get tired of Holly McClane punching William Atherton in the piehole. So satisfying.

I...have never seen The Most Dangerous Game but i imdb'd it and you're completely right and i think you should do it. Who would you cast as Count Zaroff? Who else has such malevolent eyebrows? Donald Sutherland?

Dex said...

I am so proud of you, Lilly!

Punched and zapped by Holly McClane, zinged by Peter Venkman, and arrested for murder by both Adrian Monk & Jessica Fletcher. Does it ever end well for William Atherton?

Hmm, Count Zaroff - Alan Rickman. Admittedly because I've just been watching Die Hard. I'm sure he could pull of gentlemanly game hunting baddery.

I don't know why I have such a thing for game hunters - Count Zaroff, Robert Muldoon, Van Pelt. Hmm.

I've moved onto American Dad. I'm slightly obsessed. I must have seen this episode a million times. What do you think of American Dad and other cartoons of its ilk?

Louise said...

Die Hard watching aside, Alan Rickman is the epitome of malevolence so i reckon you're onto a winner.
The original Zaroff is reminding me of General Zod in the pictures i'm finding.

"Kneel before Zod!'

Sha'n't.

Michael Shannon isn't gonna say that in Man of Steel. Kind of disappointed...

How do you feel about the child-catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang?
Goodness, he still gives me nightmares.

American Dad for eternity and beyond. I love it so much more than i Family Guy now, which is actually really sad cause FG was a life-changer. My favourite right now is probably Bob's Burgers and Archer though. I cannot get enough of Louise, she's so reprehensible and i love it!

Dex said...

For some reason, I never saw Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

Seeing the child-catcher for the first time when you're in your twenties is probably less likely to mentally scar you.

I suppose I was one of the lucky few.

Ursula from The Little Mermaid however...

Do you own a pink bunny hat?

You like hats, don't you?

Louise said...

I dunno, he's truly bloody scary but i guess you're right.
How could you have not seen CCBB???? I thought it was like a rite of passage every kid went through.

Utopia just hit me with a hugely important piece of information and i'm actually reeling. I refuse to wait for the last episode to recommend this show to you, it's the best thing i've seen in a long, long while. Truly.

Ursula scared me too. The finale with the storm and booming voice...jesus.
Unfortunately i don't have a pink bunny hat. That fact actually makes me sad. I do own purple bunny ears though...they're for children...

Do you like hats?

A weird fact: when i wear hats i get headaches from the pressure. How fucking ridiculous.

Dex said...

Do you mean information important to unravelling the plot?

I don't wear hats. I used to wear one, but it fell out of my pocket one day and a car ran over it!

That is a weird fact. So do you own hats, but just not wear them?

Louise said...

Yeah, kinda, i wear them for about 10 minutes, take it off and then do the whole thing over again because i'm a masochist.
I have three top hats, one is miniature.

This must have been a very important hat for you to never wear one again...was it a wizard's hat?

Dex said...

Is there much call for wearing top hats down your way?

Shetland's a bit too windy for hats. You'd need a spell to keep it on year head.

Did you make pancakes today?

Louise said...

I forgot. Typical behaviour. My sister and I will probably make them in a few days. I like to flip them.
Did you?

Top hats are an always kind of hat you silly beastie.

What you up to Dex? I want details.

14621 said...

I didn't make them either. I remembered but Pancake Day is any day really.

I don't flip :( no courage. I need my trusty fish slice.

I'm in the living room. Channel hopping again. I thought I might watch a DVD.

Does your house have a lot of books? I'm guessing it does :) So does mine. I should read more.

Have you retired to your bedroom?

Dex said...

Aaaah, I must be losing my mind. I wrote the number they ask for to prove I'm not a robot in the user id :)

Louise said...

That is quite obviously your replicant number. Freudian computer slip!

I am indeed bedroom bound. Bed bound in fact. I think i'm actually gonna try and sleep after i've finished listening to this song:

http://open.spotify.com/track/55CenVQ4alvDJ1PS8aYB0m

What film do you reckon? I vote something of the sci-fi/fantasy genre.

My house has so many books i doubt i'll ever be able to read them all. What do you like to read? Would you like suggestions?

Dex said...

Are you feeling sleepy? These things can wait 'til tomorrow.

I thought I might watch some early Red Dwarf - that's sort of sci-fi.

The last book I read was 'Around The World In 80 Days'. By Jules Verne, not the BBC companion to Michael Palin's tv series.

What should I read next, Lilly?

Louise said...

Red Dwarf is totally sci-fi. They're in space, Dex...

I can't bring myself to watch the new series. It might break my Arnold Rimmer-loving heart.

I am sleepy, so i think i will retire or y'know just lie down! But first i suggest you read...

Ian McEwan 'The Comfort of Strangers'

Night Dex, you delightful dilettante.

Alliteration is the way forward.

Dex said...

Night, night Lilly

Dex said...

I felt a little bit down after our conversation last night. I still can't shake off this feeling of emptiness inside of me. You're too far away.

Maybe it's just the weather. It's so miserable up here today. I had hoped for some sun so I could take a few photographs for you (if you wouldn't mind).

That was very sweet, what you said yesterday, about not caring whether I looked like a Critter or not. You really are the loveliest girl.

How goes the window display?

Louise said...

To emphasis my point, i shall confess that the Critters Boxset is currently sitting quite contently in my amazon wishlist waiting for me to buy it. Critters are awesome.

