august

September 01, 2023

Things I enjoyed in the month of August:

Ilona Andrews', Magic Tides:

[Spoilers be lurking]

My husband walked out of the north tower and jogged over to us. He was almost six feet tall, with blond hair and gray eyes, and he was built like a champion grappler in his prime. The two men instinctively stepped aside to make room for him.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” I told him.

“What’s going on?”

“Paul’s nephew has been kidnapped by a local gang. About 50 people. I’m going to get him back.”

Curran grinned at me. “Will you be home in time for dinner?”

Paul and Thomas looked at him like he had lost his mind.

“Naah.  Eat without me.”  I stretched my shoulders a bit, gave him a quick hug, and headed to our bedroom.

“Red Horn kills people,” Thomas said behind my back. “Your wife…”

“Will enjoy the exercise,” my husband said. “You know what they say. Happy wife, happy life.”



...
There are overgrown sea creatures in this and I was NOT PREPARED.
Spirited Away Gif - IceGif

Fair play to House Andrews, they did make it fairly obvious by calling the new Kate novella, Magic Tides, so really I had absolutely no right to be shocked when Poseidon's offspring started poking their bulbous heads out of the sea to take a chunk out of my beloved Kate.
It's right there in the title.
Only an idiot wouldn't see it (hi, I'm Idiot).
But for some reason (me, I'm the reason) it simply didn't register, I didn't even contemplate it.
Tentacles, teeth, and squirmy, squiggly things aplenty - a recipe of shudders for any Megalahydrothalassaphobe - were not on my radar, not even a tiny bit.
I figured we'd be dealing with Kate and Curran's usual supernatural lot of demigods, whatever's crawled out of Wilmington's equivalent of Unicorn Lane, and daddy Daniels' tantrum of the week, just... bicoastal, instead of the heart of Atlanta.
...
Note to future readers: never try and predict House Andrews, they live to fuck you up.
Which is how I found myself making this face when a hungry baby Kraken splashily appeared around two thirds of the way through and thought, ooh, she looks tasty, let's eat this one!:
No Way Shaking Head GIF by Schitt's Creek

I repeat:

NOT PREPARED.

Yuck, yuck, fuckity yuck.
I don't do sea creatures, especially not gi-fucking-normous ones, and we've never gone there with HA before.
Dragons? Yes. Overgrown Jaws? Thankfully not!
It's been blissful.
Until now.
We made it so long, HA, why would you forsake me now?
Friends GIF

However.
This is my favourite Urban Fantasy series, and my top series of all-time alongside a couple of others, so I can forgive HA basically anything, including many-legged slimers.
I can, I really can, because y'know what? I'm just so happy to be home, in a new home, with my Atlantan parentals.
There's a certain level of devastation that comes with loving a set of fictional characters so completely and your time with them coming to an end before you're ready.
(If I could, I would read them eternally, but alas, that would involve indentured servitude and that involves too much paperwork)
Sure, they'll always be there, safely ensconced in the pages, living their happy ever after, patiently waiting for you to pay another visit.
It's why I love being physically surrounded by books; e-readers are fantastic, and my Kindle app sees a ton of action, but the fact that Kate and her rabble perpetually sit in permanent residence by the side of my bed, always in reach in case I need them is a level of comfort that's hard to quantify.
Think the end of Labyrinth and you'll know what I mean.
#labyrinth from i'm with you til the end of the line.

There may never be any new stories, but they'll always exist in their own little world at my side until I decide otherwise (I'll never decide otherwise).
How fucking wonderful is that?
Alas, the fact still stands that their static, piled existence is an inescapable end; until the author says otherwise (or you scour AO3 for goodies).
Lucky for me and the rest of the BDH (Book Devouring Horde, for the uninitiated; we have a whole dedicated section in HA's merch store because they love us that much... or we're that feral, it's unconfirmed), HA seem to be as capable of leaving Kate behind about as easily as the rest of us, and thus, two new novellas were born, with a third on the way.
Some (more) Gravity Falls gifs - Album on Imgur

And in true Kate fashion, HA waste no time getting stuck into the action, it's simply *kid runs in* Hey lady! Some supernaturally juiced up dickhead kidnapped some beloved people for nefarious means, could you fetch them back for us?! We'd pay, but you get weird about payment, so we'll just be eternally grateful and worship you and stuff, even though it makes you horribly uncomfortable! 'K, thanks, bye!
And then they "steal" all Kate's cookies!
...
All those exclamation points were absolutely necessary, because that's exactly how it goes! Every time! And it's bliss!
(I'll stop)
I love, love, love that HA do this, that they don't mess around, don't draw out the lead up with unnecessary exposition for the sake of word count, whilst simultaneously refusing to sacrifice the mystery of whatever puzzle Kate's puzzling out, so being thrust into the action straight away doesn't feel like a let down.
Dear reader, it never does.
I will happily be thrown into whatever situation HA wants to yeet me into at the start of any book they write (especially Kate, though), because I know it will undoubtedly be an excellent fucking time with well thought out plot, and quips aplenty.
Kate's never failed me, not once, and with Magic Tides her streak continues.
...
Even with the oceanic monstrosities, as much they give me full body shudders.
And how does she continue to do this?
There's so many reasons, and if you're already a fan of the KD world, then you're familiar with the way HA write, with their strong, lovable characters, the world-building, the endless supply of creatures, the magical lore, the overall story arc, the humour, the violence, the love, etc.
They really do pack a punch with their storytelling, and I've been in love with it since the first page of Magic Bites (not being hyperbolic, I remember specifically dropping the book onto my chest and taking a moment to just revel in the high of finding a novel soulmate), but it wasn't until Magic Tides that I truly took account of Kate Daniels-Asskicker-Lennart being the definition of Competence Porn.
She never flinches, she's a fount of mythical knowledge, shows no fear, is utterly capable, and it's hot. as. fuck.


