wes

According to The Atlantic Wire this is what my favourite Wes Anderson movie says about me:

'You are an old soul. Your family, while small, is in no small way dysfunctional, thank goodness, because the worst thing in the world, the worst, would be to have a boring family. Or an ugly one. You would never watch TV in the bathtub for fear of electrocution, but you would and have read many a book, regardless of the damaged pages that ensue, regardless of whether said book came from the library. But mostly you buy books; you like their smell, you smell them often. Your friends describe you as "loyal," "good-natured," and "quirky," with "pretty hair." One time at a ski lodge you tripped on a serving tray while playing Tetris and only just barely avoided stitches and had to get one of those butterfly bandages right on the side of your face, to hold the skin together while it healed. You went from "talented and gifted" to slightly less talented in the year between fourth and fifth grade. Sometimes you throw around the word "twee," and when drunk, you speak with the intercontinental accent of '60s-era movie stars. Astrological sign: Pisces.'

This is scarily accurate for many reasons:

My family is small, most definitely dysfunctional and in no way boring...mostly due to our dysfunctionality and sick sense of humour.

I would never watch tv in the bathtub unless i wanted to die a shocking death.

(not sorry for the terrible pun)

I have read many, many books and i sniff them on the regular.

I have pretty hair no matter what you say.

(indulge me)

I walked into a roughcast wall whilst at primary school and required butterfly stitches, i was extremely proud of them.

(they still make me smile when i think of that day)

I was okay at art until i reached high school where i..."blossomed" and then i kinda flunked out of university.

(technically there was no flunking, my brain just ate itself and i had to leave...)

When drunk i have been known to bust out a west country accent.

(it's terrible but sublime whilst intoxicated)

I have an astrological sign.

(okay, i might be reaching here)

Fuck yeah, i'm a Tenenbaum.