I hope i didn't abandon you last night m'dear, t'was not my intention at all. Did you end up watching Red Dwarf? How come you went to sleep later than I and you're still writing a message to me before i'm even awake?! Are you practising the dark sleepy arts? I think you are.

I would be overjoyed to receive photos of where you live Dexterous, it'll give me a good idea of what i'll be visiting one day. Getting me on a boat however, may be a bit of a problem...they sink, y'know?
Next sunny day, photograph the hell out of Lerwick for me.

It's snowmageddon in Blair again. Silly country.

I think my sister put the window display in already but i'm too afraid to ask because i was useless and didn't help really at all...i suck just now. I'll see if i can get photos from her so you can revel in the puke-worthy number of hearts currently infesting my dad's practice.

And i'd like you to remember my Dexterous friend, you're a smasher and i'd be very bored without you.

Dex said...

Do you still have Leprechaun sitting in your wishlist?

Don't worry, I didn't feel abandoned. Anyway, I had Arnold Judas Rimmer to keep me company.

I'm such a complainer. I'll try to remember that I'm also a smasher (and a delightful dilettante).

I see Die Hard 2 is on tonight.

Louise said...

Complaining must be in everyone's top 5 things to do, it's so satisfying. Anyhow, you can complain to me as much as you like...as long as you'll return the favour?

I'd forgotten his middle name was Judas. Your wisdom is infinite.
I always get really surprised when i see The Cat in Blade 2. It's like a completely different person, he actually seems more human as a vampire...a testament to how awesomely messed up The Cat was.

"I've seen mirrors, I have eyes. Let's face it, buddy. I have a body that makes men wet."

Love.

I might be watching Die Hard 2...then again, i may not be...

Dex said...

What did you do the last time you left Blairgowrie?

The last time I left Shetland, I went to stay with my cousin in Aberdeen.

Didn't do much except go to Waterstones, HMV & Starbucks.

I came home with the Curb Your Enthusiasm box set and a bunch of Belle and Sebastian CDs.

Here are some random songs I listened to today (apart from the songs on your blog, obviously):

The Mother We Share - Chvrches
Vireo's Eye - Future Islands
This Aching Deal - Shocking Pinks
Best Day Of My Life - American Authors (heard it on an advert)
One Fine Day - Chiffons (a bit of a leap, I know)

Louise said...

All those songs are getting listened to before i sleep tonight. Just because.

To think, if i'd never moved away from Aberdeen then we may have crossed paths at some point. Tremendous shame that.
I think we just found another band you'll have to try your very hardest to get me to like. Belle and Sebastian make me queazy...don't disown me!

Last time i left Blair, i went to Edinburgh and indulged in buying an unhealthy number of books. My favourite thing to do.

Maybe my tone-dar is off but you sound a tad gloomy...you're not, are you dearest?

Didn't watch Die Hard 2. The parents were watching this thing about surgeons and it sucked me in and then broke my heart. Tv keeps doing that! Now we're onto The Book of Eli...which i quite like. Gary Oldman - forever.

Dex said...

For some reason, I'm not feeling particularly Eeyorish at the moment. You're very sweet for asking, though.

You're not feeling Eeyorish, are you?

I never watched Die Hard 2 either. Parents still in the living room.

Do you know, I'm still totally obsessed with Rivers by Black City Lights. Also, just a level below that, 99 Stairs, Shyness, The Door Was White...actually too many more to name.

I won't disown you for Belle and Sebastian. I won't even refrain from glomping you, if the opportunity should ever arise.

But at least give me the opportunity to return the favour. Tell me a band you love that you think I'll 'meh'.

Louise said...

I don't think River is ever going to go away for me, it's just one of those songs.
I'm glad i've introduced you to songs you now love, that makes me immeasurably happy.
Have you heard Fever Ray, 'When I Grow Up'?
You should watch the video if you haven't, it's dreamy and wonderful.

I have to start watching music videos again, there are so many good ones out there that i don't see because music channels are so...mainstream.

A band you might 'meh' - The Police.

Grew up listening to them, 'Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic' was the song i always asked to listen to in the car when we went on trips. Along with Crowded House, 'Weather With You'.

It amazes me how many people abhor The Police.

Dex said...

You're right, I probably would 'meh' The Police, but I don't know them well enough.

Something to add to my list.

You're right about another thing too - that Fever Ray video.

I don't really watch music videos either. Did you know Victoria Bergsman did a video for New Order's Temptation (I'm sorry, did I just hear you just say 'meh')?

Here's a show I was obsessed with for a little while in my teens:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6zDfxZ4NcE

The Cure - yay or nay?

Louise said...

See, you compliment me all the time and put yourself down for not being interesting or 'cool' but i'd never even heard of Cowboy Bebop before and now i'm just about desperate to watch it all. Feed my need for culty goodness Dex, i beg you! I need educated.

The Cure - yay but for short periods of time. For some reason, there are bands that i can listen to a few songs of and then just get really pissed off. The Cure is one of them. I can't explain why.

Here's one that'll really make you go 'meh' - Paramore. My go-to sing my guts out band. I secretly wish i could be Hayley Williams. Go on, 'meh' me, i know you're just dying to.

Dex said...

I have my moments.

Dr Strangelove - if your sister quotes from that film, then she's alright by me.

"I do not avoid women Mandrake, but I do deny them my essence."

Paramore - I understand. That's all I'm saying.

'cough' Halo 'cough' Texas. They did a music video that was based on the film Chungking Express (have you seen it) but I can't find it anymore. Boo.

Isn't it kinda wonderful that we like different things? We can educate each other.

The Cure - yay. But like you said, there's a limit.

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