I climbed to the deck and almost collided with a heavy-set man carrying a big club.
"What do you want?"
"I'm here to see Aaron."
"The fuck you are!"
He swung the club. I swept his legs out from under him and shoved him left. He made a lovely splash.


How could it have taken me ten books and a novella to see this, you ask?
It didn't, I've always known, how could I not've when she's knocked down every wall blocking her way, defeated every enemy, wiggled her way out of some truly slippery situations, and taunted the Beast Lord on their very first meeting and not only lived ("Here, kitty, kitty.") but married him.
She's a badass through and through, I'd follow that woman into battle no questions asked.
(She would, however, not ask me, she would instead gently tell me to get my ass down into the basement with a box of my biscuit of choice, a stack of books, and wait until the action was over because when you put plasters on paper cuts, you don't get to stab enemies with super pointy swords)
But now she's settled, happy, dare I say peaceful, even.
Dearest dad's locked up, no one's building towers in her name, and the Pack aren't breathing down her neck every second of the day.
(Anyone else confused over Jim's descent into superior prickdom? It doesn't feel right. He's always been a rule follower and stern to a fault, but would he really cut off Curran? Would Dali let him? I feel like there's foul play afoot and HA are trying to tell us something)
Life is good, and it shows.
This version of Kate, who's obviously a decade older than where we left her in Magic Triumphs, is more self-assured, more at ease with her position in life, and confident in her family to both look after themselves, her, and whoever happens to be in their proximity.
That weight she carried through the entirety of the series, that constant fear of everything being snatched from her which resulted in lack of complete trust even between her and Curran, just isn't there anymore.
Poof, gone, not even a whiff of doubt.
She can saunter off to fight mutant cephalopods and puny humans with godly designs without having to worry that Conlan might need her, that Curran's going to start snacking on animal gods again (the wings were cool, not gonna lie), or that the world's going to fall down if she's not there to prop it up.
I think, collectively (I'm looking at you BDH), that this is everything we ever wanted for Kate and the fam.
Safety, happiness, togetherness.
We've gone from Kate drinking alone in her house with no allies in sight, to baking cookies in her fortress-like mansion by the sea before kissing Curran and Conlan goodbye and popping off to defeat a Demi-god for the good of the community.
And being home for dinner.
That's the dream, and fuck, if it isn't satisfying.
Magic Tides is almost a Slice of Life chapter in the Daniels-Lennart story, something I never thought I'd describe my supernatural chaos babies of being able to even contemplate, let alone live.
As far as mundanity goes, this is it for them, and I couldn't be more grateful that House Andrews took time out of their schedule to give us, the readers, their loudest champions, the goblins who'll do our very best to keep them writing eternally, a little more time with our favourite UF parents.
Do I wish Kate and Curran had physically been together more in the book? Always, yes, of course, it's my preferred state of their beings.
Did it make for a better story to unglue them for a hundred pages or so? Begrudgingly, yes.
Can I forgive HA for this sensical narrative decision? Unequivocally.
Because there's another, longer, novella after this one.
And another after that.
And who knows how many more.
I can forgive Ilona and Gordon anything.
...
Except maybe the giant octopus at the end of the book, that was uncool, I'd like my land monsters back, please.
Adventure Time Gif Database


Sidebar for Hugh "BDE" D'ambray, the king of my morally grey-loving heart:


I dialed Hugh's number. The phone rang. And rang. And rang. . .
There was a click and Hugh's voice said, "Yes?"
"It's me."
"Everything okay?"
"Yeah. Did you know the bone-breaking command can explode krakens?"
"Yes."
What the hell. "And you didn't tell me?"
He laughed into the phone. "Is Wilmington still standing?"
"Last I checked."
[...]
"Does your wife know of any water gods active around Wilmington?"
"Why is that any time a freaky deity pops up somewhere, all of you call my wife?"
"Do you really want me to answer that question?"
". . . Good point. Hold on. I'll ask."
I held the phone away from my ear.
"HEY, HONEY? DO YOU KNOW ABOUT ANY WATER GODS IN WILMINGTON?"
How Elara put up with him I would never know. Then again, I married a man who occasionally turned into a lion in his sleep, so I had no room to judge. I finished my Danish.
"She says she doesn't know of anything recent. With Wilmington being an international port, it's hard to say."
"Please tell her thank you."
"A lot of Irish in Wilmington," Hugh said.
"Yeah. I've been thinking about that."
"It could be a god or it could be something else, and either way, it's likely dangerous. Watch yourself."
"Thanks for the pep talk."
"Whatever you do, don't feed it to Curran."
"Ha-ha."
"Call me if you need help. Gods know you could use it."
"If I did call you, what would you do? You've gone soft in your country lord life, in your keep, with your wife baking delicious desserts for you and your gang of children."
"That's good. I'll remind you of that next time you call. And by the way, you can call even when you don't need something. And you can visit."
"I know. Take care."
"You too."


...
I love their step-sibling dynamic so fucking much.
Dont Touch Me Big Brother GIF by CBC


And Kate's Labyrinth moment:


The magic swelled inside me, thrilled to be unleashed, as if it had been waiting for permission all along. I pushed, directing it to my throat, focusing all my power on it.
Estene areD dair.
My magic collided with the creature lodged inside me. I strained, pushing hard, harder, through the blinding pain, through the instinctual panic, shaping my magic, wrapping the obstruction in it.
Pushing harder. Harder. Harder . . .
I came loose. The water around me broke. I gagged and spat out a tiny glowing jellyfish.
The words of a long-forgotten language spilled out on their own, crackling with power.
"ESTENE ARED DAIR." You have no power over me.
The chains snapped, fracturing into a thousand pieces, and evaporated.


I honestly can't tell if this was purposeful or not, but The Princess Bride is Kate's favourite novel, so it's not that far-fetched that she's seen David Bowie at his finest.
I'm taking it as canon. Fight me.
No You Have No Power Over Me GIF - No You Have No Power Over Me - Discover & Share GIFs

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Laia LĆ³pez and this dynamic:

...
Thats-the-one GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

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Good Omens season two:

...
I can't talk about it.
(A lot because I'm a fucking mess)
There's too many spoilers.
(SO many)
I just can't do it.
(aka. I could, but I won't because I'm spoilers are the worst unless chosen)
To those who've watched it, you know.
I KNOW.
I know you know.
Because we're all part of the sob-fest that's happening the galaxy over.
A celestial choir of abject fucking misery.
The howling goblin in the soprano section? That's me, hi.
Just falling apart because of three stupid fucking words.
Crowley, angry at Aziraphale, telling himself in the streets of Soho, “Just breathe, that’s what humans do. And then they count to ten before they do anything stupid.”

My ineffable friends, I feel your pain.
And to the rest of you?
Please watch it.
Even if it's just background noise and you pay no attention, please, please, please get its numbers up so we don't have to exist in a world without a third season.
I can't live in this hell for eternity.
image
image
image
image

If you need me, I'll be falling down a twitter theory k-hole whilst watching the series on repeat with the sound of Crowley clearing his throat mid-declaration ringing in my ears until the third season's green-lit.
It's what's happening, I have no control over the situation, I'm no more happy than anyone else.

Here's some fanart while I cry myself hoarse - the rest will come in due course once my hands stop screaming bloody murder:
Man Luo

Kyra Kupetsky

gemennair

aneh

Masao

Fiona Lopez

stargezza

Frey

venia

blairamok

auro

chemdoodles

time-woods

eldritchmoon

noobsy

Isadora Zeferino

Isabelle Schernus

Alba H.

Spooky Sal

Holly Jameson

Kloekap

Ginger

ohmsnwattsonart

okayloki

solitudee

Bowen McCurdy

waterlouper

Ena Sexton

Lu

That's all for now. More soon!

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Sidamarink's cinnamon roll OCs:

I'm obsessed.
Their cute little faces and how obviously they're into each other.
Give me a cinnamon roll tall/broad boy and a sunshine plus-size heroine, and I'm the happiest goblin around.
And Sidamarink's developing them for Webtoons under the name Sunset Villa.
...
Queen Staring GIF by The Drew Barrymore Show


Speaking of plus-size romance, here's another to squish your heart into goo:
https://vanessagillings.tumblr.com/post/723286142850629632/another-one-of-this-girl-this-time-with-her-boy
https://vanessagillings.tumblr.com/post/723916223099895808/thank-you-for-the-sweet-response-you-gave-these
Vanessa Gillings

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Goblin watches:
The goblins from The Labyrinth | Laberinto pelicula, Laberintos, Jim henson

I knew as soon as I'd finished reading Not Good For Maidens that I needed a refresher on all my goblin and goblin-adjacent faves.
Some are outright Goblin Market-eqsue, and others are purely a goblin vibe.
I have my reasons.
You'll see:
Legend

Maybe I'm biased because this movie became my entire personality the moment I watched it when I was a shorter version of myself (not that much shorter) and still too innocent to realise - but totally realised in the back of my underdeveloped brainpan - Tim Curry as Darkness was absolute filth...
You Pierce My Soul — TIM CURRY as the Lord of Darkness in Legend (1985)...
Ridley Scott's “Legend” (1985) is Iconic – On the Screen Reviews

...but Legend is exactly how I imagine Faerie would look.
The definition, in fact.
Sparkly, lush with wild flowers, splendidly bright in some places, Stygianly dark in others, and above all, infested with winged critters who'll as soon take a bite out of you as they would smile sweetly - often simultaneously.
Tim Curry as Lord of Darkness, Legend, 1985 - GIFs - Imgur

It's perfect.
Perfect, perfect, perfect.
If there isn't a goblin market somewhere in that forest, I'll never look thirstily at Darkness' biceps again.


A Midsummer Night's Dream

Oberon and Titania, the OG King and Queen of Faerie will of course take royal day trips to the market.
...
For the potions that keep them eternally hot, obviously.
A Midsummer Nights Dream Michelle Pfeiffer GIF - A Midsummer Nights Dream Michelle Pfeiffer GIFs
sunoficarus: ““Oberon and Puck from A Midsummer Night’s Dream (1999) ” ”


The Slipper and the Rose

I'm 1000% sure Annette Crosbie's fairy godmother would take one look at the goblin market and scold its occupants into tidying their shit up, getting her a damn seat (the Market Prince's throne being the obvious choice), and schooling them on the perfect cup of tea.
She'd rule that market.
The Slipper And The Rose - Tumblr Gallery

One thousand percent.
Scared shitless would be the goblins' new state of being.


The Company of Wolves

Maybe it's just my brain but all fairy tales happen in the same place in my head.
Be it an English wood, an Irish valley, a Scottish glen, or even an American forest, Egyptian desert, a French village or the Norwegian tundra.
They're all connected.
My very own continent of stories.
And I fully believe Angela Carter's big bad wolf inhabited forest would have a goblin market entangled underneath.
She is the high queen of fairy tales, after all.
The Company Of Wolves-


The Black Cauldron

You see this little fucker?
The Black Cauldron - The Horned King's Death - The Final battle on Make a GIF

Kicked out of the market for being too much a snivelling little shit.

Sidenote: ACoTaR was inspired by The Chronicles of Prydain, hence her use of the cauldron; I can't remember if goblins featured in Maas' tale, but it was rife with the fae, so I wouldn't be surprised if Nesta and Cassian took a sneaky visit.
Feyre and Rhys wouldn't approve.


Wolfwalkers

Ireland is the birthplace of the Aos SĆ­, the children of Danu.
This little shapeshifting goblin has child of Danu written all over.
wolfwalkers love hours

Fanart by Amelia Bothe:

And the rest of Cartoon Saloon's Irish Folklore Trilogy:


Little Monsters

This one's a vibe.
It just is.
Can't explain it.
If you remember Little Monsters I love you - GIFs - Imgur

A fairly new one, at that.
As the self-appointed queen of all things 80s and fantasy, it shocked me that this had slipped by my radar because it has would absolutely have terrified me as a kid but would've heavily contributed to the things I love as an adult written all over it.
Maurice is extreme nightmare fodder.
little monsters chicos monsters gif | WiffleGif

Bonus: I was stretching on the floor by my bed whilst watching this when a gigantic spider decided that this was its moment to rush full pelt out from underneath the bed, straight between my legs, stopped dead, we gave each other mutual looks of Oh shit..., after which it reversed hard, disappeared from sight, and I spent the rest of the night wondering if it was going to climb inside my slippers.
...
ALL WHILE WATCHING A MOVIE ABOUT MONSTERS UNDER THE FUCKING BED, SOMETHING I SPENT MY CHILDHOOD BEING TERRIFIED OF AND FUCKING UP MATTRESSES BY YEETING MYSELF ONTO THEM EVERY NIGHT.
...
Fuck sake...
He finally reappeared by landing behind my head on the cushion I was leaning against with an audible thud (yes, he was that sizeable).
After my heart stop fucking seizing, I yeeted him out the window so he could go terrorise someone else.


Pan's Labyrinth

Does this one even need an explanation?
It's the blueprint for all things fairy tale.
Pans labyrinth film fantasy GIF on GIFER - by JoJorn

Pan lures you to the market.
Pan The Man GIF - Pans Labyrinth Faun Creepy - Discover & Share GIFs

The Pale Man bites your head off.
The little girl from “Pan's Labyrinth” is all grown up and totally enchanting

The goblins harvest your organs.
FEATUREFILMS — Food in Film Pan's Labyrinth (2006) dir. Guillermo...
Pan's Labyrinth | Pan's labyrinth, Labyrinth, Film stills

Simple.
Pan's Labyrinth: The Labyrinth of the Faun – Love the Villain

Note to self: read Cornelia Funke's adaptation, you stupid arse, it's sitting right there.


Labyrinth

Make a hard left just before the Fireys, follow the bubbles, and straight on until the glitter intensifies, that's where you'll find Jareth's entrance to the market.
#labyrinth from DuchessofHastings

Delicious fruits, Bowie bangers, and shit hot outfits, the Goblin King's own bloody Ren Faire.
Tumblr: Image

⬆⬆⬆

Also the greatest Fae movie of all time.
Tell me I'm wrong and the goblins'll get you.

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What Kind of Dragon Are You? by Tor/Forge Blog:

Toothless and Dragonite?
Fuck yeah, but I've always felt a gremlin-y kinship to these vertically challenged snack thieves:
Httyd Terrible Terror Terrible GIF - Httyd Terrible Terror Terrible Terror - Discover & Share GIFs

Point of fact: I'm almost certain I've been called a Terrible Terror before.

Speaking of:

My very own book-guarding dragon.
He got very annoyed when I touched the contents of the basket.

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Mari Luoma's Willow Rosenberg Outfit Appreciation:

If you don't understand how iconic the smiley face backpack and purple bucket hat combo is, then I guess we'll never understand each other.

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Heartstopper season two:

Everyone did so wellllllllll.
I can't stop thinking about it.
Season one blew my mind, truly and completely, it was everything I wanted from the comic, but season two is this self-assured monster that I'm sickeningly in love with.
As much as I squee whenever the illustrated sparks appear between my boys, this time it didn't even feel necessary because Kit Connor and Joe Locke did an amazing job of just naturally reading each other.
https://tylerposey.tumblr.com/post/724659517477060608/truth-dare-heartstopper-206

When Charlie needed soft, Nick was soft.
When Nick needed patience, Charlie was patient.
And just like in the comic, it felt natural and genuine.
Their banter was less awkward - but still adorable, they had serious talks without shying away from each other, even those little moments of silence were comfortable and soothing.
And it all stemmed from the pure-as-fuck chemistry between my two cinnamon roll boys.
image
image

If season one was the first flush of love, then season two's the reassuring calmness of making it official, whilst also dealing with the very real issues of eating disorders, homophobia - specifically in the family, ace-awakening, and coming out.
...
I'm not translating very well how fucking feral I am right now for everything that happened, but trust me, I've gone the full gremlin.
My face still feels like there's a coat hanger stuck in there from all the smiling I did, not to mention the finger cramp from the racoon grabby hands I made a the screen every time someone did something adorable.
Raccoon-hands GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

If we don't get a season three (yes, exactly like Good Omens), and they leave use here, with that almost said thing and almost sent text message, gremlin-behaviour will be a thing of the past and honey badger mayhem will commence.
It'd be wise to leave my general vicinity when this happens.

Fanart:
Valery

Edina

Megan Crow

Issy

NOGO!城

Bewi

Chio Rodriguez

Mon Cher

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Brain Things:
Ketnipz

I didn't know anyone else used the weather app like this!
I Like The Weather Good Weather GIF - I Like The Weather Good Weather Sunny - Discover & Share GIFs


Catana Comics

...
WHY MUST I ANTHROPORMOPHISE EVERYTHING?!
High empathy, it's a motherfucker.
Mabel pines GIF - Find on GIFER


Charis Hill

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August's aural acquisitions:
The Beaches // Blame Brett and What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Paranoid

Maude Latour // I am not the sun

Holly Humberstone feat. d4vd // superbloodmoon

Madge, CMTEN, HXSTAGE, Kamiyada+ // THEN AGAIN

Morgan Saint // Did You Lose Your Heart

FRENSHIP feat. OSTON & kate the dreamer // Say Anymore

The Aces // Always Get This Way, Not the Same, Person, Suburban Blues

Crushing hard.

Syd // CYBAH (feat.Lucky Daye) and Fast Car

Bad Omens // Just Pretend

The Japanese House // Sad To Breathe

Pop Goes Ambient aka. Vancouver Sleep Clinic feat. Amelia Magdalena // Flowers (Miley Cyrus cover)

Savana Santos // cheater

Loveless // Drag Me Down

Grace Enger // The Cut and The Neighbourhood

Olivia Rodrigo // bad idea right?

Qazi & Qazi // Hope There's Someone (Anohni and the Johnsons cover) and Weight of Your Bones

Shivers.

Hozier // De Selby (Part 2)

...
Hozier, you gotta stop.
Best Crying GIFs | Gfycat


Ps. Most, if not all, of these turn up in my mercurial Shower Jams playlist.

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Rosi Tooth:

Immeasurably soothed, that's Rosi Tooth's work makes me feel.
Something about froggo, and the texture/colours, and the general laid back vibe in each panel.
They somehow feel like huddling under the covers in the middle of the afternoon or laying back in summer grass, looking at the clouds, hoping the bloodthirsty bugs ignore how delicious your blood is.
shapeless love. : The Secret World of Arrietty - GIF Headers for...

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The Bear season two:

I don't think I've ever seen a show that's been so unassumingly generous in its storytelling.
It asks nothing of you other than to watch, it's almost theatrical in that sense, and it fills you up with the veritable fucking rollercoaster that is existing.
image

From the mundane to the outlandish.
There's no grandiosity in this that doesn't feel authentic.
No performance.
No script.
No outfit.
It's all so painfully real.
And I loved every second.
After the first season I was so stressed out by it all that to this day, I don't know when I'll rewatch it, but this season?
Instant rewatch.
I immediately wanted to do it all over again.
It's magic.
Pure and unadulterated.
It's reduced me to truncated sentences and vocab amnesia.
Random Things & Stuff — Syd + hugs - The Bear s02

I beg you to watch it.
Just, if I could suggest anything, perhaps the first season with a Xanax or a stiff drink and a blanket and an emotional support animal.
Trust me, it's all necessary.

Ps. Wtf, Will Poulter:
depression era — WILL POULTER as Luca THE BEAR Honeydew
depression era — WILL POULTER as Luca THE BEAR Honeydew

He was Eustace like a minute ago.
Wt-fuckity-f?


Fanart:
Guiliana Moon

Sil Chibi

Jae

Pati Cmak

Alex Robertson

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Lucracia Ray's froggos on holiday:

I am frog:

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minaareads' Booktok, show me your... prompt:


Thickest: The Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon

Clocking in at eight hundred and forty eight pages, she's chonky.
And sitting reasonably high on my TBR, but not too high.
I'm genuinely spooked to read almost nine hundred pages of high fantasy, which I haven't done in... never?
Perhaps only when I read the entire Gormenghast Tetralogy in quick succession, but that was barely work.
Six hundred is my usual attention span holding length and even then...
Spaced Out GIF - Spaced Out GIFs


Tiniest: Galatea by Madeline Miller

Tiny but fierce, MM's talent knows no bounds.
I love this edition, it's the perfect size for my gremlin hands, and you can't see it in the video but the gold alloy on the cover was glittering in the sunshine.
Yum.
Tinkerbell Dust Off GIF - Tinkerbell Dust Off Clean - Discover & Share GIFs


Cover I love: The Guinevere Deception by Kiersten White, and Certain Dark Things by Silvia Moreno-Garcia

These two live rent free inside my head; I think about them all the time.
Alex Dos Diaz absolute crushed his take on Guinevere, and the movement in the illustration kicks my brain in the ass - I can see it flowing, like a repeating gif inside my head.
Plus, blue.
I don't really believe in having a favourite colour, it feels too restrictive, but I am very drawn to most shades of blue.
Mix it with gold and I'm palpating on the floor.
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The same goes for when I see traditional illustration on book covers.
I would estimate that 90% of the art we see publishing houses using for their books is digital, be it manipulated stock images, the cursed A.I. (please stop, it's theft), or hiring digital artists to wield their artsy magic.
Stock images are... meh.
A.I. can go fuck its thieving self.
Digital artists can take all my money (Charlie Bowater, specifically).
And the other 10%?
That's where my beloved fine artists come in. My people. My fellow graphite/charcoal/inky brats.
The ones with chronic finger cramp and permanent smudges on their faces.
A fine example: John Picacio.
The man responsible for the deliciously neon cover of Certain Dark Things - a book I, unfortunately, didn't love but refuse to get rid off solely because of the cover - and someone I brazenly stalk for his skills with a pencil.
Every illustration he's drawn for the book world genuinely slaps.
Not a word of a lie.
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Cover I hate but love the book: Magic Bites by Ilona Andrews

Hate is probably too strong a word, I've seen waaaaay worse stock image covers, but this is, in my opinion, the very best of Urban Fantasy, top tier, the finest shit around, and it deserves better than the photoshopped bullshit it was given.
(FYI, this isn't House Andrews fault, authors rarely get a choice in their cover art, and this was their first major release so they really wouldn't have had any say)
It deserves the Dan Dos Santos treatment, the cover artist (and part of the 10% elite as an oil painter) for the Mercy Thompson and Alpha & Omega series by Patricia Briggs.
He creates genuinely beautiful art for such deserving books (my favourite piece  being this one) and I would love for him to redesign the Kate series so their outsides reflect their insides.
I would buy the entire series again.
Sit them by side by side.
And try not to love one more than the other.
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Last amazing read: Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston, and Summer Sons by Lee Mandelo

Queer fiction is truly a special place to be right now, and these two stories blew me away in significantly different ways.
RW&RB is the squishy, "enemies" to frenemies to friends to lovers, forced proximity rom-com with much more depth to it than its cute premise would lead you believe of my soft, gnarled heart's dreams.
I laughed and sobbed my way through it, I haven't smiled as much since, I miss my boys terribly, every day.
history, huh? — red, white & royal blue.
#rwrb from & I wake with your memory over me


And then there's its polar opposite but matching heart, Summer Sons, which takes ghosting to haunting, heart-aching, lyrically-written new heights; a love story, a love triangle, of a kind I've never encountered before and was wholly innocent to just how much it'd fuck me up.
How did I put it in my initial review...


"Summer Sons is steeped in the stygian rot of the undead, it streaks malevolent across the pages with the hot drag of summer, oil-slicked and indelible.
A sticky, fuliginous presence that can be felt as a physical thing through the fingertips, the ticklish crucible of the palm.
You can feel the cool burn of it, on sweat-slicked spines, licked by bony fingers.
Desperation, guilt, grief, they're engraved in every word, each syllable a lacquered threat, and the exhaustion they cause weighs heavy on the characters and the reader.
Summer Sons parallels its southern gothic ghost story beginnings and makes necessary demands of its readers to acknowledge the complexities of being human in an unforgiving society.
Some with a sharp command, others with unflustered recognition.
It's a story with more meat on its bones than its phantasmal premise lets on.
At the heart of Summer Sons, the very basest parts of it, is a lament.
A requiem to those who've lost someone, their someone, and are cursed to live the rest of their life hounded with unfulfilled questions.
No answers to why?, or how could you leave me behind?, and where are you now?
No answers, no resolutions, only the hazy agony that dims with time, and becomes a bearable, softened weight clinging to the living's backs.
In Summer Sons, Lee Mandelo lets us feel, just for a little while, a sibylline moment, what it would be like for that carried remembrance to reach out and touch us back."


Yeah, this book really fucked me up.
It's been almost a year since I read it and I'm still stuck on Andrew, Eddie and Sam, those eponymous Summer Sons, and don't know when it'll end.


Totally underrated: Teeth by Hannah Moskowitz

It only has three thousand, four hundred and fifty ratings on Goodreads, and seven hundred and forty two reviews.
That simply isn't enough.
Those numbers don't reflect how joyful and painful and absurd Teeth is, how beautifully it translates how grief and fantasy can be so tied up in each other their differences become their similarities.
They don't mimic the way my heart clenched tight for two hundred and forty six pages and only unfurled when the last one was sealed up safe once again.
If there was a book I could wave in people's faces and demand they make the fuss it deserves over it, it'd be Teeth.
This book, this fucking book.
smittenskitten: Bruce He as Li Ren Yu in 49 Days...


Okay, this genuinely may never happen again, I don't know if I have the mental capacity for bookstagramming.
I'll be face-first in a book if you need me.
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Red, White & Royal Blue:

Truthfully? I loved it.
RED, WHITE & ROYAL BLUE has now spent 2 weeks as the #1 film on Prime Video worldwide

It's so Hallmark (with a dash of sex *fist pump*!) it's not even funny, but that's pretty much what I expected, and I don't even care because all the way through, I was just screaming:

MY BOYSSSSS! MY BEAUTIFUL STUPID BOYSSSSSSS!

With this gigantic grin on my face I couldn't wipe off.
It's still there.
Perhaps because I've watched it a couple more times since, and will watch it probably an infinite number of times after that.
Of course there are things they changed, and things I desperately wanted to be included:

šŸ‡¬šŸ‡§ Pyramus, Thisbe, the wall
šŸ‡ŗšŸ‡ø The emails and their sign-off love quotes
šŸ‡¬šŸ‡§ The full turkey scene
šŸ‡ŗšŸ‡ø The Cornetto scene
šŸ‡¬šŸ‡§ JUNE
šŸ‡ŗšŸ‡ø The newspaper
šŸ‡¬šŸ‡§ Prince Consort Road
šŸ‡ŗšŸ‡ø Never tell me the odds
šŸ‡¬šŸ‡§ The bunkbeds
šŸ‡ŗšŸ‡ø Alex's breakdown scene
šŸ‡¬šŸ‡§ The kimonos
(Hoe Dameron and Prince Buttercup are iconic, how dare they be left out)

And many, so many more little moments I was feral to see.
But Taylor Zakhar Perez and Nicholas Galitzine embodied Alex and Henry so well, I, frankly, couldn't give a single fuck other than they're on film, in my eyeballs, saturating my brain, and I can pass out happy in a puff of bi-awakening bliss.
Red, White and Royal Blue Gifs

...
MY BOYSSSSS! MY BEAUTIFUL STUPID BOYSSSSSSS!
Red, White and Royal Blue Gifs — Red, White and Royal Blue - 2023 (directed by...


Fanart:
Ame (tenjoura)

LĆ©a Charbonnier

Bhavna

Clara Roux

Isadora Zeferino

Em Parker

Issy

Audrey

A.D

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Patricia Briggs', Silence Fallen:


I’m a mechanic; I fix things that are broken. I turn into a thirty-five pound coyote. I have powerful friends. But when it comes right down to it, my real superpower is chaos.



Never truer words spoken regarding Mercy Athena Thompson-Hauptman, daughter of Coyote, kick-ass mechanic, mate to the Alpha of the Columbia Basin Pack, superior cookie baker, daughter of his heart, Bran Cornick, and all round chaos monkey.
I love her so very much.
As does everyone else it would seem, and who could blame them?
Silence Fallen serves as a devoted Pack cry to how beloved she is, to the sheer number of people willing to cross an ocean to rescue her from a power hungry vampire with an ouchie in his heart - which is essentially the premise for this story.
A few books ago that number would have been on the lower side, what with the Pack being at odds with her status as their Alpha's mate, wife, and equal.
The animosity, lack of care, and at times outright violence hurled her way by people who despised her simply because of her species was, frankly, grotesque, and made for a distinctly uncomfortable reading experience; but as I said, that was a few books ago, we've mellowed since then, punched a volcano gods, set free some grudges, and settled into what I would tentatively call: a family.
Not perfect by any means, not lacking in power struggles or pettiness, but finally sealed with a sense of belonging, of protectiveness, of Pack.
If anyone fuck's with Mercy now, the Pack will rend the world apart to right that egregious wrong; no questions asked, no pausing to weigh up the consequences, just a burst of action that anyone with a desire to be loved would be envious of.
Which is why when Mercy's violently plucked off their home turf and spirited away to Italy for nefarious means, there isn't a werewolf in sight who doesn't volunteer to fetch her home.
She's one of their own, and not simply by Pack bonds.


As they moved towards the waiting vehicles just off the runway, Adam walked behind Ignatio and to his right. "Your scent was on my wife's car seat along with her blood," he murmured, though everyone in their group would hear him. Quiet, he had found, could be a lot more menacing than loud.
The wolf wanted to kill him, but Adam understood about being a soldier and taking orders. Still . . 
Adam said, "I will remember."
"Pack remembers," Honey added.


My heart... it's so warm and gooey...
Drew Barrymore Making Heart Hands GIF | GIFDB.com

I've waited so long for this to happen, so long for prejudiced wolf-babies to get their fuzzy heads out of their collective asses and realise how precious and wonderful Mercy is, that she'd do anything to keep them safe, happy, loved, purely because that's who she is, through and through: a nurturer.
Sure, she can kick your ass seven ways to Sunday if you're being a bell-end, but afterwards she'll bake your favourite cookie once you've learned your lesson, she might even throw in her special made-with-actual-chocolate-and-I-mean-the-good-shit hot chocolate if you're especially penitent.
That's my Mercy, and why I wasn't worried for one second when she found herself a pawn in someone else's petty game.
Drop her in a foreign country full of enemies? No sweat.
Make her penniless and homeless? Meh, grass is soft for coyote bellies.
Rob her of her mating bond? It hurts but she can cope, Wi-Fi's a thing.
Leave her at the hands of a rival Alpha with a grudge? Charm is a hereditary gift daddy Coyote bestowed.
Buddy it up with the Golem of Prague? She really can make anyone like her.
I never worry for Mercy, which is probably a mistake to say out loud because Patricia Briggs will most likely give me palpitations in the next book, but I don't, honest truly, because she's tough as fuck and smart as hell.
There isn't a situation she can't wiggle her way out of, nor a villain she can't charm the knickers off with her off beat sense of humour, before she delivers the smackdown of a lifetime.
No, I don't worry about Mercy.
It's the hereditary chaos problem that follows her around and nudges her into drama after drama that gives me the anxiety pangs, and the nonsense that went on in Silence Fallen was no exception.
For the first time in ten books we're no longer on US soil, ferried across an ocean into unknown territory where Mercy has to claw her way out of the clutches of the aforementioned vampire with an ouchie in his heart, attempt not to get murdered by his deranged werewolf pet, avoid unsettling the balance between European werewolf packs and vampire seethes along the way, reason with an unhinged witch, and ultimately try to get back to Adam and their people.
My poor girl, she barely slept; without her inherent charm and the kindness of strangers, she'd've been schlepping her way around Europe in her coyote form for who knows how long.
As much fun as that might've been, I was near joyful this entry in Mercy's story was split into dual POV, not only because I love alternating perspectives, but because it balanced the hunted emotions flooding her narrative with Adam's military focus, his self-assuredness that nothing, not some mopey vampire or puffed up werewolf, not an ocean would keep them apart.
I really loved Adam in this one.
In Urban Fantasy, at times the male leads can come across as a little wooden, a smidge personality free, and Adam on occasion could be accused of this: he's very methodical, he thinks before he acts, nothing much ruffles his fur except his number one girl, milady Mercy, and even then it's in a way he very much enjoys.
He's a pretty closed off guy, and I spent a long time in the first few books being aggravated by his kept-in-check emotions, especially where a certain ex-wife was involved - Briggs hid the PTSD he has from spousal abuse really well and when it was brought to a head, it finally made Adam make sense - but of course as the books went on, Adam's outward frostiness thawed immeasurably, in no short thanks to Mercy.
Case in point: the opening of Silence Fallen finds him (and the Pack) playing the pirate version of World of Warcraft, going by the name of Captain Larson, and flirting up a storm with Mercy in piratical patois.
Adam is most definitively not your stereotypical UF hero, and just like I do Mercy, I love him dearly - he's up there with Curran, and, Tybalt, and, Charles, and Peter - but getting to see directly inside his head and being granted access to the inner workings of his brain, his heart, his motivations, truly cemented that I am totally gone for Adam Hauptman.
He's smart, he's loyal, he's a certified badass, he's loving, complex, he treats everyone equally, he won't let you down.


“My love," he said, his voice intent, "you are welcome to all that I am, all that I have. I would destroy the planet for you. I was even diplomatic for you, which was a bigger sacrifice. A little power drain is nothing.” 



I knew this for sure after Fire Touched with the way he treated Aiden, his new adoptive son, before he even knew what he would come to mean to him, but after Silence Fallen it'd take a dose of amnesia to convince this isn't the best of fictional men.


[Annabelle] reached up toward his burning shoulder, but he caught her hands before she could touch that one. There had been magic in the dagger, but his wold assured him that it had only caused the wound to be slow to heal; there was no corruption in it.
"Enough, little sister," he told her. "That one won't trouble me much. You fixed the bad one. Thank you." He kissed her hand again because it had seemed to please her so much the first time. Then he leaned down and kissed her cheek. "Be well," he told her.


That is what made book ten a five star read for me.
...
And that Patricia Briggs writes her vampires with knowing Interview with the Vampire hokeyness, which pleases me endlessly.


Guccio smiled, showing white fangs. Then, instead of attacking, he began a slow, backward dance designed to keep Adam on the wet floor and allow Guccio to pick his strike.
Adam thought the fangs were intended as some sort of threat display, but since they were only slightly longer than those of Mercy's cat Medea, they didn't do much to intimidate him.


...
I Can Has Cheezburger? - teeth - Page 3 - Funny Animals Online - Cheezburger


...
And Matt Smith.
How did I not see it?
Bran Cornick, you sneaky, softie, nerd.
Never change.


We watched the rest of the movie without talking. When it was over, Bran said, "I love you."

I said, " I know." Adam nudged me with his shoulder, and I laughed. "I love you, too.” 


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pocketss's Bog Girl and Friend:
(Second panel, third image -her little face, I die)

It's been two years since these two entered my shipping domain.
TWO. YEARS.
When will I be delivered satisfaction?!
You Fix GIFs | Tenor

At least I have Lizard B.Rain's cinnamon buns to dull the separation anxiety:

Knuckle. kiss.
...
It's a shipping "nightmare" for me right now.
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Hunt for the Wilderpeople:

...
dollsome does tumblr — happycabbage: Yeah… majestical… Hunt for the...

Sorry, I fucking loved this but my brain isn't formulating words as to why.
Does that happen to anyone else?
The love overriding the vocab and all you're left with are vibes?
My brain' doing this, basically:
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The cinematic drama of aenniyam:

The last image is a composition that in all visual art forms I find intimate and confronting.
A classic balance of power to place your protagonist in, be it for request, submission, dominance from below, or simply the act of waiting.
In aenniyam's piece, I see a plea for sanctuary, just for a few minutes, to stave off whatever's dogging the subject's every step.
But that could all change with the positioning of a leg, the balance of an arm, the tilt of the head.
A few simple alterations and the images takes on a completely different meaning.
...
Art refuses to cease blowing my mind.
mcavoying: Ferris Bueller's day off (1986) dir. John Hughes

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Rewatching chaos families:
Schitt's Creek

Biological.
media0.giphy.com/media/WRpGY9w0znZ0KgvkSj/giphy-do...


Daisy Jones & the Six

Chosen.
We Were Family Billy Dunne GIF - We were family Billy dunne Sam claflin - Discover & Share GIFs


Ghost World

Besties.
hydrangea garden


Gone Girl

Toxic as fuck.
Amy elliott dunne GIF en GIFER - de Centrithris


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The-addams-family GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

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millyillus cover designing my troublesome fae monarchs:

“I hate you," I whisper before he can speak.
He tilts my face to his.
"Say it again."

...
Fuck, I miss them.
Cindy ✩☽♔'s review of The Cruel Prince

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The Summer I Turned Pretty season two:

My takeaway?

☀️ Love triangles are the fucking worst.
☀️ Everyone sucks but Cam Cameron, Skye, and Taylor.
☀️ Having a beach house looks peachy as fuck.

I'm too crotchety for teenagers who aren't battling supernatural critters.
Where's Steve Harrington when you need him?
Emzies — Countless gifs of Steve Harrington - 22/∞

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When Jack Met Sally:
crazycomet107

Her.
Chonky.
Little.
LEGS!
...
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It's almost time.
Two more months and then we get our spook on!:


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